Self-esteem problems ?

Question

My sister has really low self esteem, especially about her weight. she is 5'7 and weighs 130lbs. I think she is perfectly fine the way she is but she won't listen. I think its partly because whenever my sister loses some weight, my dad goes, great now you need to lose your love handles or thighs etc. how do i tell him to stop saying those things, in a nice way? Are there anything my sister can tell my dad? and any suggestions to boost her self esteem up?

Answer 1

First off let your dad know he is doing wrong by saying that to her and tell him the reasons and start complimenting her as much as you can (may sound weird lol) but yeah and hopefully she will feel better

Answer 2

your sis is fine the way she is, im the same hight and i weigh 140lbs, and i get pissed off becasue my mom is always saying that i have a fat ***, well i just tell her to shut the $%^& up and say that i am fine the way i am, try to gett your sis to gain confidence in herself and tell the dad off

Answer 3

pull your dad aside and tell him saying things like that to her are NOT okaay. tell him not to be offended by your advice but that he needs to stop.

and tell your sister that she really is beatufil.

from her height and weight she does not sound big at all.

:D<3

Answer 4

There it is; you said it, your father hurts her feelings. The first man that a daughter wants to be proud of her, is her father, but he says denigrating comments, like the one you mentioned. How sad. Talk to your father, don't shout or get disrespectful, but let him know how his comments hurt, effect her self esteem, and that they motivate your sister make bad decisions. If he keeps this up, he may loose his daughter to the first character that treats her nice.

Answer 5

i have the same problem.

my mom tells me she weighed 80 pounds when she was my age (14)

and now i have anorexica

maybe tell your dad that if he keeps doing what hes doing he might make her not wanna eat anymore and get anorexica and anorexica isnt fun at all it may make u thin but if your hospitalized they make you eat and they make you gain more pounds and if u dont gain anything u cant leave intell you do.

Answer 6

Ohhh, family members are such complex people, aren't they? I think I would start with you telling your dad on the side that it may be in your sister's best interest to not even mention her weight. Or just say"You look good". And leave it there. Any negative comment stays with a person for a long time if not forever. If your dad continues, then maybe she needs to let him know that his comments hurt. If he won't stop, she may need to distance herself from him if it is causing a major problem in her life. She needs to be happy with herself and if it means minimizing time with hurtful people, it may be the route to go. If not, she'll have to develop a thick skin which is easier said than done.

Hope this helps!

Answer 7

Well, tell your dad in the nicest way. My suggestion:

"Hey dad, I've been worried about *sister's name*, she's really hard on herself about her weight. I think we should encourage her to keep working on getting fit, and compliment that she's looking slimmer."

Something like that, but here's the thing.  DO NOT MAKE YOUR DAD WRONG IN ANY WAY. This will now get him to cooperate, just simply suggest positive things towards your sister, and tell him that we need to be here for her and I don't think we are doing our best right now. If you want to do something else fine, but by no means do not make your father feel wrong. Because that will make him target you with some drama that you don't need.

Good luck! Hope things get better.

Answer 8

Hi

See it in another angle, maybe your dad sees something you and your sister don't

he feel that if losing love handle or thighs will make her looks better then there may some truth in it

maybe your sister is losing only waist which is not getting the optimum slim result