Short funny sayings...?

Question

I want a funny short saying for my msn personal message

Can anyone think of any?

xxxxxxxxxx

Each one that makes me laugh will get 2 stars each...x

Answer 1

man who walks through airport door sideways is going to bangkok

Answer 2

Denial isn't just a river in Eygpt.

I understand it.... i just dont get it.

Life is like a dic* when it gets hard fu*k it!

Answer 3

"when i was born, i was so surprised that i didnt talk for a year and a half !!"

nice isn't ? :D

Answer 4

I'm not suffering from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

For sale: One parachute, been used once, never been opened, has small stain.

You're only young once but you can be immature forever.

I called your boyfriend g*y and he hit me with his purse!

A good friend will come bail you out of jail, a real friend will be there right next to you saying d**n! we F*cked up!

Give  man fire and he'll be warm for a day, Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life!

A wise man once said, "I don't know...go ask a woman!"

tc

Answer 5

''NOTHING'S OUT OF REACH IF YOU'VE GOT LONG ARMS'' or ''COLOUR MEANS NOTHING TO A BLIND MAN'' - jimmy connolly Calcium Kid

Answer 6

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.

It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.

Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.

Put your future in good hands - your own.

Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted.

It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.

Always act like you’re wearing an invisible crown.

s*x appeal is fifty percent what you’ve got and fifty percent what people think you’ve got.

Always hold your head up, but be careful to keep your nose at a friendly level.

Helen Giangregorio

He who laughs last didn't get it.

Philander Johnson

Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.

Honoré de Balzac

Behind every great fortune there is a crime.

Tom Wilson, Ziggy

Honesty is the best image.

Will Rogers

Common sense ain't common.

Mark Twain

When in doubt, tell the truth.

Marvin Kitman

A coward is a hero with a wife, kids, and a mortgage.

Haythum R. Khalid

All power corrupts, but we need electricity.

Gary Kasparov

Chess is mental torture.

George Bernard Shaw

Do not try to live for ever.

pains me to say this, but I may be getting too mature for details."

- Jerry in The Deal

"Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason."

- Jerry in The Baby Shower

Answer 7

friends are like *** cheeks... sh** comes between them but they always stick together !

Makess Me Laugh =)) !

Answer 8

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

Answer 9

Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.

Tell your little voices to SHUT UP! I can't hear mine,,,

Answer 10

te gusta yanice?