Should I become a part time stripper?

Question

Ok, this is kind of long, but I think that I need to explain the situation fully for real advice... heh. So here goes!!

I am twenty years old, and a single mother of two. My little girl is almost three and my son is almost a year old. I have a full time job, making about 23k a year. I am also a full time student, working on the second year of my bachelor degree. I am still struggling immensely to make my bills and take care of my family. The father doesn't help me any. We've gone to court for child support, but so far I've seen nothing. If he doesn't pay, I don't get any help. I am getting some government help, WIC and part of my daycare tuition is paid for. I am also getting a couple of scholarships to help pay for my own school tuition. I "make too much" to receive food stamps or help with rent or anything else. I am so broke I can't see straight. I know that I am not wasting my money on stupid things, I'm actually pretty bad about being a penny counter. And yet, I still find myself struggling. I've thought about taking on another part time job, but waitressing or anything else won't make me enough money to help. I'd be paying out as much in a babysitter as I would be getting at the end of the night. I've heard from a few reliable sources that stripping can pay very well, if you have any talent at all. I guess I'm teetering on the edge for a couple of reasons. I've never been judgmental towards strippers or think that they are doing anything bad, but it is hard to imagine myself being one. I am very shy and despite having my children I've always kind of been known as a goody two shoes. I'm deathly afraid of an audition, I can see myself turning beet red when I started dancing. I've never danced in front of anyone before ha. I think I would be ok over time, but it would definitely take some getting used to. I'm also a little self-conscious about my body. I know that I by no means look like I've had two children, but it doesn't change the fact that I feel like I'm not quite pretty enough, or that my body isn't tight enough. I know I'm not ugly, but I don't think I'm drop dead gorgeous either. I know that I would have to hide what I was doing from my family and all but one friend, they would never understand. When I think about telling the kids when they get older what I did through college, I get mixed feelings. On one hand it seems like nothing to be ashamed of, but on the other I don't know if it would make me a very good influence. But then I start thinking about being able to make all my past due bills and getting out of debt (so much debt!!), or being able to get a car that I can count on and won't break down every other day. I think about being able to buy clothes for my kids for the new school year, ones that won't be too small on them. And being able to afford winter coats for them, and a carseat that my son will fit in. I think about being able to get out of this apartment complex that is filled with nasty people who party constantly. I think about getting myself clothes that fit me and don't make me look anorexic because the only ones I have are from when I was pregnant. I think about giving opportunities to my children that I otherwise couldn't offer them. I think about being able to save so when my student loans come back to bite me in the *** I'll be able to pay them. When I think about those things, it sounds like the best idea in the world. I guess I need some help figuring out the best thing to do, and since I can't talk to my family about it, I've come here. All opinions are welcome. I know in the end it is my decision, but I would really appreciate some advice.

Thank you!

Answer 1

DO IT!!

Your kids should be your first priority and they will really benefit from you dancing. Not only will you have money to buy things, but you won't be as stressed out because of money & happier. A happy mom is a good mom, stress/depression can rub off on your kids.

I am a dancer, but no one would ever guess I would be.

I have always been very shy & quiet. I was never that girl who would flash people or play strip poker. All my girl friends make fun of me because I am so prude, I never even kiss guys unless I really like them a lot.

You get used to dancing surprisingly fast. Since all the girls get naked & it's socially acceptable in this environment, you get used to it pretty quick. Being naked isn't a big deal, no one cares or notices. It's funny, girls will talk to the DJ/manager completely naked and he barely notices because he's so used to it (they hire really good guys who aren't weird/creepy at all).

I'm not going to lie, auditioning was probably the scariest thing I ever did. I was so scared I was literally shaking & couldn't even remember what I did, even though I was sober!! I started dancing with a friend, which made it a lot easier.

I am just dancing to put myself in college. I plan to have an actual career later on in life.

I am planning to go back to dancing for a bit after I have kids though.

It's good because you only have to work 3 days a week & can make good money.

I like that I will be able to be home during the day when my husband is at work, and he will be home when I am at work.

I think it would be easier to find a sitter at night also.

Most important is that I would have lots of time to be with my babies. . . I would not tell them though.

It's not the best job, sometimes I hate it, & most girls need to take a little break now & then.

As long as you have confidence in yourself & know your boundaries, you'll be fine.

Of course there are bad apples. There's always that girl who will do extra or someone who does drugs (aren't there druggies & s***s everywhere???)

Looks aren't the most important when it comes to dancing. I have seen girls of all sizes make money. I'm a skinny girl (I still have T&A though), and have often been turned down for bigger girls. Dancing has really taught me that every guy has their own idea of beauty.

Knowing how to hustle is important, how to talk to the guys, what to say. . . It's all a big game.

It will be a disservice to your kids if you don't at least try it.

Your kids deserve the best, and you will be able to provide for them more if you started dancing.

Not only will you have more money, you will have more time, & you will be less stressed, giving your kids a happier environment to grow up in.

Please email me for more info!!

Dancers generally don't help out the new girl because she's competition.

I would love to give you more info about what it's really like, how to make money, & to not let it get to you. . .

Answer 2

Its not all that bad but im sure that with the new money your kids will have mostly what they want but its up to you if you want to expose yourself like that.

Answer 3

If you call 2-1-1 from a land line, they can help you find community resources for diapers, clothes, formula, food, rental/utility help, gas vouchers, etc.  Most places they will refer you to do not look at income.  Also, have you tried getting section 8?  I would at least apply and see what they tell you.  Hopefully with this help you will not have to strip.

Answer 4

I think it's a good idea, as long as it really is part time... I'm sure your children would appreciate your company more than a bit more cash! When i babysat for a little girl, whose mum always worked, she used to complain about never seeing mummy, and she used to ask me to take her to her work! But yeah... I think as long as you only work a couple of nights a week, it would be a good idea, and possibly when you're in costume behind a facade you're putting on, you will feel more comfortable, because you know it is just an act.

Good luck with whatever you end up doing!

Answer 5

Yours sounds like many strippers stories. I would not want to do that unless it were my ONLY option. Have you thought about doing work from home like maybe tutoring or online sales. Since you are going to school (good for you) there might be some companies in your field of study that would hire you already.

Here is kind of a strange idea that I will just throw out there.

My friend got a system on her computer so she can cut and edit music. Like you put in your CD or MP3 file and you can play around with the length and the volume etc. If you have a Mac computer you should already have it (GarageBand) if not than you can subscribe to a site where you can download the software. Figure skaters, dancers and gymnasts pay $50 and up for a basic music edit.