Seating Chart Dilemma! HELP ?

Question

We are having 170 people attend our wedding. However there is a BIG PROBLEM!! My Fiance's family is from Russia, so the only person that is family attending our wedding is his mother...His mother REFUSED to help with the wedding and refused to pay for ANYTHING! Here is the problem,

My family HATE His mother with a passion. She is RUDE and SELFISH. NO-ONE wants to sit with her on the day of the wedding. NO-ONE wants her to sit with them at the reception. where do I sit her.

My Fiance invited 40 Friends that his mother has NEVER met. So were stuck. Were do we put her. My dad says, there is NO WAY IN h**l that she is sitting at our Table with our friends or family...ADVICE?

Answer 1

can't you just let everyone sit where they want? that way, the rest of your guests can mingle and then your mother in law can strike up a conversation with some random person at a random table because yours is full (a-HEM) and she'll stay out of your hair. free seating encourages everyone to interact more.

Answer 2

I'm worried that if your families can't even sit together, you might have bigger problems than the seating chart! It would be nice if his mother could sit with your parents since she doesn't know anyone else, but if that's not possible, put her with your fiance's friends who are the most likely to include her in conversation.

Good luck!

Answer 3

I think your family is being a lil inconsiderate, they should be able to handle her for one day. They should try to swallow thier pride (even if she is as horrible as you say), and sit next to her. I think they need to understand that she is your future husbands mother and she is a part of your lives. If they still won't budge sit her with some of your husbands friends, even if they have not met.

Answer 4

It is your wedding and everyone in your family should be supportive in making the day as easy as possible for you.  Tell your parents that you appreciate all that they are doing for you and you agree that your mother in law to be is a wretch, but it is inappropriate for her to sit anywhere else but with them.  She is family now too, everyone needs to accept it.  Does you fiance agree that she is as awful as you say? If so, he needs to have a talk with her and tell her she better be on her best behavior, or he may have to reconsider having her there.

Answer 5

Okay, instead of having the traditional family tables and the wedding party table, you could do a horseshoe shape with three or however many tables. At the middle it would be you and the groom, next to you would be your parents and next to the groom would be his mother. At the two outside tables would be your wedding party. No one would have to sit directly next to her except your new hubby.

Answer 6

Seat her with friends but don't stick her in the back of the room. Even if you don't like her she still deserves respect. I know it's hard (I'm having the same problems) but you can't stress about it too much. I would introduce her to the friends before dinner or have your soon to be husband introduce her. She wouldn't be sitting with them the whole night because people always get up after dinner anyway.

Congrats!

Answer 7

try his friends.  at least they will have something to talk about  (her son).  let the groomsmen know that if there is a problem, they need to play bouncer and get her out of there w/o anyone getting hurt.  if she can behave her self everything will be fine.  if she can't have her removed, she not allowed to ruin ur wedding day.  tell ur family to chill out that day and remember it's all about u and ur groom.

Answer 8

I think the best thing to do is have a talk with your parents. Tell them that you know they don't like her, but it is only for one day. Most of the time they will probably be away from their seats anyway. It really shouldn't be this much of a problem.

It looks like your parents are going to have to be the bigger people here. Yeah, this woman may be rude and selfish - but I am sure that they will figure out a way to get along. Have your parents put themselves in her position - she is alone and no one in her family is going to be attending the wedding. I think that seating her with his friends that she hasn't met could be a little bit insulting.

Tell your parents that for everyone's sake they should just all try to get along.  

Answer 9

The put her next to the friends that don't know her!  

but the your parents need to grow up Sorry!

Answer 10

Well seeing as how she IS your fiance's mother, you have to sit her with family, your parents would be the best. Tell your family, you're sorry but that's the way it's gotta be. They don't have to like her, but they do need to be respectful. This is your wedding, and you need to treat everyone equally. You can't sit her all by herself in the corner or anything.

Answer 11

Okay first of all, both your Family Members needs to quit being so childish and selfish, they need to put their problems aside for one day because its your Wedding and its the Happiest day of your and your husband's lives-so they need to be able to come together as a family for the two of you! Tell them for those of you who can't behave yourself, "Don't show up!" Do it for your Husband! I'm sure your husband would be sad if his Mother would be left out!

Answer 12

I'm not sure how soon your wedding is, but I would have a gathering of your husband to be's friends and mother.  That way she has an opportunity to meet people.

You could always ask her who she'd like to be seated with and let her know that you are not going to seat her with your family as you intend to have separate tables.

Also, it's YOUR wedding.  If your family can't look past their hatred of her for one day out of respect for you and your fiance they are very selfish.

Best of luck to you with this one.  I hope you have a beautiful wedding!

Answer 13

Its tradition for the grooms mother to be at the head table but of course its up to you where she goes.

Does your fiance want her at the head table ? after all its no good your dad saying your future ma-in-law cant sit at the head table as its nothing to do with him the only people that should sit there are the bride and groom and both sets of parents, whom you chose to add on after that is up to you and your fiance.

What do you want to happen ?

Check things out with your man and come up with a solution that pleases both you and your fiance and forget about everyone else, its his mum after all and he may want her with him.

Good luck, at least she is coming to the wedding where is everyone else on his side ?

Answer 14

Your parents especially must realize how ridiculous it will be if this woman is not seated at the head table with the rest of the family.  It's just one day it's not like you are asking her to move in with them.  If she's such an awful person why even have her there?

Answer 15

Your Father needs to calm down and stop throwing unresonable demands into the mix, and EVERYONE needs to remember that this is the woman who gave birth to the man you are in love with, and however difficult she may be, she deserves respect and a seat at the top table.

Answer 16

Have her sit at the head table. That's where we seated my husband's father who came from Eastern Europe for our wedding. He sat by my husband's brother (our parish priest too), so someone could translate things for him, even though the program was bilingual.

Is language an issue as well? If so, seat her with someone who is a Russian speaker at least - the priest, maybe? idk your circumstances.

Answer 17

Hi.  Please listen to yourself.

His mom is coming from Russia....knows no one....and you are in a dilemma of where to seat her?

She deserves to sit at the same table as your parents.  I am sorry they don't like her (have they even met?), but you cannot stick her in the back of the room at a table

for 1.  PLEASE!

Tell your parents that you are not asking them to invite her over for breakfast....it's a simple dinner, then they can get up and mingle with the other guests (as they should.)  They do not need to sit at the table with her the whole night.  But for the dinner, yes, they do.