Repressed memory or just a nightmare?

Question

I have been wondering this for a long time, but to be honest, I have been afraid to ask... because I have been afraid to find out the answer.

I think this is one of my first memories. For some reason I forget all about it for years, never thinking about it, and than somedays bits and parts of it come up.

I remember when I was really young. Before kindergarden..so maybe around 3. I remember getting into the car. it was cold out. We drove some place, to some guys house.

Next memory I have of that night is I walked out from my bedroom and saw my mother making out with a man that was not my father.

The thing is... My dad has been mad at my mom for something for years now. Something he wont tell us. they are still together, but when they fight, this always got brought up.

So I guess my question is... do you think my mother really cheated on my father... or do you think this was all just a dream I had a while ago?

I asked my father about it, and he says that never happened, but that was after a rather long silence.

Is their a way to fully remember this? To get this repressed memory out of my head and remember it?

Answer 1

it could be a dream, like the ones that happen and they end up being true in someway sort or form...i think something went on ask your mother

Answer 2

That's horrible, weather it was a dream or memory. You could try getting hypnotized. Sounds weird, but it worked for my sis in law. She had to stay in therapy for a while, but she says she's  glad she worked through her issue.

Answer 3

Repressed memories don't work, you remember or you don't, that's that.  If something like this has happened you will know someday, for now it sounds like Mom and Dad are taking care of their family, run with that, they love YOU!  

Answer 4

It's between your parents.  It doesn't matter, unless you feel somehow traumatized by it.  In that case, still go to a counselor and not your parents.

Answer 5

I know exactly what you mean, that hapenes too be alot like a dream i had  so long ago and now rembering it i think it really happened but i'm not sure. So i think in your case it did happen, since they are mad at each other for a reason you don't know.

Answer 6

wow

Answer 7

I had a professor at university tell us that it turns out that most "repressed" memories are fictional.  Time lines down match up...yada

But then again I've had memories that after a while I begin to think "could that really have happened?".  I began to doubt them, but then my siblings mentioned the same event I thought "couldn't have happened".  

Can you confront your mom about these memories?  Like nicely bring up "remember when I was three and you brought me to a mans house?  Who was he?".  See how she reacts.  Don't ask about the making out and don't accuse her of cheating... bring it up casually.  

Answer 8

i think you created these "memories" after the continued strain on your parents' marraige.

so no,

i don't think it's a repressed memory.

Answer 9

It might of happened,but it still might have been a dream. The best way to figure of is to go to your mother and beg for honesty. You would most likely be able to tell is she's lying. Just reassure her that you will not be angry with her.

Answer 10

If you have a parent you can trust and talk to, I would ask once I find a good time, like when you two are alone and the mood feels right for some deep conversation.

I would only do this if you feel that parent is approachable on that type of subject. Make sure you keep our attitude mature, too, and don't judge or criticize if she breaks the out the truth. Remember, she may be having difficulty with it, too.

Answer 11

Sorry to say.... but I think your mom cheated on your dad..=/ Because it sounds so real like that would have happened by the way you explained it...

Answer 12

It sounds to me you do remember what happened years ago and probably that is why he dislikes mom so much its sad but she messed up got caught and now is in h**l i am sure with him. hes not giving in nor is he going to counseling for this either that is sad. you know life goes on and if there is something wrong it shod tried to be fixed but not there. you can go to the doctor and get serum and find out he could help if you want to.

Answer 13

Ok first of all you need to ask your mom. And have you ever seen the guy in person? If not so then it must be real, but if you've seen him before then it's not. Ok could you actually walk in your dream? If you did you were probably sleep walking while dreaming cause i do that sometimes. If it was actually real could you feel stuff that you could feel in real life? You need to ask this question to you and your parents. But don't interfere with your parents because it's not your bee's wax( sorry i didn't know how to spell buisness). So let your parents handle it. This way when it's finally your time of day like that you'll know and hopefully if you have a child they won't interfere.

Answer 14

dangg.

that sucks.

but you can never really be sure.

lol

It might not have happened...but yet it might have!

Answer 15

Undergoing regression might bring it out, but really, what would you do with it if it's true. The undertone I'm picking up in your letter -- correct me if I'm wrong -- is the tension in your family because of some unresolved issue.

You might try asking your dad why there always seems to be tension between them. He might not even be aware of it. Or it might be something unrelated.

Marriage is complicated and there are sometimes many causes of tension. You might approach it from this perspective: Tell your dad and your mom what you see, how you're interpreting it and how it is affecting YOU. If they're not willing to resolve their issue(s) for eachother, they might change their minds if they know how it's affecting you. You would think parents would know, but sometimes they don't and need to be made aware.

Good luck.