Should i kick son out?

Question

i am fed up with my 18yr old nearly 19 yr old son,he lays in bed all day,dosnt do anything round the house,he goes out in evening comes home drunk,causing uproar,frightening his younger brother and sisiters,i dont want too kick him out,as he is a good lad,its just when he gets drunk,he gets aggressive,and violent,and argumentive,i had too take his key off him last week,as he was always bringing his mates back,in the early hours drunk,throwing up and making a mess,so now he knocks us up at like 2 in the morning,in the night am fuming,saying he is getting kicked out,but then when morning comes its all changed,until the next time he gets drunk,which is often,what should i do,as i feel am in a bad situation,so i kick him out,or let him stay,he also demanded we cook him food at 2am last night,he was saying i pay keep,i should have 3 meals a day cooked for me,even though he dosnt lift a finger,and only pays £30 a week,and ran up a £300 phone bill,

Answer 1

Boot him out!

He is a big boy and will never learn if you hand everything to him on a plate

Also you must consider your other children here, this is not fair on him

He sounds like he is bullying you lot and getting away with it.

He will soon see what side his bread is buttered if you kick him out he will crawl back in no time a changed young man

Answer 2

Make him get a job, and ban him from using the phone.

I wouldn't kick him out. he's still your son, and he's still young. maybe tell him that he'd have to leave when he's 20, and give him a year to save up the money to rent a place on his own.

Answer 3

Yes

Answer 4

Set some ground rules, try to get him a job. Don't start arguing that would make it worse.

Answer 5

Yes and No.

Yes. Because he has no respect for you or anyone else in the house and I am almost betting the farm and the pigs that his behavior will not stop anytime soon. He sounds like a punk kid who needs to get beat up by his dad.

No. Because he's YOUR son and I strongly believe that kids are products of their environment and parents. If your kids a looser,you maybe,just maybe, have had a little something to do with it.

Sitting him down for a talk or spanking him is NOT going to work. At 18, my mom told me "Get a job,join the military,or go to school...but you are getting the h**l out of HERE!" A month later, I was in boot camp. But then again,when I was a kid,my mom wupped our asses if we did wrong. Kids nowadays don't get beat,the get treats.Or Dr.Phil prescribes drugs cause "he has problems". Its pathetic.

Answer 6

my mum had the same problems with my brother and she sat down and spoke to him about what he's doing and he felt really bad when it was told to him straight. He was 19 and ended up moving out and they get along better now. You need to tell him and be able to let him go.

Answer 7

just tell him that you'll kick him out if he doesn't start helping around the house  

Answer 8

Defo Discuss this with him i am 19 female tho and i live with my aunty i pay £40 a week & she doesnt always cook 3 meals a day for me i am old enough and big enough to do this myself ( she does cook  sometimes tho )so first of all i think you shoudl put the rent up.... then explain to him that he is big enough and old enough to cook him self!! The coming in at 2 am in the morning drunk and causing Kaos is not on is it.... u really need to discuss all this with him and give him a trial say a month if he carrys on then something will have to be done about it threaton him!!

Also put a block on the telephone :-)

hope i have helped x

Answer 9

Oh my, you have a spoiled brat. You're not doing him or your family favors by letting your son keep up his behaviors. Don't make threats to kick him out unless you're willing to follow through on the threat. An empty threat is a joke. Give him an ultimatum and stick to it. Either he follows house rules which are what you and the family decide on OR he will move out. House rules being not coming home drunk, no bringing friends home at all hours of the night, cook your own food, no more verbal abuse and most importantly if he is to live with the family then he acts like family too... meaning he does his own laundry, helps clean, cook now and then, add to the household by getting a job. He's not only helping the family this way he's definitely helping himself. He doesn't want to? Out he goes, just like that. Good luck.

Answer 10

First stop comparing your children.

Sorry but i completely disagree with any parent 'kicking' their children out.

My folks died when i was a kid and all i see around me is families rowing.

You brought him into this world and you brought him up, you should be able to cope with what you made.

Answer 11

book a 1 week holliday, and change the locks, whwen u come back, he will b gone

Answer 12

You are allowing him to take advantage of you and abuse your family. He is not paying enough money for this privilege. Actually he needs to be on his own and face the consequences of his actions if he is to change. As hard as it may be, he needs someone to get tough with him and he needs to be out of your house and on his own. It's the best thing you can do for both him and the rest of your family.  

Answer 13

Doesn't sound like such a 'good kid'  when he's drunk.  He needs to learn some responsibility for himself and some respect for his family.  I say, kick him out, unless he gets a job and starts paying his way within the next two weeks.

Answer 14

He is NOT a good lad. A good lad does NOT behave the way your son does.

It is time to kick him out.He needs to stand on his own 2 feet.Take him to a homeless shelter and tell him"this is your new home for now, learn to love it here, or sober up,become a man and stand on your own 2 feet it is YOUR CHOICE you are an adult now."

Then change the locks on the doors.If he comes back trying to break in, have him arrested.

No matter how much he apologizes or begs, you leave him at that homeless shelter.

Answer 15

kick him out?

where will he go? have you thought about that?

i dont think you have.

discuss this with your son, im sure he has some maturity to understand and maybe change his actions.

kicking him out is definately not the answer. he will just be angry with you and that will make things worse.

Answer 16

"he also demanded we cook him food at 2am last night"

Sounds to me like you're being a complete walk-over.  Tell the little b*****d that he either shapes-up or moves out.  Give him a definite deadline date, and stop being such a wuss.

If my son spoke to me or his siblings in that way there would be more than crossed-words to worry about.

Answer 17

Is your goal as a parent to have your son 'like" you, or is it to help teach him to become a productive member of society? I think you have to make this decision before you will be ready to shove him out of the nest. There is a big difference between helping someone and enabling someone.  

Answer 18

why don't you disscus with him!!!!