Should I change to please my parents?

Question

My parent's are always making fun of me for not dressing like a girl. Should I change to their expectation's, or should I continue my regular clothing? (punk/rock, tomboy, cow girl)

Answer 1

Well, no. That just means you're weak and suspect to influence.

Answer 2

No, not if you don't want to.  If it would make your mum happy you could try on something a little more girly, you never know you might find something you like.  My sister always dressed like a tomboy when she was 14-15, then she just decided when she got older that she wanted to wear other stuff and started buying different styles of tops and stuff.  You don't have to go all dresses, lace, and frills.  But if you're happy in your clothes then that's fine, don't change just for someone else's sake.

Answer 3

No. They need to accept you for the fact that you are a tomboy. If anything its their fault for not treating you like a girl. I'll bet your father had you out there when he worked on cars or had you play with your brothers.

Its their fault. Besides, tomboys are s**y nowadays. and yes I did say nowadays.

Answer 4

That depends on what's more important to you: expressing yourself through clothing or being treated nicely?  It's a personal choice with no right answer.

Answer 5

yes, change. That is if you ever want to meet a half-way descent guy... (tomboy, punk rock, etc=major turn off!)

Answer 6

no  stay  way  you are

Answer 7

You don't have to change, but you should be considerate.  Offer a deal to them - you will dress like a "lady" for certain situations, like fancy dinners or holiday parties with the family or other social gatherings that you attend with your parents, but the rest of the time you are allowed to dress as you please with no comments from anyone.

Answer 8

no they should accept who you are and love you for it  

Answer 9

How about Compromise? Dress girly for special occasions and casual for everything else? Only if you want to, of course.

Answer 10

NO! You are who you are, and don't be afraid to show it!

Answer 11

i had the same problem. ignore them and be yourself. you should never change for someone else EVEN if they are your parents. you are your own person and if they don't like it it's their loss.

Answer 12

It depends, if ur goin out, where some legings and a babydoll! Just hangin out? - SWEATS!  

Answer 13

i dont know do what you wana do unless its to get somthing

Answer 14

Wear what yoiu want but like it or not, whether it is fair or not,we ARE judged by our appearance.

Answer 15

The only person you should try to please is GOD.

  Hebrews 13:5-6  "Let your conduct be without covetousness, and be content with such things that you have, for he has said, 'I will never  leave you, nor forsake you,' so that we may boldly say, 'The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do to me.'"

    Jesus offers each of us a walk with God and a fullness of life that is not possible without him. As he said, "I am the bread of life" (John 6:35), and "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me" (John 14:6). He also said, "I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again" (John 3:3). Jesus' death, resurrection, and offer of eternal life is the greatest manifestation of God's love for you.

        For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life (John 3:16).

        But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved (Ephesians 2:4-5).

    If you have not been born again—that is, if you have not become a Christian—let me invite you to surrender yourself to him now, for "everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved" (Romans 10:13). Give your life to God by accepting Jesus as your Savior and Lord. Let me invite you to read the following as a prayer.

        Dear Lord, I confess that I am a sinner. Please forgive my sins and accept me as your child. I invite you to be my Savior and the Lord of my life. I surrender myself to you in the name of Jesus Christ, my Savior and Lord.

Answer 16

No. Be who you wanna be, not who they want you to be. :)

Answer 17

Who cares what other people think. Even if it IS your parents.

I think my mom has some weird thing against me because I'm not like my brother "Mr. Perfect" or AKA her "Dream Child".

I thought about changing to make her proud of me but I just have to say, I'm me, and that's what I want to be. I don't care what other people think.

But hey if that's what YOU want to do cuz you're worried so much about it, then yes you should change. But only if YOU want to, not because you just think it will make them happy.

Answer 18

If you are paying  for your clothes dress to please yourself. If Mum and Dad are footing the bill give consideration to their wishes some of the time.Compromise is always a good solution when you have to negotiate with your parents.

Answer 19

Hello Astin's Baby

You do not tell us your age or your living situation with respect to your parents.

Do you live with them? Out on your own?

Dress is personal, for some it is a statement of who they are. At times in our life we may use it to rebel against society and our parents.

We may use clothing to also fit in with others or to separate us from others.

It can be complex.

I am concerned that they are "making fun" of you, that is just pure and simply wrong.

At some point you will need to follow dress codes. School, work, special occasions.

For example to hold down a job you will be expected to dress and behave in certain ways. It is no big deal.

Many people are telling you NO - do not change.

I would like to suggest a more mature solution to you.

Are you able to approach them and talk to them as one mature person to another?

Ask them why they do not approve of your dress.

Listen to them? Have them, listen to you?

In all relationships in life, there is need for adjustment and accommodation. When people "dig in their heels", refuse to change. This can create conflict. It can lead to poor or failed relationships.  Marriages, jobs, families.

I am not suggesting you should do all the changing.

There is a point in our lives where we graduate from childhood defiance to a more mature adult view of the world... Some never do, maybe your parent's never did. Conflict resolution...

Good luck.

Answer 20

hey there..

Well, that sucks that your parents make fun of you, because they really shouldn't. You are who you are, and you shouldn't change.

However.. you don't have to change Yourself and your personality, but maybe you could change what you wear a little. How old are you?

Because they may be trying to change the way you dress because if you are getting into the college scene or job/career scene, then dressing appropriately is something that will get you places.

Let me just say this..

People should look at you and like you for who you are and see YOU and not just see the clothes you are wearing.

Just because you wear certain clothes, it doesn't mean that you are like that.

Be who you are, but realize that it's about what's inside that matters, so maybe changing wouldn't be a horrible thing.

Watch an episode of What Not to Wear!!!

Answer 21

thank them for their concern but let them know you are perfectly fine with the clothes you wear and so are most people other than your parents.  

Answer 22

Be who you are.  Your partents will get used to it.

Answer 23

don't change. you are who you are. and you cant help that. they need to accept you as you are. not who they want you to be.

Answer 24

Many parents want the perfect looking child. What they don't realize is that as kids grow up, they must learn to make certain decisions on their own. If you start to give in to everything they want you to do, they will see you as more vulnerable and it will be harder for you to feel confident in making choices as an adult unless you have their approval.

Answer 25

be yourself,!

they should stop worrying about you and worry about themselves.