Serious Sister Problems Please Help

Question

My sister has had hormone problems since ever, she started her period when she was nine was a 32dd when she was ten and now she's 13 and a 32H she hates it and finally Dr. Charles Nduka is giving her a breast reduction - three days before my birthday.My mum said it's not going to happen but i know that everyone is going to come round and forget that i exsist. The worst thing is that she's really horrible to me about it like not even sister rivalty just meannesss and then as soon as i say something she cries and says that she's going through to much to think and then i get told off.I am still always there for her and always will be because she's my sister and i love her but as soon as i even joke about one thing then she's horrible again please don't leave any nasty comments because i've had this since i was 7 and it's been four years now and i cant do it.

Answer 1

Your sister is used to being the centre of attention and whenever it seems that you get something that has brought her attention in the past, she resents it because she sees you as trying to steal her thunder.

Rather than have your birthday celebration so close to her operation, here's what I suggest: have it a few weeks later, and make it into a real party about you. Your argument for this can be as follows: you were thinking of her, and wanted her to heal up, and be able to enjoy your party as much as you will. Then she will have the attention she wants around the time of your birthday, and you can set things up for yourself in such a way that she cannot complain about it.  

Answer 2

it really sounds like she maybe jealous of the fact that you are not having the problems that she is.  This is a big thing in her life and she os prob.  feeling ike no one else can relate expecally her younger  sister.  se loves you and she wll come around.  just give her her space and give er time.

Answer 3

Its hard being the younger sister and I guess you feel like you're always in her shadow, especially as she started developing so early and has had hormone problems. She's been the 'special' one and you've been the 'other' one. I feel for you, I really do.

Me and my sister had a lot of problems when we were growing up. I was the older one and I know that, without meaning to, I often made things hard for her.

I understand that you don't think that it's fair on you sometimes, but she has had a lot of hardship too. I bet she gets bullied or teased about her chest and she probably feels very low about her body sometimes. Add to that the effects of her hormone problems. I mean grown women feel like they're going temporarily insane because of their hormones sometimes, so imagine how much worse it is when you are young and don't know how to handle it properly.

It's possible that she's also a bit of a drama queen and likes to make a fuss about herself sometimes. It can be annoying, but you can't change people who are like that, you just have to get used to the way they are and learn to ignore it.

I understand too that you are worried about your birthday. Have you explained to your mum why you feel the way you do, and explained that you're not just trying to be difficult. Is there any way that you can get some time just for yourself on that day, even if it's only a couple of hours when your mum takes you shopping or something. I'm sure you can come to some kind of compromise so that you still get a special day.

Bear in mind that your sister will have just had a major operation and will be in a h**l of a lot of pain. She might just spend the day asleep or out of it on painkillers. The people that come round to see you on your birthday might go and see her too to make sure she is okay. Why don't you make sure you are included by taking them to her, or asking her to open some of your presents.

I know it's hard but I promise things will improve. As you both get older you will find more things in common and you will get closer. And things could be an awful lot worse.

Keep your chin up and try to have a great birthday.  

Answer 4

wow this is a realy hard question to answer....Just let her know how much you love her and how much you care and if u get told off by ur parents then tell them what u were doing and u ment no offense to her.

No offense i just couldn't help it Do you have a picture of her?

Answer 5

Maybe you should support her and she will see you really care about her, that might make her treat you better. You shouldnt post pictures of her up on the internet because it will only make things worse if she finds out.

Answer 6

well maybe u can just ignore it. occupied yourself in something else that will take all your time that way u dont have to deal with it. still be nice 2 your sister becuase like u said shes your sister :)

Answer 7

You and her have been spending too much time together.

Try spending time alone do things by yourself like read a book or watch TV. Then do something nice for your sister like buy her a chocolate bar or make her a snack, ask her how she is and if she looks sad give her a hug and tell her that you love her,

I know it's hard, I've had problems with my family in the past.

The way around it isn't to keep telling them off and that they are always doing mean things to you.

You have to forgive them and remove the resentment from your heart towards them.

Be nice and polite to them and they should do the same back.

Avoid jokes that annoy them even if it is only jokes.

I f she is still mean to you for no reason, tell her she has to try to improve her attitude.

And remembe you and her are still only children when you are adults you will be able to improve your attitudes much better.