Rights to child?

Question

I am 24 weeks pregnant with my first child apart from the odd text message off my childs father i have had no support from him. He says when baby is here (which he will not come to the birth) he will take me to court if i do not allow him to see his son. He has so far bought the baby nothing and spends all his time out clubbing and texting me about his nights with his new girlfriend. I asked when he would fit his son into his life to which i was told his mum will look after the baby while he goes out but he seems to think its unfair i told him this wouldnt b happening.

What rights do fathers like this one actually have?

If he took me to court would he get any access?

Answer 1

are you married ?

Answer 2

he gave up all rights to the child the minute he said he wont support him Let him take you to court, its him who will have to pay the court fees. your baby doesnt deserve to have some one like that in his/her life. I would go to the citizens advice bureau and get in there before he does.

Answer 3

What every one is saying is true and correct, take it a step further and change your number so he can't text/call you anymore. You do not have to give him the new number and if you don't want to, you can leave him out of anything. It will up to him to prove the paternity of the child at his expense. Most likely the judge will side with you.

Answer 4

Just save the text's to take to court with you. He's digging his own grave so to speak. Just collect any thing he gives you, and be ready to fight it out in court. He won't get anything but visitation most likely. I don't know exactly how it all works, but if he isn't helping you, isn't there at the birth, and is worried about partying and being hatefull....a judge will take your side hands down.

Answer 5

Lose this idiot already! Tell him you were mistaken and the baby is really someone elses.It sounds like a dismal future with him in it.

Answer 6

If he wants to see his son, make sure he pays you Child Support.

Answer 7

the most he could probably get would visitation rights. he sounds like an irresonsible person. as long as you are a good mother and the baby is well cared for with you the judge would not grant him custody

Answer 8

simple - breast feed for the first year!

best wishes, H x

Answer 9

Since you are unmarried, you have NO requirement to even aknowledge you know the father.

When the baby is born, DO NOT admit you know the father.

Don't put it on the birth certificate. (UNLESS YOU WANT HIM TO PAY CHILD SUPPORT).

In order to get any legal right to the child, he'll have to go to court and get a court ordered DNA test, and wait for the result. This will take a month -6 months.

Then he will have to go back, once he has positive paternity results, with a lawyer and see if a judge will give him any visitation.

A judge is unlikely to give him extended (overnight) visits with a young baby (especially breast fed) and at the most will get a weekend every other week.

Especially if you are unwilling.

Note - if you want monetary support, do the opposite of all of this.... you can't have it both ways.

Answer 10

Depends on where you are and the laws of the area where the child lives.

The father would have to sue you for visitation.  In so doing, he would have to demonstrate why it would be beneficial to the child for him to be involved.  Generally, the court tends to agree with this as it is in the best interest of the child to know and to interact with its father (there is research to support this, even if the guy is an a$shole).  

As for you, you will have to demonstrate why the fathers involvement would be detrimental to the child (drug use, criminal behavior, severe mental illness, pedophile, etc).  However, do know if you try the mental illness approach, you are going to have to submit to an evaluation as well to demonstrate your mental fitness (this could work against you if you are mildly nuts in any way).

In the end, dad may end up with every other weekend, every other holiday, every other of the kid's birthdays, every fathers day and fathers birthday and 2 non-consecutive weeks each summer.

Usually, the payment (or non payment) of support generally does not come to bear on these proceedings.

Good luck

Answer 11

not much he certainly wouldnt get custody of your baby! maybe visitation rights every other wekend for an hour with you, If that does happen Id suggest you never meet him without another adult with you, you never know what he would try to pul off, ie trying to get the baby off you! keep every text he send you, keep a diary of all contact he has with you, do it now try and rememeber when he has gotten in contact with you in the past and what he said. Maybe you could get a little recorder, and record all conversations with him, try and goad him abit if he says hes gonna leave the baby with his mum while he goes clubbing wont sound good to a judge!

At the end of the day baby needs to be with its mummy, and the judge knows that and he will only give custody of the baby to ur ex. in extream circumstances. if you have your parents close by tell them what hes been saying, get there support and just try not to get stressed by him, hes just talking c**p! his new girlfriend wont want a baby round thats not hers! I bet he hasnt even told her about all this like she will stay round if he says he wants custody of the baby!

Id go to see a lawyer though and get some advice just so you have all the support and help you need, plus you can document with them what hes been saying to you, start to build a case against him etc.

- but dont tell him anything about any of the things you do! you want him to be surprised and unaware and un prepaired!! act dumb dont let anything slip!

good luck x

Answer 12

I am a single mother of Pix my five year old son and Samantha my three year old daughter, Jerry left about five weeks after Samantha was born, and I took him to court makeing him give me some money to pay for this, and he asked if every Sunday the kids could come to his house and I told him "If you wanted to see them why did you leave after they where born?" he's so stupid any way I don't think he should get access

Answer 13

honestly if u can do with out him financially when the baby is here dont put his name on the birth certificate and he can not and will not see the baby even if he takes u to court.

Answer 14

You are really having a hard time here, and looking for answers

and I guess reassurance.

Rights to access are set by a court - if he goes that way.

The best I can do is suggest that you seek legal advice soon and keep any text messages and any other evidence you can gather.

Also do not reply ti his texts in the heat of the moment and only in general way if at all.

Answer 15

ok what u need to start doing now not telling him is anything and everything he does start a note book and right down the day time month everything and what was said anything he mails u make copies and texts have ur phone company print copies to send u that away if he does take u to court u have document of everything said and if u get the dates the court will know u are for real. my mother had to do that with me and my brother and it worked out very well . it will be more in ur favor for custady

Answer 16

If I were you I wouldn't even put him on the birth certificate (which you can't anyway if he doesn't come with you, in the UK), therefore he would have to prove parental rights (and pay for a DNA test) to have any rights at all.  It doesn't sound like he would go through any of these hoops.

I wish you the best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy and your baby.  Forget about this waste of space and focus on you and your little one!!

Answer 17

Call his Bluff - Tell him to take you to court.

Sounds like he'd be far too lazy/uninterested to even enquire and in all honesty once he's found out the costs I doubt you'll hear from him again.

Answer 18

if your married the dad has equal rights, if your not married then he doesn't have any rights, at the end of the day though it's whats best for your kid, and thats knowing who his dad is, @rse or not!