Sexual harassment at work, please help!?

Question

I work in a restaurant, and i have a problem with the chef.

nearly everyday he makes me feel uncomfortable, as he does things like putting his arms around my waist when i am cleaning the glasses etc..and also comes up behind me and tries to massage my shoulders...those are just examples of what he does.

I know its not just me he does it to either, as a few of the other waitresses have asked me if he does the same, as he does it to them.

i dont wnat to mention it to my boss, as i live in a very small town, and if i left the job for this reason, i'm worried i wont be hired anywhere else, and also there are no other jobs around at the moment, and i need the money, so cant leave this job....what can i do to make him stop doing this, as its making me feel really uncomfortable, and i have started dreading going to work because of him!

Answer 1

As a female, you also have a responsibility to tell ANY male (inside or outside of work)    NO!!!!

By remaining silent, to me, it sends a message that you are accepting to it.

He is not your boss, you have never once told this guy to stop it, you don't report to him....this is simply flirting and it's not your boss's job if you are unable to assert yourself.

Now, if you TOLD HIM NO and it continued, then that is another thing.

However, if I told that chef No and he touched me again, I would say in a very, very loud voice the next time he did...." Will you please take your hands off of me, I told you to stop."

I guarantee he will.

But YOU have a responsibility to tell him No.

Answer 2

If that was me, I would of done punched him, but...

Since it's your job, and all. Tell him you have a boyfriend next time he does that.

Answer 3

Be as polite as possible and ask him to stop, tell him you feel uncomfortable with what he is doing, if he doesnt want to take you seriously tell him you  feel you will have no option than to report him for sexual harassment x

Answer 4

don,t stop him and he will continue,tell your boss,but remember one thing,your boss can get a waitress far more easily than he can replace a chef.Business is business,its a hard world.If i were you i would scream and shout the place down calling him all the dirty lecherous b******s under the sun,this will put him off for sure,no man likes to be known as a sexual perv who cannot keep his hands to himself.Another way,especially in a small place,is to ask the advice of the local police patrol man,once you have done this,he will be kept in mind by the police at least,even if they do not act on it.

Answer 5

Then you have to politely ask him to stop it.  Or failing that you have no option but to report it to the Boss.

Answer 6

You really need to talk to  your boss regardless of what you perceive the repercussions to be.  Your boss is at risk of a law suit if and that is not fair to him if he has no knowledge.

Answer 7

Next time it happens say something to him and ask him to stop.  You are doing nothing wrong so he would lose his job and not you.  If this does not work make a point next time it happens. Say something very clear and loud so other people can hear...

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF ME".

- trust me, people will look and he will fear reprisals.

Make sure other people hear and see you when these things happen and make sureeveryone else does the same as you.

If this doesnt work you really should start to see your boss about it.  He has not right to make your life a misery

Answer 8

Nicely tell the chef that you have a boyfriend (even if you dont) and you dont feel its acceptable to be touched..

or if you do not want to lie, you can always just tell him to stop touching you, but in a friendly way..

Because he's going to keep doing it until you inform him that you dont want him too.

Because he probably thinks its okay...

Answer 9

Sorry babe just can't resist the apron is all.