Scottish 3 Year old PreSchool Worries?

Question

Our son has restarted preschool and it seems that something has happened to him that has made him unhappy to return. We have tried to gently coax it out of him but have been unsuccessful. We are both victims of abuse and are so worried that something like this might happen to him. We live in a small town and the preschool is not perfect but we have no other options.

How can we find out what has happened to our son, if anything? He was so happy at preschool and loved to do all the things he did there. Now when we drive past it he cries because he thinks we may take him there.

We worked so so hard to make our son a happy boy and its breaking my heart to see him so unhappy and frightened. When I pick him up at preschool he is crying with relief to see me.

Answer 1

I would first call his teachers and ask whats going on there. It's unusual for a child to be content with a place, in this case preschool, and the next day(s) not be.  I would also ask if one day you can sit in during a class, or make an unexpected visit to check out things for yourself.  You could also call other parents to see how their children are doing (if they've had any changes in their mood toward the preschool) If that doesn't work I would defiantly call his pediatrician and ask for their advice. I would also reconsider taking your child to that preschool, if you believe it's not the perfect place for him.

I take my son to a parent co-op, so I know there will always be other parents in the room and another advantage is that it does not cost as much as other preschools.

You are resposible for your child and if something is going on you should get down to the bottom of it. If you're not defending your child then who is?

Answer 2

i would say it will be good if u can communicate with the teacher in school to find out wat happen.. sometimes kids are like that.. the will enjoy school at the beginining.. when they find out that school is not so intresting anymore then they will lose intrest... try to talk with the teacher to see wat happen and also communicate with ur son.. ask him y? i know some 3 yrs old kid might not be able to answer ur questions but they r able to understand and answer yes or no.. u can ask questions like...... y r u crying? did ur teacher scold u? did ur friend bully u? and etc

i hope i've help u in this area...

Answer 3

Very small things can make a child unhappy and if they don't have good language they can't tell you.  AS it happen when he restarted pre-school it might be that he was happy when he though it was for a short time but now realises it is for ever.  (This happened to my brother.  He went to school really happily for the first week but then when Monday came around after the w/e he was appalled to hear he had to go again).  Playing with playmobile people with him and having them go to pre school, play and do the activities would give him the chance to show you what was happening.  Have all the children's names so you can say, "Oh look Freddie wants to play with you." or say, "Which are your friends?"  and let him show you.  Do talk to the staff.  Ask about how the day is organised and they do a timetable using pictures.  Then go through it with him and give him happy faces and sad faces.  Talk about the day and at each activity as him to choose a happy face or a sad face.  Like the role play this can be great fun and so he won't feel pressurised to say what is wrong if you treat it with a light hand.  Hope this helps.

Answer 4

It's difficult when they're so young and not so verbal. I would suggest asking the preschool director if he/she knows of any situation that happened OR if there's an ongoing situation. Especially since he seemed to like it and THEN his feelings shifted. You could try using dolls/bears to have him play-act, with one of the bears as him and then showing you what happens when he goes to school (using other bears etc). If that fails and he still continues to be unhappy, could you make the changes so that one of you could stay at home with him? That's what we did...it's worth the sacrifice; we worked on opposite days/shifts. Good luck! You can give no greater gift to your child than you!!

Answer 5

It is an awful feeling to think your child is being mistreated. What if he is? What action would you take? Would you find other childcare for him?

You mentioned that there is no alternative.

I am asking these questions because I am a parent of a daughter who was molested right under my nose. I trusted the person 100% and it never entered my mind at any point. It wasn't until she was older and could put into words what had happened to her that I knew.

She showed signs that I did not read. I didn't know what those signs where.

The website below lists the typical signs to look for. My daughter showed two of them and I took it as separation anxiety.

Like another answerer said"Get to the bottom of this"

My best to you and my heart goes out to your son.