Question:

Reminiscences ... any thoughts on how to improve this?

by  |  earlier

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We used to walk, holding hands, laughing

touching,

no need to talk, on railroad track

empty beach, or vacant street

sit in noisy restaurants, never speak

Just you and me and what we thought was turth.

Two forgotten coffee cups, cold like guilt or fraud

balancing on the edge of being left forever.

The single lie between us.

We had no hunger and no thirst.

We ate and drank each other.

My arms and thighs never wearied

from the weight or want of you.

Now those days, long passed, dimissed

some of them forgotten,

pushed hard and held

behind my eyes,

to be recalled on lonely days

in someones elses smile.

Someone elses

walk along the railroad ties.

What is love but seeds of sharing, caring?

Passions gestures, swept away by winds of time

Springing forth in the youthful urges

of my strange children long ago conceived

on vacant beaches in the sun

or under moon and stars

finally burried

planted somewhere in the earth

The loam of an idle mind.

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  1. You're one of the few people outside of my contact listing that I truly enjoy. I delight in your point of view, and more often than not, you quench my thirst from within.

    "balancing on the edge of being left forever"

    "we had no hunger and no thirst"

    "my arms and thighs (wow!!) never wearied"

    These lines will resonate with me for quite some time. (The last one is very sensual...) I imagine a deep love, perhaps only lust. Reminiscent of a first love...

    If I may... dimissed... dismissed?? As well I am curious as to your choice of words here... "my strange children"

    That line made me stop dead in my tracks, to question why they were strange??? Was that intentional?? Again just me being curious...

    I'm forever looking beyond the words...after all beneath there is a heart beating...

    Much love always!!

    Temari


  2. ; : 0 )

  3. Wow! The places our mind takes us to, My mind shares your

    journey, of a similar walk, love never dies, and sometimes haunts, as you say idle mind, yet  travels idle or not.

    This one touched many places in my heart. BRAVO!

    Excellent poem.

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