Sexual Harrassment at work?

Question

There is a collegue of mine that keeps saying inappropriate things to me, hugs me and always wants to talk about what i like in the bedroom. I try to avoid him but he follows me and i want to say something but he is in a Managerial position and im afraid no-one will believe me.

I have only known him for about a year and found out he is a distant cousin.

He tells me he wishes he wasnt married and i wasnt in a relationship so we could run away together.

It makes me feel VERY UNCOMFORTABLE and i have told my partner!

My partner who is extremely angry with him wants to approach him but im worried it will effect my work and i could get fired.

I dont know if i should report it as i have no evidence, its just my word against his.....and my boss knows we are related.

Any advice you would recommend?

Answer 1

Yup just tell him that he needs to stop this or else you will report him to the owner or you will file a complaint. Say it nice one time. if he continues, you just go ahead and complain. no job in the world is worth to be harassed like this. I'm surprised how you have the Patience I would kick him in the XX long time ago. You can find another job but at least you will get justice!

Answer 2

you should talk to HR first off record, understand your company policy and procedures in this kind of behavior. sexual harrassment is wrong and immoral and illegal, stand up for your self, this guy is a pig, he desirve to be punished .\good luck

Answer 3

hi

please keep you self respect first and job on second place.

tell him firmly about your feelings, but in private. or  you can even slap him in private.

try to record the conversation on mobile or small tape recorder. share with  any of your close friends at work.

take care

Answer 4

Had this happen....report it and they have to investigate

Answer 5

Don't take that c**p. Go to the next level up, tell them everything in detail that happened. It doesn't matter if you don't have evidence, ALL work places have a zero tolerance thing for this kind of thing. Don't take matters into your own hands, please tell the general manager. You should not be uncomfortable at any point going to work, that's ridiculous. Please get help as soon as possible! I hope everything gets taken care of. Good luck!

Answer 6

DO NOT HAVE YOUR PARTNER GO TO HIM.

Chances are if they do you could get fired or your partner could get violent and maybe get into trouble with the law.

What you should do is tell the guy that you are uncomfortable with the way he talks to you, and that if he continues you'll have to report him.

Answer 7

Document every single word!!! what time..what date...location..an anyone that may have overheard confirm an document,document...

i worked with all men figured none of would wanna work with me,an they didn't before i turned him in as the situation grew...yet to my surprise,when they called him into HR, i had documented every word

and he admitted to all of it,he couldn,t beleive he did anything wrong!?

they fired him immediately. it took a little while for people to stop gossiping an treating me like the devil, but i was advised not to respond

to questions or gossip to just stay silent. not to confirm, or defend any thing at all.there is a legal order to silence to protect all partys.. like you,i struggled with what to do,he would isolate me away from people so i had no witnesses. i called HR on my day off an asked if i could be mmoved to another dept,without bidding out. i expressed i would just have to quit if i couldn't , i wouldn't turn him in,he had a 6 mth old baby!

she asked me to come in right then,i went,we just talked i told her everything,showed her my disorganized very scribbled writing ... I was really scared unsure of myself, vulnerable,i didn't wanna be misunderstood too! it effected every single min.of my life, untill that day! when they escorted him off premis i was there,our eyes met an i for the first time in months i wasn't dreading the next day! an the fear his behavior created in me went away. follow you own gut,do whats best for you.my company was very supportive,responsive an effective...That surprised me the most,an gave the nightmare closure! THATS WHY THERE ARE LAWS in place against any tolerance. confide in your HR people ask them to help you decide what to do,they will appreciate your discretion an communication.last thing they want is a lawsuit,i hope i've helped,you deserve a safe inviroment,you mental health depends on it. iam with you,as well as thousands of others,just imagine us all there when you face your fear,u are not alone! intellegence-innitiates, ignorance-reacts! to you,love an respect...grace

Answer 8

have u tried asking him to stop? cos if u do not react in anyway on his behavior he gets this idea u like it. i would talk to him first.  

Answer 9

Your silence is actually encouraging him. First of all you must warn him and then report. If this is not possible then avoid him.

Tell him clearly that you don't like such things or this type of discussion, you can be strict but polite, otherwise things will go out of hand.

Answer 10

If you don't want to get anyone involved, but want to keep your job, You need to approach this manager alone and tell him firmly that he needs to quit saying things that make you embarrassed. Tell him that it makes you uncomfortable because you have a partner and think things of that nature should stay private. Just say "Please, I have to ask you to stop saying stuff like that to me. It's not appropriate". Just give him that stern "and I really mean it" look. That should be enough. If it continues, then he is obviously not smart enough to keep himself out of trouble and it shouldn't be that hard for you to prove that he is a pervert.