Question:

What to say to pushy friend?

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Okay, I'm a g*y guy with a partner and we have a female friend that often gets on my nerves by telling one of us what to do.

For example, last night we were at another friends barbeque with her and I was sitting next to her. Someone walked over by us with a plate of food and my friend said "Jim, go get him a chair." I told her, as I've told her on other occassions that she's pulled this, to f-ing do it herself. She said "be a man!" and I told her I AM a man and she's lazy.

I can see her talking like that to a boyfriend or husband, but she doesn't seem to realize that we're just friends and she shouldn't expect anything from me and my partner that she wouldn't expect from any other friend she has, male or female.

By the way, she is perfectly healthy and capable of moving a lawn chair, and she's younger than me.

Should I actually confront her about this or should I just continue to put her in her place as it happens hoping that someday she'll realize it's not gonna happen? I don't want to lose her friendship, but it gets on my nerves when she sits on her butt giving us orders.

Oh, and none of our other female friends do this at all. We are both gentlemen who help out our friends whenever we can and treat every guest in our home like royalty, but this one has an issue.

Advice?

Thanks!

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  1. It sounds like she's probably just lazy and she doesn't want to do it herself. She is taking advantage of the "You're a man, you do it" thing. Just keep telling her that she needs to do it herself if she wants it done, and that she should stop depending on you to do everything for her.

    -Dee

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