She doesn't really want to get married!!!?

Question

I want to know what you guys think. Does my god sister want to get married or what!. She told us in April she was getting married in August, which left her no time to prepare. Her cousin got married late last year so she had all her contacts in place. Her cousin continued to call her people to get things rolling. My GS had a church ,a reception site, a car service, a band and everything besides a dress. She called a meeting in May asking her bridemaids to help out. We gave her suggestions which really she seemed uninterested in. She really never participated in the planning. She then called the wedding off that next month saying she was stressed and confused.(She had everything in place). She then said she was going to elope and get married in Miami or the Virgin Islands. I knew that was a lie because her fiance is totally family oriented so that wouldn't fly with him! So anyway, after all that she then comes back to me and says she is going to have a destination wedding in the Bahamas!. I am at the point where I want to say f this. I want to tell her she is afraid to get married and she just enjoys saying she is just for the heck of it. What should I do!. I am not going to spend $2000.00 to be in her wedding when I am not sure if she wants to get married int he first place.

Answer 1

sounds like she just wants to be married and doesnt give too much thought into the day itself.  Nothing Wrong with that -and think about the stress of planning a wedding in such a short time. I Planned mine in three months, and graduated university at the same time, so i can say from experience that she is over stressed and jsut doesnt care about details. I know by month 2 - i shure didnt !

Answer 2

If she brings up the destination wedding then tell her that it sounds great and she should send you photos.  You shouldn't pay 2 grand to go to a wedding you don't support.  

Answer 3

I agree with basketcase but I'd leave out the 'cancelling one time too many' (unless your not afraid to tell her the absolute truth) I would just say to her 'I can't really afford to make any big commitments financially at this time (and with the crumbling economy that's a very valid excuse) I'd love to be in your wedding but things are just so tight right now'

Answer 4

Sounds like she wants to get married but doesn't want a wedding.

Answer 5

Yeah it does sound a little suspect..I certainly wouldnt spend that much money on her wedding because it just doesnt sound like she will stick to it and the last thing you want is to be left with a debt after the marriage has ended...  

Answer 6

It sounds like she is a drama queen.  I don't know if I can take someone like her seriously.  When you take what she says seriously, you will just exhaust yourself emotionally.  If I were you, I would not attend her wedding.   Like everybody else, I cannot/would not spend such amount of money for a situation like this.  Just leave her alone and let her live in her soap opera world and move on with your life.    

Answer 7

I was thinking she sounded pretty flaky to me too, and that was before I read that she had been engaged before, and broke off the engagement to be with the current fiance.  I'd be VERY wary as well.  

I wouldn't tell her that you think she's afraid to get married or anything, simply because she probably won't even listen.  What I WOULD do is tell her that while you'd love to be in her wedding, she's scheduled and cancelled them on you 1 time too many, and you simply do not have the money at this time to spend being a bridesmaid in a wedding you're not certain will happen.  

Good luck!