Should I get engaged?

Question

My boyfriend was in some trouble with the cops that wasn't his fault. He was in a car accident that wasn't his fault anyways that's besides the point. He might go back or be on parole and that would really suck. Also financially we are neither in a good spot right now. He does HVAC and it's really hard for him to find work. I only work part time. We understand that and do not planning on getting married right away. We plan on waiting at least a year or two and paying off debts and saving. My question is, is that would getting engaged still be a responsible idea? We've been together four years and I'd really like to take that next step, but I don't think it should mean that we'd have to get married right away. Share your thoughts.

Answer 1

if you guys are gonna wait a couple of years then you should wait to get ingaged in case anything happens  

Answer 2

I think things are a lot worse than you are even writing in your question. Do you always find yourself making excuses for your boyfriend ("it wasn't his fault" and "it's really hard for him to find work")? And now he might go BACK on parole? Meaning he's already been in trouble?

Honestly, I think you're heading for a lot more bad times. You can get engaged if you want, but I don't think it sounds like things are ever going to be great with a guy like this.

By the way, I've never seen anyone in HVAC have trouble finding work. I've seen people get offered $500 and $1,000 bonuses after their third month staying with a company, as well as offers to move to another city (paid by a company). I think your boyfriend might be sort of the loser-type, unfortunately. I bet you could do much better.

No, you should not get engaged until both of you have been working full-time for at least 6 months, you are on a budget, and you are climbing your way out of debt. I honestly don't see that happening, though.

Answer 3

Heyy,

I guess you should pray and God will give you the right opition to take... None of us are able to say go ahead or stop where you're...

I encourage you to pray and God will tell you what to do!!

Answer 4

I think that it's kind of pathetic that you're asking this question on the internet..

That is up to your boyfriend and you.

You should be able to make decisions without having to ask on the internet.

Answer 5

So I don't really understand what the other people who answered your question were thinking...so I just have to give you my personal opinion based off of what you said...I think that you should hold off on getting engaged...I think that it puts more pressure on your relationship. You guys seem like you have some small major problems that you really want to handle before trying to get married and I guess start a family. I don't think that you all not being engaged will be a problem...you have been together for four years. The next step you all should take is getting your small major problems together like getting FULL TIME JOBS...staying away from the cops and paying of debts and stacking up on some savings. Well these are just my thoughts...hope I helped and sorry if I sound rude...Its just my thoughts.

Answer 6

You need to be able to support a family before you start one so getting married any time soon is a bad idea. If you do get married you'll struggle really hard for a long time...maybe for your whole life. You should focus on bettering your lives now and worry about marriage later...much later. College would be good. Trust me, it'll pay off to wait until you're doing good financially.