Should I Be Crying; My Aunts Just Died?

Question

Okay, my great aunt who I am very closed to has just died in her sleep. My mum thinks it's odd I'm not crying. I'm not in shock, because I'm absolutely fine. Should I be crying right now? I didn't with my grandad when he died. I only cried at his funereal, but I can't go to my great aunts because it was awful at my grandad's and I can't face another one.

Bella.

Answer 1

You could be in shock and not realize it. Just because your not crying doesn't mean your not grieving. Everyone reacts differently to death.

What do you mean by his funeral was "awful" ?

Was the actual funeral awful, or was it the atmosphere that was awful ?

When my brothers friend died, my brother didn't want to go to his funeral, but he did because he knew that if he didn't go, he would regret it. After the funeral, he was physically sick. This was a couple of months ago and there are times when he still crys.

Like I said, everyone grieves differently.  

Answer 2

you should be crying.......no its OK not to cry some people dont cry

Answer 3

Grief is handled in a multitude of ways and doesn't necessitate public emotions.

Answer 4

No... deal with it in your own way... there's no prescribed way to deal with death, any death

Answer 5

Hi everyone is different and you will cry in your own time, when my nana died I cried a little when we knew that she didnt have long left but it wasnt, like it would be if it was someone really close to me, it was more upsetting seeing other people around me crying etc.

I think if you were to go to the funeral that you will shed a tear, I know its not a nice thing to go to so dont if you dont want to. But you will cry in your own time , it might not be for days even years, but it might just hit you one day or you wont.

It just the way you cope with things, I know its not really the same, but my dog passed away and it was the eldest dog everyone else was heartbroken and I still havent cried properly,yet but when my rabbit died I was crying my eyes out as it was sudden.

Its like you know its going to happen its weird.  

Answer 6

you will cry when and if you need to

Answer 7

Everyone deals with grief and the death of someone in different ways, there's no set way to do this!!  

Answer 8

well...it will hit you ....eventually down the week or month ...and you'll start

crying there...wherever you are.

Answer 9

Everyone deals with Loss in differnent

ways i was the same when my nan

died i didnt want to cry cause i didnt want to make

my mum and dad even more upset

i was kind of in deniel that she died but when

we was at the funeral i just let out in tears

but after i felt better because i was letting it out

Just because your not crying doesnt

mean you dont care you are just

so shocked and upset on the inside but

dont want to show it

sorry for your loss

Hope everything turns out ok

your aunts in a better place now

Answer 10

People deal with grief and sadness in different ways.  Not everyone cries when sad things happen.

I was exactly the same as you with my own grandad.  I didn't cry until the funeral, and then I was inconsolable.  After that, I was fine.

Just say to your mum that you have a different way of dealing with things - it's not that you don't care.

Answer 11

My grams passed away a few weeks back. I was really close to her. She raised me for a while. But I COULDN'T cry. So I helped with the arrangements. My family all thought that it was odd that I didn't cry. Not even at the funeral. But then, about a week after her funeral, I was cleaning and I found something of my grams that she had lost. I was so excited, I ran to her room. And I lost it. I cried for two days. The kind of crying that makes you sick. I was inconsolable. Its okay not to cry right away. Maybe you aren't ready to accept her death yet. Or maybe you just cant cry. I'm sorry about your loss. Good luck!

---Raquel

Answer 12

No dear, you don't have to cry, but make sure you are not taking it too hard on yourself. Believe it, this is part of the life, and we can't do anything about it. Think about all the good memory, you have from her, for sure she is in peace now.

Life is going on...........

Answer 13

maybe you just dont cry easily. not as sensitive as some people?

Answer 14

no everyone is different. i cry but not in front of people. everyone is different. as long as your not to cheery your mum shldnt moan about it

Answer 15

...

You have probably hot come to terms with it yet.

And being at the funerals as properly made you realise that they have gone for good

just see how you go.  

Answer 16

people deal with death in different ways, being told that you should crying is wrong even mentioning it, my fiance laughs, honestly i always think cruel b*****d, but it is just how he copes i just ball my eyes out even if i see a funeral on t.v i'm just like that, so to your question it completly depends how you cope with death, xxxx

Answer 17

some cultures dont grieve like we do in the west, i dont think you have to and i dont think it automatically means youre emotionally cold or numb if you dont. people respond differently.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17_TtOysQ...