She doesn't want to war a training bra?

Question

my daughter doesn't like dresses, dolls, lip gloss,getting her head done or girly things. she also doesn't like or want to wear a bra? how do i get her to wear a training bra and help her remember to alway wear a pad when she is going through her cycle. i told her away bible study camp away for one wk she doesn't want to leave for one week so i didn't register her for it.

Answer 1

Explain to her WHY she need them

If sher doesn't want to  then let her walk around with sagging b***s and a red stain on her ***,

that should smarten her up!

Answer 2

Well, the things in the first sentence don't matter. Some girls don't start liking that sort of thing until 17+, some never do, and that's OK. The other two issues are important though, you just have to help her make it part of her routine. Although I imagine after the first time she stains through her clothes she'll remember about the pads, poor thing (which is what will happen, if she doesn't make it routine now!). The training bra part is harder, and I wish you luck!

Answer 3

Who says she needs a bra?  Bras are to provide support..  if she doesnt have much to support yet, then she doesnt need them.  As she develops more, she will come to terms that she needs one..  let her select the bra she wants.  When I was a teen, I preferred sports bras, as they were more comfortable and easier to put on.

When she bleeds thru her clothes a few times, she will remember to wear a pad.

Answer 4

Well, if she's already had her period, just have her mark down the day on the calendar, and then remind her when it gets to be near a month after that her period's about to come again. Once she gets it, and once her first pair of pants get stained, she likely won't forget - if she's had it and she's still forgetting just remind her to wear a pad or tampon, and she'll learn fast.

As far as the bra goes, don't worry about it - when she needs one, she'll want one (and since it's a training bra you're talking about, she doesn't need one) and wear it when she's in public.

Don't worry about the dresses, lip gloss, or whatever, either. When she grows up and starts wanting to attract romantic attention she'll start doing things like getting her hair done or wearing makeup in order to be more attractive.

As far as camp, don't push it. Maybe you could start by taking her to a day camp, and letting her see how much fun it is, then next year asking her if she would like to stay at camp for nights, too? And make sure it's something she's interested in, probably like sports camp or horse riding camp, to make her want to spend the week away from you.

Answer 5

Mam, she will eventually start to be the young lady she is,and maybe wearing a training bra, embarrasses   her, why didn't you register her for Bible study camp? Because she didn't want to leave for a week? Mam, it would be good for her to be in Bible study week, and do you have a book on menastration for her to read? You can get them at your doctor's offices, at health clinics, so she herself can read and see why she will need to wear a pad when her cycle starts; does she understand about  her cycle?And why it is neccessary for her to wear the pad?Soon enough mam, she'll be wear dresses,playing with dolls,lip gloss,getting her hair done,and ALL GIRLY THINGS, please let her be herself, yes get her the book, with illustrations for her periods;mam, they grow up so fast one minute she's your BABY GIRL, next minute she's YOUR TOMBOY,next she's YOUR YOUNG LADY, in dresses  and lip gloss, getting her hair done every week, next minute she's YOUR GROWN UP DAUGHTER, GRADUATED, MARRIED, WITH KIDS OF HER OWN, and you'll think back ernestly how did she grow up so fast? Where did the time go? Ya know? So, besides the pad/ period let her be herself, soon enough she'll be wearing those dresses, lip gloss,etc. Trust God He knows when she will turn into a lady!He's never wrong! Trust Him!In some cases it would be wonderful to be able to keep our children smaller, but we can't they  grow up so fast.When she thinks its time to wear a bra, she will, she'll blossom out like a beautiful rose! It would be great for her to go Bible study, it would be good for her/you if she went to the camp, for the week.

Answer 6

Does she NEED to wear a bra?  Honestly?  If she doesn't really need to wear a bra, what's the fuss?  If she just needs a little coverage, then a sports bra should be just fine -- covers things up a bit, provides a little gentle support.  Get her a sports bra and stop obsessing over the training bra.

Regarding her period:  Has she started her period, or are you just worrying needlessly? She might HATE wearing a pad, and would prefer tampons.  Have you talked to her about it?  Active girls, especially, find the pad to be a nuisance.  A tampon, with perhaps a very light panty liner to keep her underwear fresh on heavy days, would be a good solution.

Re: Camp.  Frankly, Bible study camp wouldn't thrill me, either, so I can sorta sympathize with her. :-)   If you want her to have a camping experience, maybe a camp that had something that she was interested in, like a sports camp?  Or check around your town -- lots of churches, etc., have day camps with sports, etc. that she might enjoy. You didn't say if she had ever spent that long away from home before -- she may be afraid of being homesick.  

You sound puzzled by your daughter -- she may NEVER be interested in the girly stuff.  Please learn to accept her as she is, not as some image of a "perfect girl".

Answer 7

Well... This is normal your child is obviously a tomboy and that is great! But she needs a bra and im sorry she doesnt like it but. Tell her sometthing simple like if you dont wear this training bra or any bra at that than you shall sag my dear, your b*****s will hang low and you wount have your tomboy fugure any longer . So if you want to stay a tomboy and not a girlie type of girl wear this bra! No sagging allowed! The pad thing assure her that its awesome that she has an opinion so you dont try to seem like your being demanding but tell her that is she doesnt wear a pad when her cycle begains she will be stinky and smelly and tell her she wont be boy smellly she will be fish smelly and that isnat good because this will cause humilation which will not make you a tomboy it will make you a humiltiated girl

so make her realize what happens when she refuses to wear the training bra or wear a pad also let her know she will have dots red blobs of blood gushing from her pants so let her know this and dont be too demanding be happy dont lose your trust!

Answer 8

It doesn't matter that she doesn't like girly things. It sounds like she's a tomboy. Don't pressure her into liking girly things, let her be herself.

However, it is very important that you make sure she is wearing a bra and a pad. Tell her that it's part of growing up and something that all women have to do. Growing up can be scary. It was scary at me for me at that age. She'll come around.

Answer 9

oh I remember being a tomboy too!  A good solution is a sports bra.  I always felt better in a sports bra because they didnt feel too feminine and I could still do what I liked doing.  It was a compromise with my mother.  One thing about the cycle too is talking to her about what happens without.  Help her understand that this is just a fact of life and no matter her lifestyle it is still important to take care of herself.

Answer 10

What about sports bras?

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.d...

This is what my 12 year old daughter wears and her size is about 32 B. I do go a size up and get her 34 and it is comfy and more like a mini-tank top but still offers enough support assuming your daughter is not huge or anything.

Pad/cycle -- it may take a little while. My daughter does okay wearing the pads but she sometimes leaves them in her underwear and puts them in the hamper instead of pulling them out and throwing them away when she changes.

Camp: would she go to some other kind of camp? If she wants to go away or you think it would be good for her you still could call the camp and ask if they have an opening last minute.

As far as not liking girly things -- that is no big deal. Accept her the way she is.

But if she needs a bra she needs to be wearing one in public. I would try the sports bras above. They are inexpensive and very comfortable and my daughter will be wearing them until she gets big enough to need more structured support.

Answer 11

K...are you the mom, or a sister? You TELL her to wear a training bra. She doesn't run nothing. And tell her it's nasty for a little girl to be walking around bleeding on herself, and wearing old stale pads.

Why does she do that? How's her attitude? How old is she? Maybe she don't want to feel like a girl. I dunno. Do you ask her why she doesn't do this stuff? Would help if we knew.

Answer 12

the part with the pad, i can understand. but making somebody wear a training bra when they want to is kind of tough. you can't make her dress up girly, you can't make her wear lip gloss, you can't make her do girly things. she has to want to do that herself.

Answer 13

I have a little sister who is a tom boy too. She is so pretty. My mom ripped her a new one for so long.I finally had a talk with her. I think sometime they get so embarrassed and dont want to grow up.Just monitor her a little closer. My mom and I did that with my sister and she got tired of it because she didnt like to talk about it.So she started doing it on her own. Just write down the day of her cycle and check everyday she is wearing a bra.I know that sounds so stupid.It worked for my sister. Its hard growing up

Answer 14

I am 18 almost 19 and I still am not a fan of dresses, dolls never interested me, never liked getting my hair done, I like to get my hair cut now but usually just hair cuts and about the only girly thing I do is make-up and clothes.

I didn't wear a real bra till 6th or 7th grade. It was all sports bras. Get her a sports bra, she might like that better. I know I did.

As for the pad issue, when I started, I hated pads and having to carry them.

Let her try tampons, much more smaller and easier to carry around without anyone noticing.