What is love in this occasssion?

Question

Is it wiser to let a friend choose and go a path you know it will make him/her unhappy?

So if a friend ponders about going a direction, you "know" it will turn out bad for him, her. Do you still let him/her go this path with the idea that experience will teach him/her? Or would you try to help him/her go a path which is better for him/her, as it will prevent suffering? What if s/he would ask you to help him make this decision, but you know that the good path would be walked from him/her half hearted as s/he lacked conviction, would you still promote in this situation that your friend follows the good path or would you for the sake of learning promote the path where s/he learns from mistakes?

Answer 1

Love is to care and support no matter what.

Everyone has his choice and act.  Do offer our idea and support even though you think this is fatal.  Most of our understanding is based on a few info we have, not even we can see from our friend's perspective most of the case.  So, we might know something is wrong, it might not be the actual situation too.  So, our love is to care and offer opinion, moreover, what ever happen, we still support ...

Answer 2

I don't think we can ever really "know" how a path will affect the course of somebodies life and many negative situations can be the catalysts to more positive ones. I would offer my opinion if they ask (but not pressure them) and support whatever decision they make.

Answer 3

If I know that walking down that path is sure to bring misery, then I would caution my friend...definitely!  Its my duty as a friend to familiarize her with the dangers/pitfalls on the way.  Learning from mistakes is OK but not when the blunders could bring in disasters and then precious time is spent in putting life back on tracks.  

I have actually done it in the past.  And I have the gratitude of my friend and her entire family as that deed was sure to lead to her doom...as later day events proved!

Answer 4

This is a very good question because it raises also the question of freewill and God.

I think it all comes down to if the person experiences the same unhappiness from not having the ability choose the path he/she wishes vs how much unhappiness you know will befall the person by following the path in which you do not allow AND if you are really able to know that a path a person will take will lead to unhappiness (You BETTER be 100% right otherwise you do not have the authority to act as if it is).

If you trully love the person, you will wish for them to be happy as well as prevent them from going down a path you know will lead them to unhappiness.  However, this takes away the choice of the person to decide a path on their own and can be a form of despair for the person itself.

As a result, this person may become rebellious and feel bad because he/she doesn't have the choice to move his or her own path.  I think it is when that frusteration overrides the amount of regret the person will experience (once again you BETTER be right) if he/she follows down the destructive path is when you should let this person go.  This way, they will experience less pain than you holding back their freewill.

Now this doesn't mean the person will become unhappy if you do refrain them, but if they DO, and it overrides the amount they will experience by the path, that is when you should let them go.

Now this is all assuming you are right, and that it is possible to trully know with 100 percent accuracy that the person will become unhappy down the path.  If indeed that is not possible, then it would be better to not interfer with their choice and just give them advice, while letting them choose on their own and supporting them afterwards.

Now I could be wrong on this and I'm willing to change my mind, but the first solution seems to be the most reasonable as of now.  I think it all comes down to really making the person feel happy, and if there are two option, choose the path that leads to the most happiness and least unhappiness.

Answer 5

i wish my friend had stopped me from going down a 'path'.

cause it hurt a lot, and i didn't learn anything worth learning.

or maybe i didn't listen to my friend........... i guess I'd try to stop my friend from going down bad pathways.

Answer 6

For the major question, it will always be unwise to let your friend goes  her path unhappy. What for if you will let her do so, what will bring good to her if she is not happy. Life is live, for us to be happy.

Teachings will only be beneficial if the person is happy on what she learns from it. The bad experiences will go down the drain. It will not allow her life to be successful for it is hindered by the wrong path she leads.Unless it is otherwise, it is wise in this direction to let one's friend give the freedom. You will teach her to lead her way for a better future.

Thanks for asking. Have a great day!

Answer 7

It is our responsibility to tell them if we see where they are going and they don't. We know how much we must say and then let them go.