Should I come out of the closet? Help!!?

Question

My mom's side of the family is uber Christian. They go to church multiple times a week and she's always talking about how blessed she is and stuff. But that part of y family isn't homophobic. My grandma even talks about how cute the homosexual couple that lives next door looks together when they walk their dog every morning.

My dad's side of the family isn't very religious. My mom is lucky if she can drag my dad to church on any week that isn't a holiday. My dad always talks about how he hates g*y people and how "The p***s in the *** loving f**s will burn in h**l". We were in the mall one day and he called two men walking together ******* to their face.

I hate myself for being g*y. Sometimes I just want to kill myself.

Answer 1

Dude, you have to stop hating yourself. There's nothing wrong with loving another human being, it's rather beautiful, if you think about it. So, firstly, I'd stop with the negative thought process. It's bringing you down. Mom sounds like a safe person to tell, and dad would eventually come around I think, but you never know. Your mother most probably talk some sense into him, if you can confide in her with your secret.

But seriously though, like I said, learn to love you for who you are, i think it's a part of coming out, but you're going to just have to accept yourself.

If you wanna talk, I have Y!M. I'll message you my Y! ID.

Answer 2

First off you not alone there are a whole bunch of people all over the planet who love you and accept you for who you are. Coming out is very different for each person. Only you can decide on what to do but i can give one thing of advice. Start small, a friend that you trust and know will be okay with it. At least then there is one person you can talk to and rely on. After that you can extend the people who know slowly but surely and you will feel better for having their support. This will help you in finally coming out to the family which is the hardest.  

Answer 3

There's no hurry. I would just wait if I were you. Sexuality is very personal and it shouldn't be flaunted. However, if someone were to ask you, then it's alright to tell them the truth.

Edit: I just read the rest of your question... By all means I would never tell your dad. Gosh that's bad that he feels that way. It's not anyone's fault your g*y. You can't help it. Don't hate yourself. If you really feel the need to tell someone, you should tell a close friend for now and let that be it. But please don't hate yourself for who you are :)

~Kisses~

Answer 4

Its the with me my moms side of the family has g*y people in it and there accepting but I'm not very close with my cousins who are g*y. They never even told me but I can tell. My Dad also says he thinks they are disgusting I wanna tell my parents but I don't want something really bad to happen. It made me really depressed too now I'm on anti-depressants. I don't know what to do either but they aren't the only problem I don't want to lose all my friends if they find out because I don't have many friends but I see them everyday and my life would be so boring without them because my old friends and messed up and I don't want to see them anymore. Want to add me so you can tell me how it goes if you do tell them or vise\versa

Answer 5

My mom's side of the family is Christian and uber republican, and she hates g*y people and think that they're disgusting, saying they live some sort of completely different lifestyle or some c**p like that, like we're animals or something.

My dad's side of the family are atheists as are my sister and I but also pretty republican, not as much as my mom's side of the family though hah... His father was g*y and he even told me and my sister "if you guys are g*y or whatever just tell me it's fine" but his initial reaction is always really bad to these things.

But the case that I'm in is... I'm g*y, but I was born female, though I know inside I'm male. I told my mom, she freaked out a bit and is still in denial and hates talking about it, she thinks I'm going through a phase or something dumb like that ughh. My dad will probably kill me if he knew though, but with him you can never quite tell...

Anyway. I know what you mean man. It really sucks knowing that your parents won't accept you just for who you are. If you really wanted to come out, I would tell your mom but definitely not your dad, at least not for the time being. I understand how it can be painful being in the closet, but... think of it this way, at least it doesn't effect every aspect of your life, neh?

But hey man. Hang in there. The most important thing is that you accept yourself and stay strong. Also, 10% of the population is g*y. So one in every ten people you see... g*y! You're not alone, and there are other people who feel the same way as you.

Answer 6

Don't hate yourself for being g*y. I think it's a part of you. Be comfortable and accepting of yourself. Killing yourself just because you're g*y doesn't show the society how being g*y is normal and you're definitely letting your parents down (no matter what they think of your sexuality). That said, come out only when you can support yourself. That's the sincerest advice I hope you'll take. It's no fun if your dad throw you out just for that, even if the throwing out ain't permanent. If you can support yourselves, that will lessen the impact. Though I hope your dad will not do it, and come to terms with it. All the best!!

Answer 7

Yes you should to your parents...i wouldnt tell anyone else..

Answer 8

Don't hate yourself dude; you are who you are and don't forget that. You should tell your mom first. Trust me.

Answer 9

With your mom's side, maybe pretend to be innocent about it. Be like really lifetime and be like, Mom, how do you know if you're....g*y? lol. And with your dad's side you should go to his house dressed in full drag and KICK HIS ***. He's probably g*y. Most homophobics are. If either of them have a problem, do what you need to do for you. Being g*y is COMPLETELY normal and ACCEPTABLE. If they do something ridiculous like kick you out or whatever, you can come live with me. Good luck! :-)

Answer 10

If you have to live with your parents, then I would recommend that you do not tell them until you live elsewhere. What might be a good idea is if you find some kind of youth support group or a  friend you trust, and talk to them.

Don't hate yourself, it seems like a hostile world for g**s in your house, but when you are 18 (maybe even sooner) you can move to a place like (for example) Portland Oregon, where you will be accepted by most everyone, so many people to be accepted by that you will hardly notice the ones who don't.