Should I feel sad that my husband can't join us on a family vacation?

Question

Ok, first off I'm TOTALLY relieved. I just finished my finals for the Summer Session and actually I was going in with an A- in Calculus and a B+ in Biology 2. Biology I have in the afternoon but the teacher allowed us to come in on Tuesday and take the final during one of his other classes. I'm hoping for the best (hope hope hope!). Anyway my dad is taking off from work and we will all go to Reno Nevada (Sin City North lol lol) for two days then on to some lake somewheres in Nevada (lol lol) where we will stay in a cabin. I am taking Jamie's little sister with us and the baby of course (Jamie is my wonderful husband and the baby's father lol lol). My mom and dad and 14 year old brother are going too, plus one of his friends (luckily they bought a new 2008 Van (which they won't let me drive). I wish Jamie could go too, I love him soo much and miss him terribly, but he's in Army Infantry and currently deployed. I will see him over Thanksgiving and can't wait. Should I be so enthusiastic about going away for fun and games and he's NOT?

Answer 1

You have absolutely nothing to feel bad about. If he's a good man he'd want you to be with your family and having fun. He is deployed, you can't spend time with him. That doesn't mean you should be at home crying and knitting. He chose the military life, and you did as well. Its sad and neccessary. I come from a military family as well, I've seen the stress its can casue and I've seen this problem first hand before. You need your family and your family needs you.

Just don't cheat on him, and if you leave him you could at least wait until he's home and tell him in person.

Answer 2

Wow...if you ramble like that when he's around, I'm sure he's fine not going.

k

Answer 3

I wouldn't feel bad, it would be different if he could go, but you weren't taking him. It isn't like he is able to go. But you can, and you should, I am sure he would want you to go and have fun.

I recently went out of town to spend time with family, and our son got to meet a lot of his family he has never even seen, my husband couldn't go, but was happy that me and my son were able too.

Have fun!

Answer 4

If he is deployed you have to do eveything without him that is what military wives do. You can't stay in a vacumm or live in a darkened house, just remain faithful and write or call when you can until he returns.  Guilt isn't part of the equation.

Answer 5

What would he want for you?  Yea, I think he'd want you and your child to enjoy yourselves.

Think of him, but enjoy yourselves.

Have fun.

Answer 6

wow if i could decipher that i might be able to tell you. but yeah you should probably feel bad

Answer 7

life does go on but out of respect for Jamie keep your knees together

Answer 8

When my son was in Iraq, he insisted that his wife and baby go where they wanted to go and to be happy doing it.  I am sure he doesn't want you sitting around worrying about him.  

Answer 9

You should be happy and enjoy yourself even though you will miss him. Appreciate him and love him but I don't think you should let the fact that he is not there make you sullen and sad. I'm sure he'd love to be there with you but he wouldn't want you to feel sad while you're on vacation.

Answer 10

you have a usband in high school!!!!???

Answer 11

Yes and no.  You probably miss him as it is (with him being deployed and not at home with you).  But it seems like you have had quite a busy time yourself (school and a baby and a husband who is deployed).  So it is probably time you got a little r&r.  

Your husband would want you to finally have some time to yourself and to have some fun.  He can't be there for obvious reasons.  He probably wishes he was going with you, but he can't.  So go, enjoy yourself, take lots of photo's so you can show him at thanksgiving.

Answer 12

You can feel sad, but that is part of being an Army Wife. I'm sure he would feel the same, and continue living his life if you were in the Army. I'm not sure I understand your last question, but it's a family vacation and you should enjoy it, but you're allowed to miss him.