Why does my friend do this???

Question

i have a friend who is not very close to me, but she's in my group of friends. whenever i hang out with her, she talks absolute c**p about her best friends, like her extremely close friends. she also treats her friends (and i'm not talking about myself here because we're not so close) like c**p in person too, but not as bad as behind their backs! and the girls who are her best friends always complain about how she makes them feel bad, but they're hanging out with her again the next day. she holds grudges about tiny things like if you buy the same shoes as her or like the same guy as her. i'm worried about the girls who are her best friends, but I don't want to interfere because it's not my problem.. but it's REALLY bothering me these days. why does she do this? it's driving me crazy!

Answer 1

She's doing it to be the center of attention.  She also obviously has very low self-esteem (it can come off as being stuck up sometimes) You can't change a person though, but you can start by telling her friends that they need to be honest with her about how she makes them feel.  They can do this in a nice, non-harsh, manner.  "so-in-so, I didn't realize you liked the same guy as me, but just like you, I can't help who I have a crush on.  I didn't do it to be cruel or mean to you, but it does hurt my feelings when you get mad at me because we share similar feelings for a guy"