Seeking advice.. my mother is crazy!

Question

my mother and i fight all the time, usually stupid stuff. but lately she has been so spitful and mean its driven me to tears. just yesterday she left me a voice msg saying 'you stupid dumb fing b*tch..id kill you if i could.' i dunno about you, but im pretty upset. then she called an hour later crying to apologize. i havent talked to her yet in person about it and i dunno what to say.

why would my own mother say that stuff!?

Answer 1

lmao im sorry im laughing cause mehh and my mom are like that

is she bipolar ???

Answer 2

oh, i think you need a help of a pshycologyst, go to a family theraphy

Answer 3

Oh my gosh, my heart breaks for you because this sounds all too familiar, I have heard the same and even worse words than that come out of my own mother's mouth.  My mother walked out on my brothers and I when we were young.  Her and my Dad spent many years in court fighting over materialist things.  Since I was the oldest and only girl, I was put in the middle of the whole situation and heard terrible words about myself come out of the mouth of my own mother.  She has calling me a dumb fing b*tch, she has threatened to kill me, and she's said even worse things than that to me.  I'm 26 years old now, I've given my mom 3 chances to be a mother and everytime, it always ends up the same way with her doing or saying stupid things about me.  The last time I tried to speak with her, it ended in her saying something bad about my brother, when I went off on her for saying something about him, she starting calling me every name in the book.  After that day, I realized that I DO NOT need her in my life.  I hope that you are able to work things out with your mother, but, know that other people have been there, too.  There's no reason to be verbally abused by your own parent, especially your mother, the person who brought you into this world, if they feel that way, they had no right being a mother.  The only good thing I can see in what you said is she called you an hour later crying and apologizing, my mom has never once cried or apologized to me about anything she said, so, maybe there is still hope for your mother.  All the best to you!!

Answer 4

hahaha my mother is the same way!!! I cut loose ends and she was one of them..after a few weeks of silence and then talking to my mother again i SAW the real her clearly....it wasnt pretty so i decided to cut it for good. So advise to you is lay low for a few weeks, do your own thing, work, go out, whatever it is that you do and then when your ready have a conversation with her over the phone (its easier for people to be ******* over the phone) and listen for subtle hints of craziness which are sure to be present.....i think all mothers of 20 to 30 some year olds drank some BAD water in their days and turned out like this...

Answer 5

It sounds as if your mom has a problem with herself not you.  Unfortunately you are the one she vents on.  She does need help and maybe you can offer to assist her to find where the help may be available.  Pick your time to approach her about this.  If she ever suggest that she needs help or does not understand why she acts the way she does, then take the opportunity to suggest getting help.

Answer 6

Okay let her clam down.....

and talk to her gently like i missed you and let's get together.

K?

Answer 7

When you know she is not home leave a message saying that though you love her very much you will not tolerate being spoken to that way even by her. When she can be civil, she can call back.

It is obvious that she is upset over something that may not have any connection to you, but you are a safety net and she can call and abuse you without fear of losing you.

In her sick way she trusts you, but it is sick and you cannot allow anybody to abuse you.

Good luck, pray for her.

Answer 8

i think your mother has tensions on her mind about something.

may be she is confused.you are a daughter of your mother and she probably loves you.she needs your care i think.

do not mind if she does these things with you.just talk to her in calm manner and make a coffee or tea for her when she returns back from work.it will help you believe me. if she was crying and apologized to you then it means she really loves you and feeling embarrassed after doing that.

just hug her.it will work!!

good luck!  

Answer 9

Your mom is on edge. Any little thing even false things will set her off. You seem like a nice person. Try to ve there for her and let her share a little what is going on. If a person has no one to talk to and bottles it all up...it spills. Be good and listen to see what is up. Take Care!

Answer 10

All mothers are crazy *** h**l

Answer 11

um myabe she is bi polar??

Answer 12

try to talk to her about it.

Answer 13

Sounds like your Mom may need to seek professional help.

Answer 14

wow, if my mother said that to me it would take me a long time to forgive her, and yea i'd be pretty upset too. sorry but i don't know why she say that to you. I hope you work it out though:)

Answer 15

sounds like your mom is having problems and is taking them out on you. Get her some mental help. It could be depression or something else along those lines.

Answer 16

I'm not sure what your situation is, but I wouldn't talk to her for awhile.

Answer 17

Get away from her.  Get far, far away from her.  There is a book called Toxic Parents.  Read it.  I have the same problem with my mother only I live with her!  She has cancer and I came here to take care of her and she is abusing me nonstop.  She is paranoid, delusional and very hurtful.  If I lived separate from her like you do, I would so never call her back again. Change your number.  

Your parents brought you into this world.  You are here because of them.     You are not here for them to abuse or work out their frustrations on.

You need to send a message that she is not going to treat you this way.  Your parents can really mess you up if you let them. DON'T LET HER.

I really wish you well.  I know where you're coming from.

Answer 18

im in the same situation believe me its awful

your mom may be bipolar, mine is bipolar and an alcoholic

you just have to be strong with yourself, because you know shes crazy and theres nothing you can do. Have close friends that you can tell stuff and go to, but you really have to fend for yourself until youre out of the house. dont get depressed because of that, being depressed is being weak

Answer 19

if that comment from your mom shocked you, then you know it is not really her, it is out of character!  something must be wrong; sounds like she needs meds.  If you are old enough to be out of her house, then get out!  the two of you are going to continue to say stuff you regret.  If you have to stay in the house avoid her!

you should not have to deal with this alone!  can you get anyother family to help?

Your mom will take the suggestion of getting help from a friend or older family member better than she will from her child.

If she called and apologized then she is upset about it too.  Be honest with her about how that message made you feel, let her know that it hurt you!

But this is serious b/c she did not just say something cruel, she said she would kill you if she could.  If she is that unstable it is not too much further before she is unstable enough to hurt you or herself.   SAVE THAT MESSAGE but try not to listen to it over and over!  you might need to play it for other people to ge tthem to believe you!

If it is needed you can always use that threat to have a mental health warrant issued (judges will issue these warrants if a person is in danger of hurting themselves or others)

your mom may need psychiatric evaluations and help!