Roommates use my bedroom as a guest bedroom when i am away

Question

Whenever I am away (1 night, 1 week or 1 month) my roommates always allow their friends to stay in my room when they spend the night. They never ask me for permission to let them sleep in my room. We have a sleeper couch and a air mattress in our living room, but i guess they see it as more of a convenience to just let them sleep in my room instead of having to pull out the couch. I am very anal about having a clean/organized room and hate it when I come home and find pieces of candy or long brown hair strands(I have short blonde hair) lying on my floor. I am not trying to accuse their friends of stealing my stuff or anything its just that i don't feel comfortable with people i don't know sleeping in my bed or touching my stuff.

Do I have a point in telling my 2 roommates that nobody is allowed to stay in my room! (unless its a close relative of theirs-which is fine!)

Answer 1

Remove all the sheets, blankets, and bedspread. Tell them you are having your bedspread dry cleaned or something. A bare mattress is not that inviting.

Answer 2

it's your room, you're paying for it, you have every right to tell them to get the heck outta there...

Answer 3

That is the pain of having roommates.  It probably will not change until you move out on your own, or get married.

Answer 4

Get a lock for your door, asap. Inform your roommates that under NO circumstances will you allow their friends to sleep in your room when you are away. The first time it happened, you should have put a stop to it. However, since this is your situation now, take charge and ensure it stops now.

Best Regards,

Holly

Answer 5

Of course you have a right to not have your room used when you aren't home.

I assume you are paying some of the bills and are intitled to your privacy.

i wouldn't want anyone poking around my room and using my personal things.  

Answer 6

....And you can't just move out?!

...or put a lock on the door to your room!

Answer 7

You have every right to ask that your room not be used as a hotel.

I'd put a lock on the door.  You can easily install a doorknob with a keyed lock, like you'd find on an entry door, so only you have access to your room.  It only takes a few minutes and will give you peace of mind.

Answer 8

There is an amazing new thing called a door lock. Buy one and use it to keep your things private.

Answer 9

I had a room mate who used to do that too and thought absolutely nothing of it. I found it disgusting because I did not know her friends AND they used my sheets. I however did not have the option of locking my door, as we shared a room. Don't let anyone make you feel like you aren't being a good person or room mate for wanting to protect what's yours. Who wants to share a bed with a stranger? That's just gross. You absolutely have the right to tell your room mates that your room is off limits. That can even include close relatives. People buy air mattresses and sleeper sofas for a reason. Otherwise just get a lock for your room.

Answer 10

Yeah..that's not cool..

She shouldn't be having people stay in your room when you're not there.

You need to tell her to stop doing that.

Answer 11

Tell them that it's your room and you don't want others sleeping in your bed. You're paying rent (I assume) and you want your room, privacy and belongings to be respected. Tell them that there is a perfectly good pull out couch & if the guest does not want to sleep on it, one of them should sleep on the couch & forfeit their bedroom.You are not out of line!

My boyfriend had the same problem, he told the room mates & eventually ended up buying a new door k**b and having a lock on the door.

Answer 12

share how you feel with your friends and if they still insist lock your door when you leave

Answer 13

Another reason for getting your own place....Unless you put a lock on the door they will do it anyway......

Answer 14

Lighten up about your space and lay down rules.  Strip the bed before you leave and they will have to provide clean sheets and blankets.  Tell them to vacuum before you return to your room.  

Why force someone to sleep on the sofa or an air mattress when there's a perfectly good bed available?  Maybe you need new roommates whose ideas of friendship are more closely aligned to yours.  

Answer 15

Ewwww...

I would tell them no one is allowed in my room while I am gone.

You pay your share of the rent, so you should be able to say who enters your area.

Answer 16

You have a right to your privacy.

Speaking with your roomies is a good place to start but I rather doubt they will listen. Sounds like you’ve asked them before.

How about putting a hasp on your bedroom door?

How about finding your own place?