Why Be Yourself...?

Question

I hear/read tons of people who are saying 'Be yourself!' on many subjects: friend-making, how to ask out someone, and tests. Sure, everyone has their own unique personality, but some might have to change some aspect of themselves to achieve something. A guy's girlfriend could ask him to stop drinking, gambling, wasting money, or eating too much, but this would require the man to NOT be himself, but to develope a new identity. To make friends, it is possible that no one will like the one a person truly is, but if one starts clowning around, breaking rules, or something else, one may be able to make more friends than he ever could. Being one's self seems to be one of those 'Great Almighty Ideals', but then why doesn't it work in most cases? I've tried to follow this 'Being of Yourself', but it has lead me to be depressed, lonely, and run-down. Recently, I've alienated myself from the 'Former Me', and it seems that life has gotten much better. I don't see how this works . . .

So, my question is whether being yourself has truly helped you. If it has, then why do you think it does? If not, then (please) explain how or why it doesn't.

Answer 1

alright! let's make it clear here pal. Being yourself is really important coz that's all you can DO. And there's a fine line between being yourself and bad habits. Eatin' junk food,smokin',gambling,drinkin' are bad habits and you need to get rid of them. Bein' yourself is also needed to be kept to be logical and reasonable. You can't go out there and shoot random people and say you're bein' yourself coz you find it pleasant in doin' so. That's not bein' yourself, sure i mean that kind of bein' your self is sick.

Bein' your self should head you toward the good and right things. Remember you only live once and if you live right, once is enough. And for me, i'm rather being hated for what i am than loved for what i'm not

                                             Good luck on being yourself

Answer 2

being urself doesnot always hellp u but it does do the following things

- it makes u an indivigual

- iti makes u different

- if u r like evryone u have no personality and isn't ur personality the only thing worth living?

- u r a puppet of someone if ur not urself

but if there r a few things tht r suppose to be bad they should be changed......... but if u like  something about urself and  someone tells u to change something about u tht u like ......yell them to get lost

Answer 3

I'll only live once so why not be myself?

I'd be wasting myself if I tried to be someone else.

Answer 4

well for one, asking someone to stop drink or smoking or gambling isn't asking them to be someone else. its asking them to develop healthier habits.  and the only way people won't like the person you are is if you don't like the person you are. there's more to being yourself than just acting to same all the time.

being myself has helped me out a lot more than trying to be someone else. at least, its been less troublesome.  we have problems and while being someone else may solve them temporarily it, in the end its more trouble than its worth.

Answer 5

yes, in many ways it has. lets say that I'm a more "in your face" type of person but try to make myself be more quiet and reserved. it's not going to work for me at all! im trying to force myself to be something i'm not, something i wasn't meant to be. perhaps being an "in your face" type of person will help in my career choice of being a prison guard or correctional officer. being quiet and reserved is NOT going to be beneficial in that aspect! of course, i still need to learn to be tactful and to adjust to whatever situation I am in, but in all that, i do need to be true to myself and what i was made to be. hope that helps.  

Answer 6

Life can be simple; do what you love, do it good, and everything will fall into place; friends, love, been there. hugs

Answer 7

The "be yourself" mantra is the enemy of progress and self - improvement.

Answer 8

It's better to be alone with your self,

than to have friends crowding a you as a person you don't know.

Answer 9

Yes, be yourself changes everything for the better. Unfortunately, most people don't know how profound those words are. Socrates said it like this: "Know thyself." Jesus said it like this: "Worship in Spirit."

We are Spiritual beings, so being in the self is being in the eternal aspect of who we are.... and in time that transforms us from what we were in the past, and ends all those problems you mentioned in your question.

This resource will explain the whole thing in terms of Christianity... http://gospelenigma.com That resource is a revival of the Original Gospel which was all about being yourself... your real self... a child of God.

Answer 10

Because in the long run it will pay off. Dont get discouraged so fast. as long as your honest to begin with, you wont come across any problems.

Answer 11

look your not living your life true

inless your being urself

why pretend to be something your not  

Answer 12

i agree

being yourself = being what you think others expect you to be

a mom expect her son to behave, so the kid either be good or bad

but the kids action is based on mom's behavior, which is based on people around her

celebrities are a good example

being myself did not help, i changed into a better person, become what others expected me to be, and now i have too many friends, and i truly don't care for anyone of them, or anything at all, i just pretend i do.

i pretend i work

its all good

Answer 13

I don't believe drinking, gambling, eating too much define anybody as a person. If you get rid of your bad habits, get help with your addictions and work on your flaws, it doesn't mean you have to become somebody else and get a new identity. It's true that we all adapt to different situation and sometimes act differently in different situation (for example at work or among friends) but that doesn't mean you are not being true to yourself. I don't think being yourself got you depressed, there have to be deeper issues that make you unhappy and when you pretend to be 'somebody else' you don't have to deal with those issues.. Ultimately, you can't pretend forever and it won't make you happy. It's better to dig deep now and sort everything out and figure out what makes you unhappy. You can never run from yourself, no matter how hard you try.

Answer 14

Being yourself tells everyone that you aren't a pretender. Pretending tells everyone that you are a fake, like Miley Cyrus. Being a fake makes you have haters. And also, you know when you're being yourself. Don't you feel corrupted when you aren't your self? You are the only one, other than God, that knows you.

And also, being someone different just to be popular won't get YOU any friends. It'll get the other person friends.

Answer 15

Be yourself is definitely excellent advice.  I've found that I can never be happy if I'm pretending to be someone I'm not.

First of all, though, I think that you should realize that drinking, gambling, wasting money, etc. are not activities that express who you are as a person.  As part of personality (which is what being yourself falls under...being true to your inherent personality), we are not programmed to be drinkers, gamblers, etc.  Those are just actions people fall into when they don't have the strength or will to come to terms with their real selves and their real problems.  This is bad because problems and struggles, when we face them and conquer them, further develop a competent personality.

Anyways, being yourself is the best policy when making friends and dating, because if you be yourself you will attract the kind of people whom you are naturally compatible with.  Although faking a personality that seems to attract more people (clowning around, breaking rules) may appear to be a successful strategy, wouldn't you rather have friends who are there for you when you need them because they understand you than friends who are just looking to get a good laugh at your expense?

Being yourself DOES work, but the reason why it seems like a 'Great Almighty Ideal' is because it can be difficult.  My absolute favorite quote,

"To be nobody-but-yourself -- in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else -- means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting."

e e cummings

explains it best. So even if it seems like it's not working, being yourself is rewarding in the end.

Personal experience....

For years, I was trapped in a middle school where being myself got me no friends, as the choices for friends were confined to a very small class number.  It became depressing, knowing that no one would except me as who I was, and I even tried following the personalities of people I wanted to be friends with.  I became miserable and was only accepted for a limited amount of time, and even then it just didn't feel right. Later, I switched to a different school for high school, and I now have many friends with very similar personalities.  It's THE MOST SATISFYING THING IN THE WORLD to be accepted for who you are and to feel comfortable being the person you were born to be.  You owe it to yourself, so please don't give it up.  I know it can be hard, especially if your choices for friends (like in a school environment) are limited to people different from you.

Alienation from the 'Former Me' sounds depressing.  It's understandable if you feel that "yourself" is changing, but I wouldn't try to change yourself by force.  That turns into a nasty internal struggle that is hard to live with.  When trying to be yourself, though, you have a natural advantage, because it should be almost an instinct.  My advice is finding an activity during which you feel complete as a person (for me, it's writing), and find out as much as you can about yourself while doing it.  Sometimes, being yourself can be confusing, and you may need to first discover who you are (NOT who you feel society wants you to be).

Good luck! And I'm sorry if I wrote too much, but it's a topic close to my heart.  If you want further advice from the experts, try consulting Ralph Waldo Emerson's "Self-Reliance" essay.  It always inspires me. :-)

Answer 16

Being yourseld does not help, it' sjust supposed to be honest, but half the time i'm notr myself.