Would you comment on this poem?

Question

The letter

by C.S. Scotkin

I read your words

but never your mind,

where was your heart?

How did you think,

what was your plan?

Now that you’re gone

I’d like to know

where was your heart?

where is mine now?

Answer 1

crying. crying. what words. i feel not so abandoned.

Answer 2

This is a good piece, and if you can't find your heart, I'll be glad to help you look for it.

Answer 3

Its a pretty good poem.

About a guy breaking you're heart.

You should write more.

Answer 4

I think this is a very good poem. I like it because it is simple yet it holds emotion. Good job! :D

Answer 5

i like it alot

i agree you should write more

the more you write the better

you'll get

Answer 6

great!! xx

Answer 7

The first two lines are a fine distinction, line two also of time (frequentative) contrasted with the title (perfect); the repetition of the third in stz. 3 is magisterial.  Stanza two leaves me lukewarm; the last line rings hollow, perhaps even inauthentic, possibly because stz. 2 is so intellectual.  Thank you for this.

Answer 8

The last stanza is the strong ending that this needs.  You could almost expand the thoughts more in the first two stanzas and leave the third as is to give more impact.  Either way, well done.