STAY @ HOME MOM OR KEEP ThE CHILDREN IN DAYCARE??

Question

my children are 1,2,5 & 6 and they go to day care their father (my boyfriend) thinks I should quit my job so that the kids can be home and not @ daycare. but we could really use the extra money. the kids will be in daycare about 40 hrs a week maybe less. I really want to keep my job, he makes enough to keep the bills paid and stuff we need but not enough to be able to take the kids out and have fun or buy them extra things they want or to go on vacation the money i make will allow us to have a little fun..i think he wants me home because during the summer I work every weekend and i am on call even the days I do have off BUT the hours their in daycare wont go over 40 hrs because his job. they will only be in day care from 9am-3:30pm monday through friday....so should i have to quit my job??? I really want to keep it, not for me, but for the children..am i being selfish..also we are very lucky to have work in the town we live in because work is very hard to find..

Answer 1

I asked this question several times! i have 4 babies and did not want them in daycare, plus with the cost of 4 babies in daycare, it wouldnt pay me to work in corporate America! i finally came across Mary Kay skin care products and makeup, i was hesitant, but i tried it! I am making more than i could at a job ( i dont have a college degree) and i can stay home with my kids! I LOVE IT! I am now on target to win my first free car!! the rewards are endless, you get what you put into it! if you would like to learn more about it, please check out my site at: marykay.com/ashleyfritz or email me at

[e-mail]

it gives me the much needed "girl time" that I didnt get just staying home,I really enjoy it! my goal now is to get more women in the homes with their children! i worked in a daycare, i KNOW what they are like!!

Answer 2

Keep your job.  Clearly it is working for you.

Answer 3

u should just pick which ever u think is best for your kids...for example; a while go back my mom got fired from her job, it was a pretty desent job. she would stay home with me and my brothers everyday, she would pick us up from school and we would love that time we spent with her...but my dad has a blue collar job and all that time that she didn't work made it hard on him and he was considering getting a second job. which ment that we would never see our dad. we almost had to move and i noticed that we couldn't get things as much as we wanted before and birthdays were hard too. my mom has a job now but it's really far from where we live and her other job was closer....ik my situation isn't exactly the same as yours but it might help....we loved being home with our mom but it made things harder financially....so i think u should just choose which ever will benifit u and your family in the future.

Answer 4

I don't see the problem with daycare.  You want to be able to do things as a family; nothing wrrong with that.  It's important for your children to be happy and healthy, but for u to also.

Answer 5

If you're not cut out to be a stay at home mom, definitely don't be. You certainly don't want to miserable and if you're unhappy, I imagine your children will be unhappy as well. As for daycare, there are lots of new studies in the child psychology field that suggest that daycare is actually better for children and that daycare actually puts them ahead in school. Additionally, I would suggest putting them in Montessori daycare if it's available and affordable because it's proven to be pretty amazing.

Answer 6

i wouldnt do it, its alsways good to have the money u need, but it would be great to have the money u want to do things. plus i think daycare is good for kids. they get to be around other kids and learn new things and get their energy out by running around and playing. i wouldnt quit my job if i were u

Answer 7

If you already know you aren't cut out for being their primary caregiver during the day, then so be it. Lots of kids have gone to day care and turned out to be fine, productive members of society. Don't let him guilt you into quitting. Would he quit to stay home with four kids??? I doubt it.

Answer 8

I see nothing wrong if you want to go to work.  You need to come to a compromise with the kids dad.  Tell him how you feel about not wanting to be home all the time and how happy it makes you to work so that the kids can have extra.  It doesn't mean you love your children less. Try part-time work.  That way you both get some of what you want.  You can still have some extra money, and you'll still have at home time with the kids.  Also...you need to keep the skills that you have developed in the work force.  What if there comes a day when you will have to support the family?  Anything could happen...I don't want to scare you but he could get sick, seriously, hurt, die.  etc.  Good luck!

Answer 9

first of all this is totally your choice...If you think it would be better for your family all around to stay at work then by all mean stay.And it is not selfish for a mother to want to go out into the world and have a life. I am a stay at home mom that worked my whole life and now i am miserable... I wish i could work but  it is just to hard on my husband (who works 65 hr weeks) to come home on friday after his long workweek to  watch the baby. We tried it didn't work out, he would call me at work and say the baby is ccrying i don't know what to do! And it would make me so mad. Like i can come home right now. Don't do that to me... I would tell him. But everynight he would call and be like come home. so this is what im saying do what makes you happy don't sit at home and be depressed if you don't have to be.....Trust me

Answer 10

Why not work on opposite shifts to your boyfriend, so that the kids don't have to be in daycare at all?  They can be with dad, instead!

Answer 11

Your children would benefit more from you being at home than extra toys and cool vacations. If he's willing to be the sole money earner, take him up on the offer and stay home. The kids will love having you there, he'll love having you on weekends, and its so nice to not be on call. Its hard being a SAHM, but its a joy too. You can get out and meet people as a SAHM. I'd have gone crazy otherwise. Your oldest is 6, that in itself will provide you tons of friendship opportunities as the eldest starts school and activities.