Should I change all of our last names to my husbands?

Question

With my first daughter I was a single mom. Then I met my husband when she was 11 mths. We eventually married. I kept my last name because that is my first daughters last name. Now we are expecting our second daughter on Sept 8th. Should I change all of our last names to his so we all have the same family name? What would you do?

Answer 1

blurring lineage is never a good idea. i would keep the names how they are

Answer 2

If the oldest child isn't his then I don't really see why she should have his last name too, unless it's something the both of you want. I would make your last name his, it's the proper thing to do, as well as your new child. It would probably make your oldest daughter feel more in the family if you did give her his last name if you give the new baby his .

Answer 3

I agree with safiya, it causes way more trouble. You should have his last name,if you are married, maybe think about hyphenated it. but really i do not think your oldest will feel left out. especially since she is a girl and will probably adopt the name of her husband in the future. i have two sisters and we all had different last names. when my mom changed the oldest two to match ours it caused a big mess,and still does 20 years later.  

Answer 4

I married my  first husband and never changed my name.. then we had a kid.. so she got his last name.. then he died...

now I remarried.. and he has different last name, I still have my maiden name and will not change it for any man.  I am an artist my name is my art identity.. plus I am a strong woman, and my husband doesnt feel I need to take his name to show our love..

so now we are a family of 3 with 3 different last names, it is becomeing more and more common.. its a hassle when traveling by plane, but no biggie.. it always has worked out ok

Answer 5

To me, it would make the most sense if your husband changes his name to yours. That way, all of you will have the same name. Case solved. Why should it always be the woman who makes the sacrifice in changing her name and not the man? Afterall, this is the 21st century.

-or-

you could be like the jolie-pitt's, and have a hyphenated name for your kid.

Answer 6

Your first childs dad would have to agree to the name change.  I really don't see the point of changing it especially since it is her name.  When she's 18 is she wants to change her name then so be it.  For the new baby, why not just hyphenate your's and the dad's last names?  That's what most families do when the mom kept her maiden name.  Btw, my daughter and I have different last names.  I have never had any problems with it and actually considering the number of single parents and divorced households there are, it's not uncommon at all at her school.

Answer 7

It's totally up to you.  Personally I would change all the names to be the same as that is less confusing.  I am assuming your new baby will have your husbands last name.  If your daughter thinks of your husband as her dad, then by changing her last name it may help her feel more like a part of the family than having a different last name.

Answer 8

dont change your or your older daughters last name but have the baby have both the names.. ex: your last name is smith, your husbands is johnson, the babys name will be smith-johnson

Answer 9

Depends if your names sound nice with your husbands last name! I think you should!

Answer 10

If your first daughter's father is still in her life then I don't see why you would want to change her last name. She already has a father and there is no need to make her think this new man is taking her father's place. Just my opinion.

Answer 11

yeah change them