Should I expect him to...?

Question

Should I have tell my boyfriend to surprise me and think of a place and something for me for my birthday or is it just too much to ask for him to do it on his own? I got him something nice for his birthday and took him out without him having to tell me dang thing and he loved all of it. I guess I just wish he would do the same for me instead of me having to explain everything to him. He said he just won't do anything at all if I don't tell him every detail.

Am I just being stupid..Or do I have a little bit of ground to stand on here?

Answer 1

He is being a total jerk.  What fun is it if you have to essentially plan your own birthday.  If he loves you he should want the event to be special.  Telling you he won't do anything is a cop out and mean.  I think you should wait and if he does nothing then do some thing...leave him.

Answer 2

I dated a thoughtless guy that deliberately forgot my birthday once too.  The irritating part was that I attended (twice) a birthday celebration for his sister.  "Mr. Thoughtless" gave his sister a hand made wooden box and she loved it.  I would have appreciated his remembering, acknowledging, or making special plans for my birthday.  I had made a big deal out of his.  And after we broke up (and he bounced back which guys always seem to do) I remembered his thoughtlessness and didn't give him a second chance.  Now I only date guys that know how to treat a girl on her birthday.  Tell your guy that he can either make special plans for the two of you or you'll celebrate when friends that don't treat you like something they've scrapped off the bottom on their shoe.  Stick to your guns!!  Either you resolve the problem surrounding his "can't make plans w/o you spelling out every detail" or you're in for a long horrible relationship/or perhaps a short lived one.  What's up with guys that are too lazy and inconsiderate to make plans on their own?!!  You're definitely not being stupid.  It's hurtful when guys don't feel the need to recognize special occasions.  What happens when you get a big promotion, job offer, or other big significant event in the future?  Will he need a sign that it's time to party.  If so, party on without him.  I'd call him on his declaration that he won't do anything otherwise and leave his butt at home while I celebrated with friends at a nearby bar.  good luck and happy birthday

Answer 3

If he's like most men, you will have to spell it out for him, detail after detail......It's the only way you are going to get what you really want.  

Answer 4

You shouldnt have to tell him to do anything

He should just do it

Answer 5

He sounds lazy. Why can't he figure it out? How old is he? Planning an event for a birthday is not a big deal. Why does he think it is so hard? I wonder what else he can't do on his own?

I agree with you.

Answer 6

us guys mostly just want to make you happy. So either tell him want you want or except whatever he does for you and love it.

Answer 7

poor guy just isnt terribly creative, hes trying to be nice tho