Should I have a lock on his door

Question

My 10 year old son constantly wakes up early, before me. He has opened our door to strangers and takes my 18 month old daughter out of her crib and sometimes takes her downstairs to the living room. All while I am still sleeping. I don't know what to do anymoe, is it a good idea to put a hook and eye look on his door?

Answer 1

This is a tough one. On the one hand he is doing things that are potentially dangerous without supervision, but on the other what happens if he feels sick or has to use the restroom in the middle of the night and is locked in his room?

As for the front door, you can fairly easily install a deadbolt that requires a key to unlock from EITHER side. Simply install and keep the key in your room at night until you wake up. This should stop him from being able to open the door at all.

Taking your daughter downstairs- you could try taking away some of his privileges each time he does this? I would be very hesitant to lock either child up in his/her room.

Answer 2

I can see why you are worried. It's scary to think that anybody could be coming into your house when you are asleep, and for all the people who said "get up with your kids" maybe she has to stay up late to clean, or whatever, and is tired! Maybe her son wakes up really early! There is no reason to be so rude.

I wouldn't suggest putting the lock on his door, only because if he needs to use the bathroom or something, he'll be unable to. Perhaps, though, you could somehow limit the area of the house for which he can get into. A locking gate in front of the baby's room or the front door? I'm not suree how you would go about that but it could work.

Also, just continuously try and speak with him about why he shouldn't answer the door for strangers, why he shouldn't be getting the baby, what could happen when he does those things. Try not to yell, talk sternly but nicely, it will keep him attentive and help him to get your point. If he continues to do it, give him punishments. Let him know, ahead of time, what the consequences will be if he does these things. And stick to them if he does the action.

I really hope I helped.

And I'm sorry that others have given you such rude responses.

Please don't give up on YA!

We aren't all bad.

I swear [=

Answer 3

Just tell him if the doorbell rings to come and get you. NO CHILD NEEDS TO BE LOCKED IN A ROOM LIKE THAT!

Answer 4

Unless he has some type of mental condition, you need to TRAIN him.  He is 10 years old, not a toddler so he should understand.  He only does it because you allow him to do it.  Unless you put your foot down and start being the parent, he will constantly rule you.  You should not let a lock be the parent for you.  I mean locking him in his room can be dangerous.  What if he needs to go to the bathroom or go to the kitchen or gets sick?  He just needs to know the rules and stick by them.  I never understand why people are so afraid of their own kids.  Then they wonder why they end up on Nanny 911.  :)

Answer 5

Short of cloning yourself, it's hard to know what to do! Perhaps a hook an eye lock on your babies door would be better-then your 10 year old will still have the freedom to get up wearly and go downstairs but you don't need to worry as much about the baby.

Have a word with him too-he is, unfortunately, old enough to understand about the dangers out there so tell him! Say you trust him totally but it's other people you don't trust and wory that if he takes the baby downstairs, he might not know what to do if something happens.

As for those saying get up with your kids-oh come on. Parents do actually have to close their eyes to sleep you know. I seldom hear my eldest son getting up in the mornings (he is 11) though i hear the baby (he sings in his cot) and the 8 year old (d**n he is loud...). Parents need sleep too!!!

Don't give up on here, some people can be understanding...Some can't but the world is full of picky people!!! Good luck!

Answer 6

I think less than locking him up, you should teach him how to behave with his baby sister and who to open the door to.  10 years old is plenty old enough to know those things.  Have a family password for the door.  (as in dont open it unless they know the password)

OR, omg, get up when your kids do!!!!

Answer 7

If your child is not autisic or something else, then I would suggest teaching him not to do such things.  If he is autisic and you lock him in, that will just freak him out.  It's not really a good idea to do that either way.  What if he wakes up during an emergency and you don't?  He can't come and warn you.  Apparently, you can't hear when the kids get up (I can!) and so I don't think its a good idea to lock him in.

Edit:  Wow that was a harsh comment.  Nothing I said deserved that.  If you don't want the opinions of strangers, then please don't ever use Yahoo answers again.  Thank you.

Answer 8

you should figure out about when he wakes up and set your alarm to wake up about half an hour before he does. Locking your child in his room is not only a fire hazard but also I do not think its right. He is not really doing anything wrong he is trying to take care of everything until you wake up. Sit down and have a talk with him about answering the door when your not awake and about taking his sister out of her crib without permision. Do not scold him for what he is doing. Thank him for trying to be a help around the house but let him know your concerns and worries. But I suggest you need to start waking up before your children do so he doesn't feel he needs to take responsiblity around the house so you can sleep.

Answer 9

Lock your 18 month old daughters door and install a new lock on your front door. Your 10 year old can take care of himself in the morning. Have a firm talk with him about why these things are bad and to not do them again. Or you can wake up when he does.  

Answer 10

I agree with Carissa, there are rude people who just like to be rude.  I am too sorry that you have to read such bad remarks.  Back to the question.  When my son was around 8 years old he walked in his sleep.  We didn't realize that the things he was doing was while he was asleep until we took him to a sleep specialist.  It was really scary.  He would get up in the middle of the night, get into everything and also would open the doors and go outside.  One night in the middle of a storm he went out and I didn't know it until the phone rang.  It was terrifying and that is when we decided to take him to the doctor.  After that we went to the local Lowes and bought an alarm for the front door that went off when the door was open.  No pass word needed.  You can also buy the small alarms to put on bedroom doors that would be idea for your babies room if your son went in the bedroom the alarm would go off enough to wake you up.  Hope this helps.  GOOD LUCK.  

Answer 11

my son has always been an early bird,,which was particularly hard for me as his twin sister was a night owl.  he would get up around 5 after his sister had just fallen asleep at 1.  we had a hook and eye on the front door just in case.  he never tried to go outside, but we were always worried "what if".  (this was when they were toddlers 2.3.4 years old).  i had baby monitors all over the house, but he was a very quiet and good boy when he got up. many times i never heard him.  honestly i would not lock him in, but rather move a lock higher up on the front door.  at 10 you should be able to have a serious and strict conversation with him about not answering the door or phone.  

i know alot of people on here are self rightous and condesending, but kepe your head up,,you are not a bad mom.  children are children and do crazy things.  i know when i first started surfing YA i thought i was the worst parent on the face of the earth, i ate/did things when i was pregnant that i guess are bad and should never be done, i breast AND bottle fed, i made homemade baby food,  i never coslept, i allowed my children to drink juice/soda, i let my kids play outside from sun up to sun down, i have spanked, i have slapped mouths,  i have grounded them, my kids use the computer, have video games, my husband has guns in the home (he is a cop), the list could go on and on, but ya know what,,,my kids are happy healthy normal well adjusted intelligent children with good manners and respect for others.  i am raising my children  the way i want to and do NOT care what others think.  if more people worried about their own families and their own kids, then the world would work alot better.  do NOT let others pass judgement on you noone lives in your shoes.

first i would have a serious talk with your son about what he is allowed and not allowed to do in the mornings before you are up.  no answering the door,,no answering the phone, no stove/cooking/cutting etc.  set some rules and enforce them with punishment.  if that is not working i would put a latch higher up on the door of the house, not his room.  try and explain to him the dangers of opening the door etc.  tell him he is NOT allowed to get your daugther out with OUT your permission.  try and use a baby monitor in the living room or in his room so you can hear what is going on.  i know as a mother if i hear something out of the "normal" it wakes me up.  i always had one ear open,,,still do and my "babies" are now 11.  

good luck and keep your head up,,,it will all be ok.

Answer 12

The best thing is to tell your son to not let ANYONE in the house unless it is a family member.  You do not need to lock him in his room. That is considered abuse.  

Answer 13

Let Him Do What He Wants! He's 10, Not 3!

Answer 14

Oh yeah...locking them in.  What about a fire?  Who give a c**p you can sleep thru it, he has the baby out.

   He is 10.  You can talk to him.  Give him an alarm clock which you set the rising time ring.  He can't come out before then.   "You are training him".    It is a game, he has to win.(in order to get the cookie or whatever....but you get to sleep till 6am.  That is late enough in the summer months..