SO torn. Go off birth control but be careful? Ovulation calculators?

Question

I am 30. I have been with my BF for 15 months, he's 28. Recently we have been talking about marriage, he insisted on looking at rings with no pushing from me AT ALL. The problem I am having recently is I am worried about birth control.

I have been on BC since I was 16. Three months ago I switched from the patch back to Ortho-Lo due to the blood clots scares with the patch. Ever since I switched back my period is abnormal and the bloating is CRAZY. I want to know what it feels like not to be on BC. What side effects will go away (bloating, headaches, abnormal bleeding). I feel like I've been on it for so long, I don't even know my body anymore in it's natural state.

No, I do not want a child now, I'd like to be married. I thought about going off and using an Ovulation Calculator, as well as "pull out" method, and condoms if he wants to...what are your thoughts? I'm also scared that 14 years on BC is s******g me up for when I DO want kids...that many years of artificial hormone cannot be GOOD??

Answer 1

If you do not want a child, do not go off birth control.  Talk to your doctor about alternative methods.  Rely on the "calculator", and you will wind up pregnant.

Answer 2

It would be a good idea to be off BC a while before getting pregnant anyway.

Why don't you consider a diaphragm.

Inexpensive and effective.

Over the years we tried the pill, IUD and the diaphragm.

The last was the easiest , most benign and effective of all of those methods.

Of course it means you must "touch yourself" but it takes no more time to use than a condom and does not affect sensation.

Answer 3

Used carefully and consistantly, Natural Family Planning is very effective -- not 100%, but nothing is.  And if you combine it with condoms, you should be very safe indeed. (I wouldn't bother with pulling out. It wont' add anything more to the effectiveness, and will just frustrate your boyfriend.)  

If you do want to use NFP, you need to research it and understand how it works and how to monitor your fertility signals.

Being on the pill for 14 years will not cause any issues for you when you decide you are ready to get pregnant.  You should go back to 'normal' within a few months at most of the last pill.(There is NO evidence that the pill causes long-term issues.  Most women who think it does are women who have fertility problems before they started. Often the doctor will prescribe the pill to treat irregular periods -- not realizing that the periods are irregular because the woman isn't ovulating.)

Answer 4

Well, first of all, you're probably right that the BC will create at least some issues when you get off of it.  When I went off, I had to wait 3-4 months to see my "real" cycle.  I still had a wacky one right after the BC.

As for your question about getting off of it.  If you don't want a child right now and being pregnant would cause major issues, don't go off BC.  The pull out method is completely unreliable.  I've gotten pregnant that way in the past (and I'm married with 3 kids, 1 miscarriage).  The ovulation calculators "guess" when they think you'll be ovulating based on the information you put in.  Right now, you said you don't even know your body so you don't know what your average cycle length is.

Sites like Fertility Friend and the Fertility Planner on I-Village are both great but really geared toward women trying to conceive.  They aren't recommended to prevent pregnancy.  They use several signs of fertility to help predict ovulation like your basal body temperature, mucus signs, and cervix opening.  I've used this method for a couple of years now and actually got pregnant after a year using the "pull out method" in conjuction (I then lost that baby).  

I guess what I'm saying is, you need to make the decision that's right for you.  You need to decide how bad it would be to pregnant if it happened right now.  If you and your BF would be totally devastated, then stay on BC until after the wedding when you said you'd be ready.  If you think you'd be happy about it, then go off it.  Good luck!

Answer 5

Your concern is understandable.  That's a long time to be on artificial hormones.  But normal periods do come with all the problems you mentioned.  Many women take the pill just to deal with those side effects.  And, honey, if you use the calculator and pull out, you WILL get pregnant.  

Talk to your doctor.  Get some real advice.

Answer 6

I have to be honest with you, when I was on birth control I felt like such a whale! Ive always been a pretty small girl but found it difficult to keep my weight down without massive diet & exercise (esp after a switch from the patch back to ortho-tri-cyclen-lo) when I got closer to my 20's because of all the hormones

I got off the birth control a few years post meeting my husband (then boyfriend) like you I had been on some form of b/c for years made a switch and was tired of the extra 10 pds As soon as I got off the pills I literally lost 15 lbs effortlessly because all the nonsense from the pills was flushed out of my body

At the time we didnt want children either, & we did use the pull out method (I know dangerous) as well as condoms sometimes  &  we did not fall pregnant, even with 'pre-***', the entire time We used this method for 2 years (without the ovulation calculator) until we got married Then when we were ready & he let a few loose I did fall preg *yay*! Maybe i was just lucky in that dept lol

The only thing is that there is a possibility that you could become preg, & you guys should talk about what you would do if that were to happen My experience overall was very positive I did not like the side effects of the medicine, and my body felt fantastic when I stopped the hormones All the best

Answer 7

Look into Natural Family Planning ( NFP ) it is very effective. Don't be fooled by doubters, it is not the old "rhythm method".

My husband and I are newly married. I did not like taking birth control anymore, wanted to let my body regulate ITSELF rather than take a pill.  We are not planning to have a child right now,and NFP has been effective.

After all, you take pills when you're sick, not to stop something that is working just as it should be right?