When someone becomes "unprofessional"?

Question

I went over to help someone out with their computer and website. This was the 3rd visit I made, on the 2nd visit I had met his wife. Well today when I went into the shop, his wife was not working but there were another employee there. Before getting down to business I asked him how his wife was, and he replied that she had been in the hospital so she wasn't able to come into work. About an hr into things, he began asking me repeatedly why I hadn't called which baffled me because there was no reason for me to call him, and he already knew there had been some illnesses in my family I had to attend to. So then he walks out of the office, comes back in and shuts the door and says he's sent all the help home, and now we're all alone. Ok....FINALLY alarm bells went off, and I said I need to go. As I headed for the door he reached out and hugged me in an ebracing type of hug. I was livid by this point and pulled away from him. Anyway, before all this happened we had set it up that I was suppose to come back this coming wed. and I have ZERO intentions of working with him again. But he also knows where I live (in fact he made a point before all this happened to make sure he had my address and phone # correct).

So I'm not sure if I just shouldn't show up on wed, or if I should show up and tell him I fell uncomfortable working with him anymore and that I won't be back. I am worried tho if I don't show up, he may show up at my house.

Answer 1

I agree that the man's behavior was totally inappropriate.  First do you do this through a business or organization?  If you do, then contact your boss and inform them what happened immediately.  Then call the man and inform him that you found his behavior inappropriate and that you refuse to work with him any more.  Then send him a letter that let's him know this.  Have the letter dated and make a copy, in case of legal issues.  You may need to change your number.

If he shows up at your house then call the police.

Answer 2

Sorry Onyx,I'm sitting here laughing. I can just see you!  Go over there and tell him in front of other employees you can't help him anymore and for him to please not contact you. Show up without an appointment and make sure others hear you! That can get pretty hairy,if you have trouble with him,call the police! Byee

Answer 3

He's a guy and is probably getting all of his signals crossed with you.  You should have made it known at the time he embraced you that he was being inappropriate and if you are to continue working for him that that must not happen again.  He could have given you an answer at that point or told you his thoughts, which would have probably been "okay I'll stop" because he wouldn't want you to tell his wife.  Not being direct with people causes anxiety for later.  YOU will seem unprofessional now if you don't show back up and finish your job.  Confront these situations immediately and in a direct manner next time.

Answer 4

If you don't have a contract with him don't show up anymore. If he doesn't get the hint, tell him that you will only communicate with him through his wife or if she is present.

Answer 5

This man's behavior was inappropriate.  I suggest you make this known to him and do not be alone around him ever since it's clear that his advances were not your "cup of tea".

Answer 6

He has crossed the line of professional conduct.

The formal way to do this. Tell your boss (assuming you are from a firm)

If you work alone, Simply ring and say due to your misconduct, i will no longer work for you.

If he turns up at your house. Tell him your are getting extremely uncomfortable with his actions and if he continues you will be pressing charges against him for harassment

Answer 7

I had a similar problem (won't go into details but I knew he could find me since he'd sent info to my house in the past).

I sent a note advising that I wouldn't be back and gave them the name of someone else who might be able to them.  I didn't go into details, and he did have his secretary call me - but I told her to speak with him about this if there were questions - that I was sure he could explain it further.

He never showed up at my house but I did keep the phone number of the police handy (didn't think it was "911-worthy" so I got the main number of the police station near me).

Stand up for yourself, stay professional and remember that you do not deserve to be treated poorly.

Answer 8

The first answer is a good one, but if it were me I would call him and tell him that I am not going to work there again and if he asks, tell him why. If you are working with an employing agency you should contact your manager (or whatever) and tell them what happened. I think if you're uncomfortable in any situation you should not return there no matter what. Since you are worried about him coming to your house and you live alone you should invite a friend over as a security measure.