When writing dialogue... ?

Question

I have just read the chapter on dialogue in the book Self Editing for Fiction Writers. I feel like arguing about their points. They are the professionals and I am not, but it still makes me wince to read some of what they have said, particularly the parts about dialogue. I quote:

Your best bet is to use the word "said" almost without exception. ("I feel terrible about it," he said. "You always keep me waiting, you never call," she said.) Some writers get a little nervous when they see a long string of said's spreading over the page. They hear the voices of their creative writing teachers telling them to strive for variety and originality in their verbs.

What I'm wondering is, are they correct? I want to be in the Young Adult category, and I'm not sure about that. Ive seen plenty of books with verbs behind the dialogue. It says in the book that it is a sign of sloppy writing and a lack of creativity in the dialogue itself. I cant decide whether to change everything in my book's dialogue or completely ignore what they said. Any opinions? Examples of authors that keep their adjectives and are still good, elegant writers?

Once again, thanks.

Answer 1

A certain amount of comprise is healthy.

I've read too much amateur writing where every dialogue tag is different, as far as possible. A string of 'he mumbled', 'he replied', 'he intoned', 'he breathed', 'he gushed', 'he clarified', 'he lamented' is distracting and ridiculous. If someone is shouting or whispering or giggling, then that needs to be put across, but most of the time these adjectives are TELLING how the words are said, rather than showing through the words themselves. For example, if someone is angry, their words should show it. If someone is answering a question, it is obvious they are replying. If someone is really sad, and their words are sad, it is obvious they are lamenting. If someone is clarifying something, or repeating something, or demanding something, it is obvious! You don't need to tell us! The list goes on. 'Said's fade into the background. They are unintrusive and allow us to focus on the dialogue itself.

It is even better not to use a dialogue tag at all (not all the time, but as much as possible), but to use a slice of action or description instead. For example:

Alice sighed.

"I just don't agree with the points in this book."

Tom picked the book up and leafed through it.

"What is it anyway? Looks boring."

She snatched it back.

"Get off!"

Not great or imaginative writing but hopefully it makes the point!

Hope I helped. 'Self-Editing for Fiction Writers' is a great resource - glad you picked it up. : )

Answer 2

You can tell how someone's saying something by the context.

"I HATE YOU!" she said.

She's obviously yelling.

The reason writing teachers tell you to use "said" is because the word is one of those words so common our brain just skips over it. It facilitates the reading process for the reader, which is a good thing by any measure.

Answer 3

I agree with sentences that you can't put much else in. Like: I feel terrible about it," he said.

It leaves it open for feeling. I could picture how he said that perfectly with no extras. But a lot of times you need more to add feeling and depth to your dialouge. Every one you don't need an elaborate way of saying said, and you don't put said after everything someone says also. You need a mix of both to make it flow better.

I can undertstand where they are coming from. Too many "he whispered softly, looking into her eyes" can be a mouth full to read when you are trying to get a simple talk going. Said can be useful and for people beginning writing, you can't use said too much *though you can...its like saying you can't have enough creativity, but too much detail can get messy...it is like the same thing with said.*

Answer 4

No!  This is completely and totally incorrect.  Strong verbiage is always better than weak, nondescript words.  "Said" is never strong.  The lack of creativity is in the "said" not the dialogue.  There are many fantastic authors that use more interesting verbs, such as exclaimed, argued, quipped... ignore what they say, and besides, it's just a self-help book, and those aren't right anyway.

Answer 5

Actually they're right.  You either want to use "said" or "asked" unless you're trying to draw attention to the way the speaker said something.  The reason is that when you're reading and see the word "said" your eyes are likely to process it without having to slow down to think about it because it's so common place.  

Where as if you want to emphasis what the speaker is saying you would use a word that describes.  The trick is not to do it to often or it loses impact.

So it's not so much a matter of cutting them all out, instead you want to sprinkle through out but only where they're really needed.  Kind of like when you cooking something.  Lets say you really like salt and you like to add it to your food.  Now if you put to much salt on your food you're not going to want to eat it because it's not going to taste as good.  But if you just put on your food where it needs it you're enhancing your dining experience.

Its sort of the same with writing.  If you were to used adjectives and adverbs for everything in your story they're going to lose their impact.  Kind of like when you put too much salt on your food.  Whereas if there's a spot in the dialouge where you want to emphasize the speakers mood using an adjective can help you do that.  You can also use physical description and leave the said.  

Here's an example:

“Hello, Margaret.  I’m Dr. Crawford,” she extended her hand out for me to shake but I ignored it and continued to lean back into the couch with my arms crossed over my chest.  Mom would have been pissed if she knew but who cares.

“Can we just get this over with?”

“Where would you like to start?”  Dr. Crawford picked up a yellow legal pad and pen from her desk the same way Dr. Bryant always did.  I figure they doodle to make people believe they’re actually listening and taking notes.

“Don’t care.  All I want is to get the h**l out of here and on with my life.”

“Why don’t we start with what brought you here.”

If you noticed I didn't use said once.  Instead I used action to describe the scene and let the reader infer for themselves what the mood in the room is.  It's also not important to attribute the speaker after every sentence when there are only 2 people in the scene as long as it's clear who is speaking.  More than 2 speakers you have to attribute the speaker otherwise it gets too confusing.

Not a professional writer but I've been working on my first novel for over 2 years and have had help from some really great people.  I don't know where you're at but you might want to consider finding a local fiction writer's critque group.

Answer 6

Do whatever you feel comfortable with.  If using 'said' continuously makes you feel uncomfortable when writing, then slip in some other words such as ' he asked, replied, muttered, shouted'

About the adverbs, I agree that you should use them sparingly.  Instead of saying 'she said happily' try 'she said with a smile on her face'.

But again, whatever you feel comfortable with and whatever is best for the flow and character of the book is what you should go with.

Answer 7

Actually, they are true, in my opinion, adverbs are just plain unnecessary Why bother say how you said it when you can just say it. Ofr course, you  there are other things, likes shouted and whispered, and use those when you can. But otherwise, stick with said

edit- I guess I get thumbs down for my opinion. Of course you trust random people on the internet more than a professional

Answer 8

I remember reading a book once, and every single line of dialogue had 's/he said' after it. I actually had to close infernal thing after it nearly drove me mad. All I wanted to do was to find the author, hit them with their own hardcover, and tell them that there are alternatives to the word 'said'.

But then again...

It's just as irritating to read a book that has 'creative dialogue tags' after every line, and the word 'said' is completely forgotten. It's always 'she inferred' or 'he exclaimed' or 'they affirmed'. Looks like the thesaurus is someone's best friend.

The way I get by is to use each in moderation. Often, if I use a creative dialogue tag, I will restrict myself to words such as 'spat' or 'shouted', that can easily create an image of the character's actions without overloading on detail. This is especially good when you've already gone through an awful lot of detail beforehand.

Said is still a good one to use when in doubt. The odd 'asked' or 'replied' are acceptable as well.

9.5 times out of 10 times though, it's best to just describe what the character is doing, and add the line of dialogue after that. It saves a lot of headache over what to put.

~Tiger

Answer 9

Hi! I've actually been thinking on this a lot for the last couple of years. I've read books that tell you to use "said," but which way is it? The conclusion I have come to is to base the dialogue on the character who says it.

For example, in Anne of Green Gables, many of the characters use adjectives with said (ex. Anne said wistfully, "Don't you know what it's like to have dreams, too, Marilla? -- not really from the book, I just made this example up). This is because Anne is so chatty and is so free from the shell that some people put on to impress or fit in that everything is seen as a certain way, whether others like it or not. Also factored in is the age in which the characters live -- how much information they have to hold back to stay safe.

But in some other books, the characters are more withdrawn and scared of others. They don't really have a tone of voice they say things in. This is especially good so readers can envision their own way of saying things.

I think a combination of the two is the best way to go. Use adjectives when it's important or even neccessary to get a certain meaning, but don't use them if it's obvious or fluctuating. Good luck and have fun writing!

Answer 10

O_O

Honestly, if I saw a page littered with a string of "said"s, I would probably just put the book back down and find something else to read.  

There are many says to say things.  You can shout, you can demand, you can order, you can ask, you can reply, you can repeat, you can cry, you can swear, etc.  I would keep going, but I don't think I need to.  A thesaurus would know better anyway, lol.  

I guess it's just my opinion, but I think that book is horribly wrong.  "Said" is boring, mundane, and just lame.  I try to use it as little as possible, actually.  Sometimes people do just "say" things, but usually there's something more.

Maybe the book just wants to prevent people paying too little attention to the dialogue itself.  It would be simple to tack in some lame dialogue and excuse it with a dramatic verb in place of "said," but I still say the book's author(s) is going about it all wrong.  

I hate "said." >.<;