Serious Issue- CHILD ABUSE?

Question

*I am asking this under this section because I always get good answers to questions about my pregnancy and I didn't know what other section to ask it under.*

I watch two little girls ages 2 and 3 (almost 4) and today the 3 year old said "my daddy hurt my pee pee." I was shocked to hear this so I asked her again and she repeated it. I tried to ask her more questions like how he hurt her, but she didn't really tell me anything else. So my question is what do I need to do? I really don't want to start drama and lose my job (especially with a baby on the way) if this is nothing because I do know that little kids have imaginations and can make up things, but I also don't want to let this go. Is there somewhere that I can take her by myself, not being her mother, to get her checked out with out them contacting the parents. Obviously if I contact the parents about this they will fire me and nothing will be done. I am just really confused as to what my options are and what my responsibility as their caregiver is. Should I just ignore it unless she brings it up again?

Answer 1

you do need to contact officials, they are trained to detect if this is the truth or not

Answer 2

Oh I'm so sorry.. I would sit her down and explain to her how it's important that she tells you exactly how her daddy hurt her.. If she goes into detail I would definite report them to child services asap!

Answer 3

Bring her to a pediatritian as soon as possible.  They recieve special training in child sexual abuse.  They will know what questions to ask and what steps to take, in what is best for the child, based on physical and psychological examination.

Answer 4

You HAVE to contact CPS.

I don't know if the law is the same for your job (I would assume so,) but as a teacher, I have the responsibility to report ANYTHING suspicious.  If it turns out the child really has been abused, and it comes out that you suspected something but never followed through...you could land yourself in a lot of trouble.

The only other suggestion I can give is that you just fork out the money to take her to a minor emergency clinic and have her checked out.  Of course, if you show up with a potentially abused child....you may end up talking to the cops or CPS at the medical clinic anyway.

Answer 5

I can understand you not wanting to lose your job, but this seems very serious.  I don't think you can bring her anywhere without being the parent... or having the parents consent to be there... Maybe you can talk to the mother and explain to her what her daughter said to you.  It may be nothing, but do you really want to take that chance... what if it were one of your kids... I'm sure you would want to know.  

Good luck!  

Answer 6

try using a doll or toy to ask questions, get her point to the parts that she has been touched or even point out what he did or part of the body, kids usually relate a little easier this way. Children do not say things like this as a part of their imagination, it is not a normal part of learning or teaching even by a parent, It generally means this is a possibility that it happened to her or her sister, the more information you have the better, then ring the police and they will contact the appropriate people to deal with the situation, do you have a doctor you can talk to?

Answer 7

All things happen for a reason. No matter your situation with this you'd be concerned about losing your job. But the livelihood of this child is more important at this point.

I don't know any children at that age would make up a statement like that.

I'd call the police on the non emergency line and ask which direction to go in. You have to be careful in asking questions because you don't want to lead her with her answers. You could get a doll however and ask her to show you how daddy hurt her and where.  If you decide not to say anything pay close attention to how she starts playing with dolls.

As someone whose been abused and a future mother a  lil girl I would want you to come to me about this, BUT I WOULD REALLY UNDERSTAND YOUR SEEKING HELP FOR MY CHILD. Unless I'm guilty too.

Answer 8

Sounds like you should contact the police and have this child checked out.  What is more important your job or a child who maybe being sexually abused?

Answer 9

I would talk to just the mom. Say something like " I'm not sure what to make of this, but your daughter told me that her daddy hurt her pee pee" I don't think that any mother would let her child get hurt or molested knowingly. She may go in to denial and you may lose your job, but at least you did something for the poor little girl!

Answer 10

I would keep trying to ask her questions about it and see if you can get any more out of her. But regardless if you do or not, you need to take what she says seriously and its your reponsibility as a caregiver, to report any suspiscion of child abuse to authorities. You could take her to see a doctor, they will for sure report it to the police as its required by them to do that as medical professionals.

Answer 11

hello,

you need to write everything down in a note book date, time what was said where etc. you will need to docoment every conversation you have with the child.

i would also phone social sevices for some advice.

they will help you with the next stage .

good luck

Answer 12

the only thing you can do is contact Child protective services and have them investigate.. the call is anonymous so they will not know you did it but keep talking to the little girl

Answer 13

MOST DEFINITELY CONTACT CHILD SERVICES.

I'm sorry that there is a chance you could get fired, but at least you can have peace of mind that if there is something going on, you tired your best to help make it stop.

Answer 14

Don't ask her anymore questions and report it to CPS. CPS workers are 'trained' to ask the questions. If you start telling her right now that 'it's bad' or 'nobody should be touching you there' the little girl may shy away and not say anything anymore.

I don't know if you baby sit these children at home or if you are licensed but many daycare workers are mandated child abuse reporters and MUST call CPS to file a report. If you are not mandated you should still call. CPS will launch an investigation and if there's nothing to be concerned then the case closes within 30 days. Again, it's your moral obligation to file a report.

Good Luck!

Ps. I know it's difficult to report especially if you are depending on that money but I'm sure you can find another job. Think about the horrific effects on the babies if no one reports it!

Answer 15

I think you should sit the mother down and just tell her what the little girl said to you, and just explain to her your concern. Regardless of whether or not it's true, the little girl needs to know that she shouldnt be saying this to people if it is not true. If it is true then the mother really does need to know about this so that the correct actions can be taken. I think that if you dont say something to the mother and she eventually finds out that something happend to her daughter and that maybe you knew about it and didnt do anything about it that she will be FURIOUS at you and you will lose your job regardless.

Anyways, isn't the safety of this little girl more important than your babysitting job? I think so...besides you might not lose your job over this anyways. As long as you have their childrens best interest at heart i think you shouldnt worry about losing your job. the mother should understand.

Answer 16

i would call children services first, and ask what you should do. if you call the police first, all they will do is take a report, and quesiton the parents. you could also confront the parents about it too.

definatley don't wait to do something about this.  

Answer 17

I caught my son's p***s skin in his p.j zippers once.  He told my Mom I had hurt his doodle.  I know horrible Mom I should have been more careful.  I'm not taking this guys side but kids don't always explain themselves right sometimes.  And if he was molesting that baby I would go to the authority's with no hesitation.  Just be careful and not jump the gun.

Answer 18

I'm a childcare worker, and we never jumped to conclusions, as children as you said, have a big imagination.

What you need t do is continue to chat to this little girl, and maybe just have a chat to the mother. Dont make a big deal of it, just bring it up in conversation as me as a mother, even if it was my partner, I would want to know.

If you still feeling like the little girl is being abused after you have done this, then yes report. No offense, but a job is nothing compared to what the little girl is going through if its all true

Answer 19

contact the police or child services today.

You will be able to get another nanny job so don't worry about that.

DO NOT ignore it. If it is happening, help this girl now so it does not continue and cause her more damage.

This puts you in a crappy position, noone wants to deal with this. It is a serious issue. But remember you are doing the right thing. This little girl trusts you and came to you for help.