Should I forgive my dad for hitting me

Question

My dad woke me up at 9 and asked me to do a favor. I said no, and I went back to sleep. He came back in a minute and I was still asleep so he went crazy. He picked up my pillows and kept pounding me from my head to my stomach so I started screaming and crying for help. My sister came and covered my body while my dad started beating her. I yelled "Get the f*ck out of my room" And he yelled I didnt even know what that meant and called me a b*tch. He left the room for a minute and I was shaking and crying and my sister shut and locked the room. He tried to come in again and started slamming the door but soon left. He hasn't been home all day except to get some food for my mom. He cut me fruit and offered it to me but I got up and left and cried. He's been really stressed because he's out of work and my mom says it's my fault for provoking him and that he needed to let out his anger. He's never hit me before but he slaps around my sister sometimes when she misses her curfew. Should I be more understanding or should I ignore him forever? Idk. Before this we were really really close.

Answer 1

The BIBLE SAYS you should honor your mother and father so yes forgive him....pffffffffffffffff.....LOL....h**l no.  Why would you even ask if you should forgive him...

dont you know that was a little extreme.  Your dad has major issues.  NO ONE SHOULD GET AWAY with beating their own kids.  CALL A SOCIAL WORKER TO GO VISIT YOUR HOUSE.  

Remember:  RESPECT SHOULD BE EARNED.  YOUR DAD NEEDS TO EARN YOUR RESPECT for him!!!!!!!  

Answer 2

say to him" i really did not appreciate what you did to me this morning" in a demanding but not loud tone.

if he isnt cooperating or giving you a stupid answer call the child protective services

if you dont want call them yourself then you can tell your counselor that and he/she can call them for you  

Answer 3

Yes, I would forgive him. I asked a question similar to this, and I think you should talk to him about it. Sometimes when I'm asleep I don't know what I'm saying, so I sass my parents without thinking. Tell him that and let him know that you will do him a favor next time. But tell him you don't think it was alright for him to hit you like that. I feel like your sister should talk to him as well, since you said he was beating her.

Answer 4

I do not know how old you are but I do not think hitting is appropriate behaviour  for a parent.

If he is stressed because of unemployment then try to discuss things with your Mum and tell her you feel upset about it.

Your are not responsible for your dad's unemployment.

Find the right moment to talk to him when he is calm.

Answer 5

Forgive yes, forget never. I never got the belt when it wasn't well earned, and I plumbed the depths of how far I could go with the old man. I'm a grandpap now, and although I love my grandkids, they know there's a swat on the butt coming if they are brats. Of course, with Pappy, I swear its a game, and they are little kids looking for attention. If I read this correctly, Dad whacked you with a pillow. Hardly a blunt instrument. F bombs dropped by children don't help defuse a situation. In the other hand, if he beat the snot out of you and your sister with his hands, he'll do it again--generally a worse beating. If you got your butt kicked and your body bruised, its time for that to stop. Family meeting first. If Dad isn't willing to participate, you and your siblings and your Mom best head for the women's shelter. If it happens again, call the law. He'll be angry, but you'll be alive and well. Serious thumpings aren't necessarily verboten, but I'd personally never do "wall to wall counseling" unless the infraction was really severe--dope, guns, criminal activity; that sort of thing. And oh, by the way, of course your Mom is going to support him. You might want to ask her if she's got the back of the hand lately. If this was a singular tempermental explosion on Dad's part, work it out. If there's a pattern, get out of there now.

Answer 6

oh wow. I have never experienced anything like that. How old are y'all? I would give him SEVERAL days to cool off and then talk to him. Tell him you don't like the way he made you feel when he hit you. "I thought you respected me more than that" Tell him what you expect of him.." I expect you to never do this again." Say" I will do better at doing what you ask of me when you ask in a respectful manner...I am a human." If you were close then you letting him know how his actions made you feel and that you are willing to forgive this once may make the relationship stronger but if he does it again I would not settle for that. And your mom should stick up for you but come to think of it if he is pushing you and your sis around your mom knows all to well what he is capable of or she wouldnt stand for it...I'm sorry you have to go through that...its not right.

Always know that there are resources out there for you and your sister for being abused...also know that there will be changes in your life if you decide to ever go that route. Once you make that decision, you will have to stand for it and know that no matter what ppl think or try to convince you you are doing the right thing.  

Answer 7

ok i had to put up with that with my dad i told  my teacher when i was 14 so now I'm out of that it may be hard to tell an adult but no one should be in a position like that DONT forgive him there is NO excuse for that EVER  you need to get you and ur sister out of that  you may feel bad but you will live ok  forget ur mom she sounds like shes tryin to stand up for him UR HER BLOOD you should be her #1!!!!! now im 17 and my dad is in prison not because of me Because his anger was not controled and he hit my step mom i mean BAD====if i would of stayed in that it could of been me i felt bad but it paid off in the long time  

Answer 8

ok, you should probably tell the police or something, hitting people is not ok even if is just lightly which i dont think this was, if he was hurting you and your mother just blames you then maybe your family should go to counciling this is a major thing not something to be playing with, now its just hitting but what will happen if he gets more stressed out? what i would do is call someone a realative or even the police and talk to them about it. then go home and if he does ask you to do something DO IT not matter what, do not ignore him that will just make him more agressive and angry dont swear to him, but try not to talk to him only reply if he asks you a question.... but really if your mom is not going to help its probably because she is scared of him hurting her. call someone on your mothers side of the family like an aunt or grandparent and if you have to call a grandparent on the dads side of the family see what they have to say.... you could even call child abuse talking to a police would be good thought to.

I hope that helped a little....

Answer 9

no, your mom really needs to understand that your father is abusing you and your family and you guys need to talk to him or do something about it.

--good luck

Answer 10

Find a trusted youth counselor or pastor at church or another trusting adult to talk to. It seems to me like the pressures of home are stressing everyone out. Your dad might find help from your state's employment agency. You might try to find a friend or a trusted adult to stay with while your dad goes through his job search b/c he is really stressed. His stress does not give him the right to hit you, your sister, or your mom. That is abuse. Get out of the house until he finds a job.    

Answer 11

TEll you om about it if it get rly serious call the police its child abuse just explain your case to them they will totally understand and they know what your going thru tons of kids like you have abusive parents !

Encourage family friends whom your dad trusts to encourage him to get some help from a therapist of psychologist it might be work related stress because he doesn't have a job just let him know you are there for him and support his career path be persuasive and encourage jobs that might work out for him!  

Answer 12

Ok first of this is ILLEGAL! That is now child abuse in America. (Before it was legal punishment.) You should really report this to the police. And your mom is wrong she should be defending you. While was hitting you how much was the pain. If it felt like a pillow fight slap then you should forgive him, but whatch out for him. If the pain was intense and felt like your a*s being kicked by a bully, then REPORT IT! I'm sorry for what he did to you and hope you are ok. I also suggest staying over a friends house temporary. My friend's mom and stepdad get drunk every Friday so before they get home from the club or whatever she would stay over at a friends until Saturday noon. Hope everything works out at your place. Be careful.

Hope i helped.

Answer 13

He went about punishing you all the wrong way.  What you did was wrong because you disobeyed and you backtalked.  I would never had said no to my dad much less cursed at him.  

He shouldn't have beat you with the pillow or cursed at you that was VERY WRONG.

He SHOULD have spanked your rear for doing all that or depending on your age grounded you.  

Talk to him about it and tell him how you feel and tell him you hate seeing your sister be slapped around.  He may need some therapy.

I was raised with spankings until I was to old then I started getting grounded and I love my parents and will raise my children the same way.  The punishment has to be with love not what your dad did in a rage.

Answer 14

i think you have a big problem an it's not going to go away any time soon but this does not give your dad the right to hit you or you sister

you should not ignore your dad he needs all the help he can get

try sitting down an talking to him, just tell him he needs help with all the stress an he needs to find a job.

Answer 15

well i can see that he is stressed from not working but it gives him no right to do that to you and what a mother to be to blame there child for him/her getting hit like that..Men have an ego and he's not going to big it up to you again what he has done cause he knows he did wrong. If this keeps going on call the police or OCS. you didn't provoke him, he took the "no" and blew up on you, it's not right. name calling i don't take very well, i was verbally abused the whole life till i was 19. It's abuse just like anything else you just can't see it like physical abuse. You should speak to someone about your feelings and i think your father needs to apologies to you and man up to his mistakes. If your a forgiving person, forgive him that's up to you.

The fruit was maybe a "sorry" but i think he needs to express that in another way or he was just testing you to see if you were mad at him. Let it cool off for a lil bit and see what happens but he needs to apologies. He's got anger issues as my "father" does. I feel your pain and it hurts me to see someone else go through these things.

If he needs to lef his anger out he needs to get a punching bag not his daughter/son.

I wish you the best and good luck to you

Remember to stick up for yourself and don't take c**p from anyone even if they are your parents noone deserves to be treated that way