Should I do something about this??

Question

I am 27 and I work with children in a residential setting. I started just over a month ago. There is a group of my coworkers, all around the ages of 20-21 who are friends and go to school together. They are a tight group and they like to talk a lot at work and hang out.

Lately I have been noticing one of the girls is really B**tchy to me for no reason! I have never done anything to any of them. I am always super nice and helpful and try to be social (as much as I can). She just keeps giving me dirty looks and saying rude things to me for no reason.

So my question is....do I say something to her? Do I say something to the supervisor? I don't want to start something that will turn into something worse since she would probably go to all her friends and talk about me then all of them will hate me!

I have found myself staying away from them lately and just doing things in the other room with the kids but that gets kind of dull and I don't want to keep avoiding them.

What do I do???

Answer 1

If its too much of a problem and ignoring her isnt working then just go to the supervisor and let them know what is going on. Saying something to her wont work out to your benefit and will most likely cause a cat fight which makes both of you look bad. Be the bigger person. Sounds to me like she is jealous and is waiting for you to say something back to her in order to get you to look bad. She should know by now that shes too old for such childish behavior. Dont stoop to her level, its not worth it.

Answer 2

I think you are doing the right thing. Don't worry, they are just being immature. I know that you would like to be able to associate with your coworkers on a social level and feel accepted, but sometimes its just better to keep business life and social life separate. They obviously have the problem and I am sure it is nothing that you did. If the woman that acts rude to you continues to make comments or treat you disrespectfully, then calmly address the situation in private. The last thing you need is a scene especially in front of the children and other co-workers. If your little talk with her does not go over well, then take it to your supervisor. The supervisor is there to help make sure that everything runs smoothly in the best interest of the clients and staff. Maybe you can ask to work a different shift than this woman or perhaps move to a different department if that is an option. Good luck.  

Answer 3

Put her on the spot. Ask her to go get coffee with you after work sometime. Since you are older there could be a variety of reasons why she acts that way to you. However, this gives you an advantage to turn the tables on her because it puts her in a situation where she either has to accept or decline...and either choice will make her uncomfortable!

If you work on this you can probably make things better at work...however, there is an age difference and despite all your best efforts it might not ever work out to "fit in" with them...

So give it a shot, and if she turns you down you can force her to bring out her problem with a "why not" question. If she accepts it may give her a chance to see you for the nice person you are.

Answer 4

The next time she says something rude to you, you should pull her aside privately and ask what is her problem with you because you don't appreciate and will not tolerate her disrespect. Say it firmly. If that doesn't work, I would document everything that happens and then take it to a supervisor. You shouldn't care if her friends don't like you. That's not why you work there.