Salam ... i need help plz ?!!?

Question

salam alaikum brothers and sisters .. plz i need ur advice if possible

have u ever felt that u r sinking in a dark hole with no1 to help ? ... i feel all alone even though i am surrounded by ppl ! i feel angry sometimes and rlly sad ... and i have no1 to talk to and even if i had .. i don't know what to say cuz i don't know what is wrong ?!!

this feeling comes and goes ever since my mom died three years ago .. she and i were so close to each other ... she was the one who was always there to listen to me and make me feel better when i'm down !! no 1 day pass without me regreting letting her push me away .

i wish i could spend a moment with her .. subhan allah .. she had always made things easy for me !

i've been asked this Q b4 and i answered it but some how i can't answer myself !! i hate this feeling and i wish i could make it go away but i can't !

i know u guys r not shrinks but .. if u've ever felt this way or know what to do .. plz help me

thanks in advance .. jazakum Allah khair

Answer 1

I'm not a doctor but I know that is its possible you are suffering from depression which is normal after a grievance and everyone can understand how you feel.

Try to talk to someone as letting out could be what you need. And when you feel sad, try to do something you enjoy or keep yourself busy with something. It's not bad to get councelling, explain to your dad that you need to talk and that you need him to understand. Try to explain that you are not losing it and that councellers are not for mental people, they are NOT, they are there to help you understand your feelings and Inshallah make progress with them so that you can feel better.

I know this sounds weird, but eat chocolate when you feel sad. It relases endorphins.

Most of all, make Dua for your mother. Don't despair on the promise that we are given by Allah. Just pray that Inshallah you will both meet again.

Salaam Sis

Have faith in Allah

Answer 2

you are in very sorry condition may be that is because  you are missing  your mother that's the real point  but live goes on it never stops God loves  you  and it will not put you in that  much  grief which you  can't tolerate that's it . love God and  try to think about any other thing and try  to  forget    that I know it's not that easy  but some time later you'll able to get over it

Answer 3

Try not to think about it too much.

Just keep yourself constantly busy doing positive things and then you'll soon find the feeling you have now will go away. Surround yourself with positive people to keep you company, whether its at school or work.

Answer 4

Aleikum salaam dear sister,

I'm truly sorry that you've suffered such a great loss. I can only imagine the pain that you've been going through.

To answer your question, yes I have felt it as well. We are all human and not perfect and will sooner or later feel the need to reach out and the wish to lean on a trustworthy face and cry. You're going through a mild level of depression and I truly believe that happiness comes from within and this frail world is only a small factor.

Try as hard as you can to not live a life with regrets. You can't physically spend anymore time with her but that won't stop you to pray for her and wish to see her once again someday. Remember that life happens as quickly as batting your lashes.

Remember her, make a scrap book, be happy when you think of her and just celebrate her life instead of mourn her death. Think of all the beautiful things she did and how many lives she touched.

Whenever you're down, speak to Allah. Pray and thank him for the blessings to have let you love someone and to receive such love that it's been worthy of missing.

If all this is still not sinking in, then think this way: one day we will all pass and leave loved ones behind... when such a day does come, how would you like your loved ones to be once you've passed on? Would you like them to mourn forever and live life in depression or enjoy the blessings they've been given?

Every mother, including yous, only wants the very best for their children. They want to see them happy. If not for you, do it for your mom, cheer up and be grateful to Allah for the all blessings you've been given and seek Allah's guidance and light to see you through this tough time and to move through life as peacefully as possible.

Wish you all the best.

Wasalam.

PS. Remember that you're never alone, and will have someone to talk to. If noone, then you can email me anytime :)

Answer 5

I really felt sad while knowing this!

May Allah bestow blessing on Your Mother.

Don't u thing a  person that comes on earth has to go!

soon i am gonna die, as well you too.

Why don't u see the live of Our Holy prophet (PBUH),

When  Our prophet(PBUH) was born, before his birth his father(R.A) passed away, soon in a couple of year after Hazrat Amna(R,A) passed away, His grand father started taking care of him also passed away soon after !!!!    

Why was this with the most lovable person of Allah on earth!!!

Because Allah is only the caretaker of our Holy Prophet(PBUH),

he guided him at every stage at every moment,  

My sister now start praying for your bother,

Because What u do on earth the benefit will go her there!!!

Answer 6

sister it's normal.

when you feel depressed remember this hadeeth.' when you are depressed remember the depression you faced by loosing me.'

remember Allah a lot and keep in mind that when you have a pain then your sins are been washed and that you get ajr 4 your patience.

by the way are you a teenager? then it's very common. teenagers with parents feel lonely and get short temperd. so all i say is EAMEMBER ALLAH.

MAY ALLAH HELP YOU AND GRANT EASE TO YOUR MOM IN HER GRAVE AND BLESS HER WITH JANNAH IN AAKHIRA.

AAMEEN.

Answer 7

Salaam.

First off, I am very sorry to hear about your Mother's passing. May Allah forgive all her sins. Ameen. May Allah bestow his mercy upon her and send her to heaven. Ameen.

What you are feeling is depression. This is completely normal when someone whom you are close to passes away. When my grandfather passed away, I felt exactly like you. I would suggest the following, they really worked for me.

1) Write your mother "letters." Kind of like a diary, except to your mother. This really helps with putting you thoughts down.

2) Pray and make lots of Dua. Make Dua to forgive your mother, and for Allah to bestow his mercy upon her.

3) Talk to someone you trust about what you feel. It may be hard at first, but getting your thoughts and feelings out really helps.

In-sha-Allah, these steps will help you feel much better.

Best of Luck!

Salam.  

Answer 8

u should consult psychiatrist. and pray to Allah so that he can help

Answer 9

If my mother passed away, I'd want to go with her. There is no way on this earth I could live without her, unless a miracle happened.

I truly feel for you. But, I think you don't need the ramadan section on yahoo. What you really need is a meeting with a bereavement counsellor who can truly understand how you feel.

May Allah (SWT) bless you.

Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi rajiuun

Answer 10

I know exactly how you feel. i have been through it my dad died just over 3 yrs ago, and i always feel down and i just get seemed to make an effort with anything, and i just always cry

but i think what you should do is surround yourself with the ones you love

Answer 11

salaam

i know how you feel. as if your falling and u cant get up. i was there.in my situation, i didnt pray and i lied and told ppl i did. i was growing farther and farther from our beloved religion, islam. i decided to push myself to the limit and get back up, and that is sumthing that is very hard to do.

also, my dad died when i was only 4 years old. i guess i can relate to your pain. i always, always thot my father was the one that held my life together, from falling apart, from crashing down. but you'll soon realize its the pain talking. its not that your mother wasnt a part of your life, but it was that you realize what she was, in your life. its just like this now becuase your only starting to realize some of these things.

i hope you can find some guidance in my words. i wish there was more i could do to help, but this is all. may Allah (SWT) guide you through this hard time.  

Answer 12

Only Allah can help you. He made also source you can consult psychiatrist.

Keep yourself more and more time in prayers and reading Quran and athentic Hadith. This might hdlp you.

And what I can do?

I will pray for you.

Answer 13

I suggest you to get married if you are adult.