Should I Home Educate my Autistic Son?

Question

My son has Asperger's Syndrome and ADHD, he's 8 years old, in his 3rd school. It is a enhanced resources school and I was very particular about which school he should attend as the previous 2 could not meet his needs. This school can now not cope with his "noises" and want to send him home for 2 of the 5 days, as he distracts the rest of the class and is sent out on a regular basis. My faith in our schooling system is at a all time low, should I educate him at home, does any body have any good home education sites?

Answer 1

My son also has ADHD and high functioning Autism, I would absoloutely not recommend home schooling, he needs to be in school for the educational and the social skills he can develop there.  Make an appointment to see the Head and the SENCo, and if you get no joy there, call your local Parent Partnership at the council and get some advise.

I know it would be tempting to home school him, but I think that might be too isolating for him and yourself.

Answer 2

My Daughter has Autism and was in public school up to 3rd grade as well when i finally began teaching her at home. She was in a school for special students and still the teacher had no clue how to deal with her sensory needs. I actually went to the school super and told him i wanted their curriculum so I could teach her at home. They happily gave it to me, and I just bought the books for it on eBay. I DO NOT REGRET IT!!! She started in Oct,. and will be finished with 4th grade in 2 weeks(that's with doing several units in social studies and science twice). I feel like public schools have become glorified daycares. My child was pushed through 3rd grade and no one at her school ( a very renowned school in our area) had any idea she couldn't even subtract yet. You are making the right choice. On the matter of socialization, what people who do not have Autistic kids don't realize, is that socializing these kids is not as important as socializing typical kids. I DO socialize my kids anyway though, I just go through the Autism society, and occasionally bring her back up to her old school for recess. It's perfect. It's win win, trust me!

Answer 3

Hi.

I speak as the father of a boy who has both cerebral palsy and autism, who my wife and I home educated for fifteen years.  I am now also qualified in child development / cognitive psychology.

Many children who suffer from Autism, experience what I term as 'sensory distortions.'  This problem can make them poor candidates for a mainstream (or any other) classroom.  What they tend to do is to self stimulate as a consequence of their sensory difficulty. For instance, a child who suffers visual undersensitivity might constantly wave its hand in front of its eyes in order to give itself the visual stimulation of light and dark.  A child who makes noises, as does your son, might be experiencing auditory undersensitivity and be attempting to unconsciously correct that by providing himself with auditory stimulus.

If you do home school him, be aware of your rights.  You do not have to follow a set curriculum, but can follow your own developmental programme.  Go to my website at http://www.snowdrop.cc and you will find a great deal of information there.  You will also find a book which will be of interest to you titled 'Autism: A guide to understanding and helping your child.'

Hope this helps.

Answer 4

I am shocked to hear that a school which is designed to cope with your son's needs is struggling to cope with his 'noises'. In fact, I am flabbergasted.

I teach children with special needs and I once taught in a communication disorder school. I had up to five in a class and the day could range from high pitched and frenetic to slow and peaceful. It's part and parcel of the job!

Your son's school must accommodate him. It sounds like they are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. It is their job to make sure his needs are met, not the other way around.

They have NO RIGHT to send him home! (assuming you are in the UK)

Please contact:

http://www.nas.org.uk/

Please contact me if you would like to discuss this further.

Answer 5

hi my nephew has been diagnosed with autism , hese 3 on the 1st april , hese a caractor, he likes being with other kids but plays in his own little world. he doesent talk to the other kids but will hae a good chat with himself, he loves a cuddle but not for long he also gives eye contact, my sister inlaw takes him to play school, she expained his diagnoses and there willing to go on courses to ajust to his needs,and she has been intouch with the autistic society and found the web site really helpfull,,,,,, -http//www.autism.org.uk/autism. they have a help line open 10 -4 mon -fri 08450704004 . hope that helps .  best wishes grannyang****

Answer 6

i wont pretend to know anything on this subject cos i dont. but, it'd be nice for him to live a normal life and share in what other kids his age do. just find a school that has pupils with the same thing so they have more experience. good luck.

Answer 7

i have 5 children with fragile x syndrome 4 girl`s and one boy.

they heve various level`s of need`s both academic .social and emotional....my son has full mutation and is a carrier with autism ....he attended the local special needs school in scotland..and i demanded at every oppurtunity that it is the school`s responsibility to provide a cirriculim to fit his need`s .

and he is now 20 and has developed into a fine young man.

the onus is on the education authority to employ teacher`s who are specialist in autism...good luck and never give up...

Answer 8

i have a autistic son, perservere with a school, he should be able to get funding for a few hours a week with a special needs teacher (my son gets 7 1/2), it sounds like the school has a poor understandind of autism, my son has never been sent home, not because hes a angel but because the school doesnt give up on the kids and that is a mainstreem school. once you get somewhere you are both happy with he will thrive on the school routine, it also gives you a break

Answer 9

My son's 23 now. When I was faced with this issue, I sued and made them keep him, then sued again and got them to pay tuition for private school. But that's because I was a single parent and had to work full time. If you have the ability and resources to homeschool, then maybe it's a good idea. But I would try to make sure that you both get respite from each other a few times a week. He's going to lose out on a lot of socialization and also getting used to working with other folks, for when he's grown and then later still, when you are gone.

.

Answer 10

I haven't read all the answers so sorry if I am repeating anything. He needs the contact with other children to develop the social skills. You have to educate this school. I just found out that Tony Attwood is speaking in Manchester on 16 April you need to contact Bryan Craig on this address : [e-mail]

to get the details. It is £150 for persons from school to attend and they have to go and listen to him speak because he is THE expert on Aspergers and they need to be educated.

In the meantime tell your class teacher that your son is making these noises to block out noises that are going on, so the class teacher has to learn to cope with this, one way is to stick background music on. They do not have the right to say he cannot go to school, they have to provide for his needs.

Answer 11

The school needs to develop a behavior plan to help your son stop the behavior--fight for that so he can stay in school--

if you feel home schooling is the best for your child-definately go for it....

Answer 12

My son is 16 and has Asperger Syndrome .. he was also very hyper active when he was younger.  your son needs to be in school if for no other reason , "socialization ".   He needs other children to socialize with .

         This year my son was taken out of the special education program ,he is doing fine ... and he even joined the wrestling team at school.  I was tempted to keep him home when he was younger , I'm very glad I didn't . Although I had some real battles with the school system.

        Good  Luck...with whatever you decide!

Answer 13

Personally I would get parent partnership involved as this is not right. Every child has the right to an education if you remove him it wont help Talk to the school's SENCo ask what they are doing to support him.They can release funds for emergency one to one support and it sounds like he needs it. Please before you do anything talk to parent partnership involved

Answer 14

I'm a teaching assistant working with children with severe learning difficulties in Birmingham. If your son's current school can't cope then the LEA must find him a suitable placement, he has the right to a state education! Enhanced resource school sounds to me like a mainstream school with a few extra teaching/inclusion assistants.

    From personal experience I know that schools sometimes bend the rules when excluding pupils that they find difficult. I'd check Derbyshire LEA's policy on exclusion and ask the Head as well. Sending your son home 2 out of 5 days sounds to me like a staffing issue rather than one of behaviour.

    Do the staff have any training in ASD/Asperger's and ADHD? Do they adapt your son's day to meet his needs? What Behaviour Management Strategies are in place? Do they help your son manage his own behaviour?

    Your son deserves a state education, anything other the best is not acceptable.

Answer 15

i did voluntary work with an autistic boy. his mum followed the sonrise programme (american based) and then the growing minds programme (also american based) she advertised for volunteers and set him a play room up with toys and educational tasks. we all had a different area to focus on eg, pe , english, maths!

Answer 16

Please don't if possible take your son out of school. I have an autistic daughter who distracts the rest of the class and also has very extreme social anxieties. I was very tempted to take her out of school and did look into it. The main problem is you Will be isolating your son even more and he will get even less support than he currently does. The best thing to do is to go into the school and discuss with the SENCO other options that are available. Could the school give him a one to one support assistant or could you perhaps with the support of the local educational authority look into getting him into an autism specific school? Your son does have a legal right to a full time education and the authority is failing him by not providing him with this. Have you tried your local parent partnership service who will help you get what you need for your son? Good luck.

Answer 17

All great advice above, but for me it is more about the socialization, particularly with Aspergers.  At only 8, your son has a lot of education to participate in, and that is a long time for you too.  Never accept that they cannot 'cope', it is their job to do that.  Above all, try to retain your faith in schooling system, it is just a few who cannot be bothered to find the extra funding or staff etc.  Assert your rights!

Answer 18

I assume you mean he is verbal stimming or having an outburst. Well verbal stemming they need to find something to replace it. When he starts his aid (hopefully he has one) shoudl gentley say no do this instead. Show him somehting differant. They will transfer thier actions to it. As far as outburst they need to figure out what is setting him off and adjust it so he isnt upset. Same for the verbal stemming hes doing it for a reason. I had to get my son also this past two weeks. Now we finally figure out what was wrong and gave him some more sensory activities and it is much btter. Its a process of elimination. I thought about homeschooling cuz first thought as a parent is I want him safe and educated. BUT honestly he would never give me the attention or focus he does at school.

Answer 19

I was disturbed to hear that your son has had such a bad start to his education.  I have worked in Special Schools and in Mainstream education with children requiring additional support needs. My main interest has been Autistic Spectrum.  It is sad that you have had to move your son so many times - this must have caused no end of stress for your whole family.  You must seek advice and support from the Local Education Office and Psychological Services.  Have you joined any Autism Groups for support and friendship?  I can understand how you are feeling - even teachers are struggling to keep faith with the Education System which claims to be "Inclusive" and very often is anything but!  You and your son need friendship and support - so try and keep him at school - make the school account for why they feel they can't cope with his noises.  Feel free to contact me by e-mail if you want to.  If I can help - I will.

Answer 20

Were the "noises" explained to the school when you enrolled him. If its something new get them to look at his behaviour around it (behaviour analysis) as there probably a reason why he's doing it. Does he have a way communicate effectively. Any "challenging behaviour (this is what it sounds like they are classing this as) has a good chance of being overcome with an appropriate communication method.

I'm not sure what an enhanced resources school is but if you don't want to home school him. You could try getting him into a special school for the two days. Find out if there is a school which works specifically with autistic students in your area, as they seem to be becoming more popular.

I'm not sure about the legality of them asking you to keep him at home for only part of the week. I always thought that you were either home schooled or you were sent to school.

Another method they could try would be diversion away from his activity.  Another thing is that maybe the other students need to be taught how to cope with him. If they know what "starts him off" or what his problems are they may be able to help him.

Answer 21

I work w/ children some have special needs. I have also grown up in a home with a sibling with special needs.

The school he is in cannot dismiss your child just because he is "distracting" other students. I would try to arrange and IEP meeting as soon as possible. Have advocates for your son there as representatives and be VERY vocal to what goals you want your son to meet.

If after that, you are not satisfied, try looking into the homeschooling. But it is also good to keep him in scheduled outings and activities if you do so.

Best thing to if you plan on decide on homeschooling is look around for parents w/ special needs children support groups. I know that can sound a little odd. Its more like a parent alliance than anything I know it help my mother so much to feed off of other parents ideas and experiences. If there isn't any in your area, be a leader and start one up, I'm sure you have a lot of members in no time at all.

Your child is blessed to have such a caring parent. You know your child, don't accept what others say he is capable of.

Answer 22

my son is 44 now

keep your son in school...it is up to the school system to adjust to his needs...you are paying taxes...if they can not use public schools...they will pay for private...insist

after he is about 20...the choices are zero for help

get it now.........and be prepared for all the snide comments about what people think you should do!

it will break your heart

i understand

Answer 23

Be ready for a fight if you decide to home educate.

I was just in your shoes,same problem. Only my child was in first grade. I was at the school more than work, he was in the office more than class. He was steadily getting worse. We all cried darn near every night.

So what did I do? I took him out, set up outside programs to cover areas I could not handle. It has been 2 weeks now ,and the change in him is wonder full. How ever the school loves to call and harass me almost daily about meetings. He had an IEP in place. We hired someone to develop an IEP for home study.

My next step is a lawyer.

Good luck to you no matter you choice.

Answer 24

I would really encourage you to try to work something out with the school that is agreeable to both parties.  While it may be easier in many aspects to home school your son, I think that he probably really needs to be around other children his age.

Answer 25

The school is wrong in sending him out all the time. THis is illegal because it is discrimination against his disability and violating the law that states a child has to be in school x*x amount of days a year.

THEY are violating this law, not YOU.

If you want him to continue in this school, you will have to fight hard in getting this resolved because MOST schools are VERY corrupt with special education.

If you keep him there, it will probably continue and it will for every school he goes to.

Is this a special education school? If so, they are violating the law even MORE because this school is suppose to be specially qualified to handle issues such as this. That is what a special ed school is for!!

Homeschool is the BEST way to go I think, but it is up to you.

Answer 26

*I* am flabbergasted by the people who assume that homeschoolers don't socialize. We socialize every day with new friends and old friends.

I have two kids with autism (one severe, one aspie). After five years of fighting with the schools about every single aspect of schooling, from academic to social, I chose to homeschool, It is AWESOME. Not only are the getting the academic stuff that they need (My 2nd grader couldn't read or do basic addition when I pulled her out, because the school wouldn't bother to push her) but they are getting much more appropriate socialization. Smaller groups, which they could choose their level of interaction. Because of that, they are much more social now than they ever were in school. My nonverbal daughter has several girls her age who think she is cool, and that she likes being around. My aspie son has five or six friends who come over all the time, every day we have teens hanging out in our home or meeting up to go somewhere.

Answer 27

Get hold of your social worker and ask for placement in a special needs school. Main stream education does not suit everyone. Do not try to educate at home, you will soon be worn out and without knowing or wanting to you will neglect him.

Best of luck

Answer 28

My son is on the spectrum.

Home schooling is very very tempting but personally I do not think it is the best thing.

Can I ask where you are located and can then perhaps give you some more information