Shocked by British men's choice..what is WRONG WITH MEN IN EUROPE?

Question

I'm a college student here in the U.S and this summer I did the "studying abroad" like most universities have. There were about 45 students this summer from the business school in my University.

I'm 23 years and I consider myself a good looking girl because I take care of myself. I do not look down on others or races. I'm obvious white, 115 pounds, 5"5" tall, 36 bust. In college i have a lot of guys going after me and my friends.

STUDY ABROAD SUMMER:

This summer the study abroad was in london. We were so excited about being in london and meeting good looking british guys. To our surprise, we found that european men preferred to go after black women. This was shocking and such an eye opener to me and my white girl friends.

We went to pubs, clubs, restaurants. lounges and some other fancy places. It was the same. They bought drinks for them. Thats not to say that white men did not hit on white girls just that seemed to be on equal grounds. Which is good but surprising because this does not usually happen in america.

OUR GROUP:

our group of girls had 3 white girls and 2 African American girls. I'm not racist. Even in school this is our usual circle of friends. We travelled together in Europe and every where else.

WHAT HAPPENED:

Every time we went out, the british white guys would mostly be after the African American girls. My African American girls are also pretty. It's just that it shocked us the white American girls. We thought, we would be the first pick. I guess we are used to the white American guys not appraoching black girls, I thought it would be the same there.

LEARNING EXPERIENCE:

I found that in europe a white girl is not the most wanted girl. I learned tthat white and black girls have equal chances when it comes to men there. We found that there are many white men and black women couples in the U.K as there are black men and white women couples. Unlike in the U.S where there much more blcak men and white women couples compared to white men and black women couples

By the time we went out for the 4th times, we the white girls knew it was fair game for the men for both black and white girls.

I WAS HURT NOT because I'm white but because there were some guy there that i would have liked to have spent some time with but instead they chose to get to know an African America girl. I would have felt the same way had they chosen an other white girl over me

CONCLUSION:

Not all but from what we experienced we learned that european men view women of all races in the same way or view black women in better light than white american men. This happened when we went to France, Ireland, Scotland, Switerland, Italy and Germany.

Bare in mind that there are a lot black british people in the U.K. I have lived with black people for as long as we have.

I had a good time though. I learned a lot about other people and culture.

MY QUESTION:

Why is it different here. In america, i'm a 100% certain that if I were to walk in a place with only white men and I walked in with some African American girls that a white man would appraoch a black woman at least not in public or in front of a white girl.

What makes a white american man different from a white european man?

WE LEARNED THAT RACE DOES NOT SHAPE BEHAVIOR BUT CULTURE DOES.

Answer 1

*Sighs*

Europe is a big place. You make very sweeping statements about "European" men when in actual fact you visited one little city in one little country. This makes the men English, not European.

Maybe you just chose to go to the wrong bars? I'm actually still trying to work out why the h**l it matters so much that your friends got picked over you. Sounds a teensy bit like sour grapes, to be honest.

Answer 2

They don't get any more English than me. I'm an English man living in london and there is truth to your statement.

You still have white people that will not date black people and you still have black people that will not date white people.

From what I have heard from my american friends, yes we british men go for what attracts us, it does not matter if the girl is green, red, black or white. If I like what I see i go for her. Her race does not cross my mind. I have dated both white and black women so have most of the english men I know.

Yes in the U.K I pretty much much say it's fair game.

I don't know about you over there. A woman is a woman PERIOD.

Answer 3

Hmmm, you claim not to be racist but you certainly do sound like you are.

EXPECTING that you'd be chosen first on the sole basis of being white-and then to out yourself to the whole world.  

Well it really shouldn't be all that surprising, WW in the US have been indoctrinated to believe that they are the end all be all.

Answer 4

Sounds like haterism to me.  Half of my family lives in Africa or the UK.  But I was raised here in the US.  In the UK, if a man sees a woman he finds hot, he's going after her.  Period.  

There happens to be a lot of very attractive black women in the UK (and everywhere really), its just that they have tossed the stigma that it is necessary for your skintones match in order for you to hit the sheets together or have a relationship. lol

Needless to say my cousins and etc have no problem getting a date from men, black or white.  No shame in it, but why do you look at it as it is some kind of knock on you?  People take others preferences in dating FAR too personally.

Answer 5

What exactly did you mean by "My African American girls are also pretty. "? MY African American girls? Do you own them? Did you adopt them as children? Exactly how are they YOUR girls???

And are they "girls" or are they women?

Also, why are you 100% sure that a white man will not approach a black woman in public or in front of a white woman? Is that some sort of unwritten rule that the rest of the world isn't aware of? Will he approach her in private or when white women aren't around? Sounds a lot like white men used to do during the era of slavery when they secretly lusted after black women. Many black women were forcibly raped and could not stop the advances of these men who would approach them in private and even deny their attraction in front of their white wives. The fascination and the sexual urges towards black women by white men isn't as new a phenomenon as you may think.

White women being puzzled or angered by it is nothing new either.

I'm still curious though as to why you're 100% sure a white man wouldn't approach a black woman in public or in front of a white woman. I would seriously love to hear your further explanation here.

Based upon your observations and your admission of how pretty "your girls" are, a better question might have been what's wrong with American white men who have been passing these pretty black women up all this time?

Just to satisfy my curiosity, do you and your white girlfriends ever get approached in public by black men? If so, do you find that just as odd or is that perfectly normal and acceptable to you?

Would love to know what "your" black girls think about your question.

Sounds like I'm jumping on you and I am. Not to be mean, but to point out how racist your post actually does come across. You may want to check that if you're going to continue hanging out with black people and don't want to appear racist.

Answer 6

It could be that Europeans are much more open to other races and cultures,and more willing to get to know a person,and are able to look beyond race.It sounds like  more of a personal preference by European men,to me though.

Answer 7

you obviously spent a LOT of time putting your evidence together but you are wrong.

I think it was a simple case of some of your friends looking good and some of you didn't.  W

hite men in London or anywhere in the world DO NOT have a preference for black women.

White men, like any group of males, have a preference for ATTRACTIVE women.

Answer 8

yeah, many americans are still racist from what i know. although black women are usually very hot, they wouldn't hold an advantage over the white ones for me cause obviously there's fit white ones as well. don't think what you're saying is true

Answer 9

If you are trying to make your question seem so unbiased and unracist then why did you put your query as "what is WRONG WITH MEN IN EUROPE?"

Answer 10

You hit it with the culture angle. Skin color prejudice is something of a relatively recent thing in humans. The prejudice for most of human history was cultural. Those who were slaves and other lesser status were given less consideration. Because of the accidents of history and developments of power, it evolved that darker peoples tended to become the lower status folks, particularly in the Americas, most particularly in the north. It wasn't a far leap to color prejudice. Racism certainly exists in the UK and Europe. Tolerance is not universal. Look to North Afiricans in France and eastern Meds in some other countries. They didn't, however, go through a period of outright official legal bias.

As you no doubt noticed, there are fewer Black people in Europe. In the absence of institutionalized race bias, there's a chance to be exotic. Seeing these thing is, of course, why you experience other places.  

Answer 11

The UK is an established multicultural nation and has been since the early 1900's. We've long been open to immigration. According to 2005 estimates, 69.6% of the seven million people in London are classed as White British (58.2%), White Irish (2.6%) and "Other White" (8.8%) 12.9% of people are Asian, including Indian (mainly Punjabi, Hindi, Tamil & Gujarati), Pakistani, Bangladeshi (Bengali) and "Other Asian" (mostly Sri Lankan). 10.8% of people are Black, 3.4% are of mixed race; 1.4% are Chinese; 1.9% of people belong to another ethnic group (mostly Latin American - an estimated 60,000 Brazilians reside in London, Filipino, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese and other Oriental countries).

In January 2005, a survey claimed that there were more than 300 languages spoken in London.

That's why we don't harbour the same prejudices as are in the US.

Answer 12

I don't know where you live in the U.S...maybe the southern states. I live in New York City and it's the same here as you experienced in London. I have white men approach me all the time. America is changing, it may be slow but changing.

I have heard this before though by some friends who went to europe when I was in college. I could not afford to go when I was in college but my friends said they were surprised at how many white men in london wanted to be with them.

It's good to know that there are places where people do not allow race to stop them from going after what and who they like. New York is the same way.

White men here just go after us with out question. I have never believed any woman has a better chance then me.

If a white girl gets a man I want, I never blame it on me being black and her being white. I just say"maybe she is more of what he  likes or she has what he wants than me".

You better stop thinking that white men are just for white girls. You better throw that out or you are going to be hurt more in the future.

Answer 13

Despite your many claims of not being a bigot,  you gave yourself away in your first line:

"what is WRONG WITH MEN IN EUROPE?"

This question insinuates that you believe that there is something wrong with these men if they prefer your black friends over you and your other white friend.  If you didn't believe yourself to be superior in some way, you wouldn't have phrased your question in this manner and you would not have been insulted when you weren't approached first.  Perhaps you came across as being too eager or needy, or maybe you just have a bad attitude.  It may have nothing at all to do with race.  Just because you're bigoted doesn't mean that others are behaving in the manner that they are because they're bigoted.

Answer 14

i pretty much live in london n u r so wrong!

Answer 15

it's just like the US, but switch black women with asian women.  lol

Answer 16

"We were so excited about being in london and meeting good looking british guys. To our surprise, we found that european men preferred to go after black women. This was shocking and such an eye opener to me and my white girl friends."

You were excited about being in London and then what...you changed your mind b/c you weren't the center of attention? And could it be that European men didn't prefer black women but that ANY attention they gave black women was dumbfounding to you b/c you don't expect them to ever get any attention? Perhaps you were wallowing in such shock and self-pity that you didn't notice that guys were hitting on you too?

"We went to pubs, clubs, restaurants. lounges and some other fancy places. It was the same. They bought drinks for them."

Oh how dare they!!

"Thats not to say that white men did not hit on white girls just that seemed to be on equal grounds."

You just had an epiphany. White women aren't the fairest of them all :(

"Which is good but surprising because this does not usually happen in america."

It doesn't sound like you think it was a good thing. It's good though that you realize that the jacked up way things are in America do not really apply to the rest of the world, thank God.

"We thought, we would be the first pick. I guess we are used to the white American guys not appraoching black girls, I thought it would be the same there."

At least you are being honest and do realize that you considered yourself in some way superior to your black friends even if you don't consider yourself racist.

"I would have felt the same way had they chosen an other white girl over me"

Do you really believe what you just wrote? Do you think you would have asked a question like this if it had been your white girlfriends who had gotten all the attention and not your black friends? If it isn't b/c they are black then why ask what is wrong with European men? You wouldn't have said "What is wrong with European men" if they had been hitting on white women other than yourself (unless you are really narcissistic). You obviously see something abnormal about white women and black women being seen EQUALLY as beautiful as the other or you wouldn't have posted this question.

"Why is it different here. In america, i'm a 100% certain that if I were to walk in a place with only white men and I walked in with some African American girls that a white man would appraoch a black woman at least not in public or in front of a white girl."

What you need to realize is that America has placed ww on this impossibly high pedestal and when you went abroad you got knocked back down a few notches (or more). You have been taught, along with most American men of any color, that white women are the standard of what every other woman wants to be and the woman that every man wants to be with. Your issue is, you believed this to be true and you found out that it wasn't and it was painful for you. I understand this but now you can look at the world with new eyes and stop thinking that you are better just b/c the brainwashed men in America think you are.

I know I came off harsh but this was truly a learning experience for you...more than you bargained for I would guess. I hope you mature from it.  

Answer 17

Now you know how it feels to be discrimated against.  

Answer 18

Ok, what little bubble of a city in the US do you live where you are soooo sheltered that you actually wrote all this c**p??

You thought you would be the first pick, huh??  Because white women are a desireable commodity???

Keep in mind that the US is not near any predominately black countries.  Europe on the other hand is very near Africa and other black countries, so there are more black women there.

"Why is it different here. In america, i'm a 100% certain that if I were to walk in a place with only white men and I walked in with some African American girls that a white man would appraoch a black woman at least not in public or in front of a white girl."  AGAIN, WHERE IN THE US DO YOU LIVE??????????????????????????????????

*************I hope you email what you wrote above to all the black people you know and let them be the judge as to whether or not you are racist.  Anyone that must state 'I am not racist' IS a racist.  I am shocked as to the statements that you used.  Your black girlfriends probaby actually have a body on them and that is why the girls got more attention.  Most men like women with bodies you know.  Your friends are prettier than you. Face it, don't hate.*************************

Answer 19

there's nothing wrong with european men, i live in the uk and i prefer white girls. i couldn't imagine any of my friends chatting up black girls, they're not racist or anything but they just prefer white. it is strange what happened to you though, i guess it might be like that in some parts of london but not in the rest of the uk and certainly not across europe.

Answer 20

well...its said that once you go black, you'll never go back....I dont understand that either but, thats the way it is.....

Answer 21

Tough S**t, love LOL

It's all about culture, NOT race

Answer 22

Britain is not a race sensity nation like the USA.

African American girls look

And its more usuall for black men white women here too so Im guessing African American girls are more willing to be with Whtie men.

African American women unlikely have white men approach them in the US

White British men unlikely have black women willing to be with them in the UK.

So when African American women are exposed to White British men the two attract easily I suppose.

Here beauty comes before skin tone you see. Ive gone out with all races and so has most my friends coming to think of it Black girls are the most faviourite in my area Im not saying the whole of London though as I dont know that. But in my area yes.

Plus African American women are rare here so maybe they are seen as exotic and white girls are plenty here and you look similar to British girls anyway

Did any black britsh men approach you then? And if so did that in any way make you sick or sad?

Answer 23

America has a jacked up history. European men see beauty in ALL races. They are also much more mature. I plan to live in europe one day.

Answer 24

Didn't you just answer your own question with the last sentence?

That's definitely interesting though.  

Answer 25

Since I don't know your name I'll just call you "Becky"..well Becky, this all seems to be a big eye opener to you, interracial dating/marriage and all, and you are obviously taken aback by it so, I'll give you a quote from a movie by spike lee's "jungle fever" which pretty much sums up you and every other Becky and the way you people think:

White man say to his woman:

"Baby, you are the flower...                      

"of white Southern womanhood,

too holy and pure...                      

"to be touched by any man,

including me.                    

"I'm gonna put you

up on a pedestal...                      

"so the whole world will

fall down and worship you.                      

"And if any ni99er

so much as look at you,                      

I'll lynch his a**."                      

She believed him,

thought she really was...                      

holy and pure,

like the Virgin Mary.

                      

She let him put her

up on that pedestal.                      

Meanwhile, the husband,

no sooner than the sun went down... went                      

down to the slave quarters

grabbin' up every piece...                      

of black poontang

he could lay his hands on,                      

then running to the gin mill

to brag about it.

                      

And that's how our blood

got diluted...                      

mulattoes, quadroons,                      

octoroons.

                      

I'm sure that most of those

high and mighty white ladies...                      

felt abandoned.                      

But they were so proud to be

white, and therefore superior,                    

they kept their mouths shut

and their legs locked tight.

                    

But in the midnight hour,                    

layin' there, alone,                      

on the hot bed of lust,                  

I'm sure they must've though

what it would be like...                      

to have one of them

big, black bucks...                      

their husbands were

so desperately afraid of.....

                      

I feel sorry for you.

Here it is the 21st century,                      

and you people still tryin' to make up

for what you missed out on....

Answer 26

People in the UK are notoriously prejudice against black people.  Some of the other countries you mention aren't as bad, but it's hard to imagine that white men in the UK are all about black women.  I think they might have just liked your friends better, period.  It probably had little to do with them being black and you being white.  You're probably not as cute as you think you are, and you're blaming the fact that they preferred your friends on race.  Even in the US, there are a lot of places where a black girl that looks like Liya Kebede or Gabrielle Union will get more attention than a so-so white chick.  I think you aren't giving your friends enough credit.  Sometimes beauty transends race.

Answer 27

So its starting here to . Black woman are hot like it or not . Besides its all pink on the inside

Answer 28

Maybe America is still filled with racism. Even though people dont like to admit they really are racist.