Should I have left him last year?

Question

He told me during an argument, when I found out that he still talked to his ex-girlfriend, weekly or sometimes more often, that he had more loyalty to her than to me and don't ask him to make an ultimatum regarding our relationship. Now, a year later, he has put the ultimatum on me. I have a bit of a temper and I yelled at an out-of-line teenager. I wasn't too adultish, but what's done is done, right? I can't go back and change it. But he said that he could not continue our relationship, oh, but can we still be friends? Well, I left my 40K year job for him, moved a state away and had a huge custody battle with the father of my girls because of it! I'm still paying for my attorney! Should I have left him last year? What signs was I missing?

Answer 1

yes you should if he likes her ...more than you.. get rid of the JURK now ..hes not worth it anyway..   good luck..  

Answer 2

Look at the end of the day if we allcould see what the future holds we do things differently hower you made the choice and it dint work out,my advice is not to be to hasty stay put awhile were you are,raise those kids and wjen your ready you will meet and love again

Also if you got a job like that in the past you can do it again and first thing is to try to get debt free  

Answer 3

Well his close continued friendship with his old girl friend is out of line.  Your throwing everything away for him was just stupid.  Your children should have been more important to you then some guy you hardly knew.  Better get yourself together for the sake of your children.

Answer 4

The same sign I did, and millions of other women have too. We refused to see it(that's why they say love is blind)HE DID NOT PLACE YOU FIRST, the first thing he did was put you in your place..Then dare you to move. You should have left him the very moment he challenged you. He lost respect for you because you stayed. You can't love a man more than you love yoursrself. Sacrifice is a two way street.  Staying just set the stage..he does what he wants, you do what he wants, and if you're good he'll toss you a treat now and then. We train people how to treat us, by not standing up for ourselves, they walk over our hearts..They can...only cuz we allow it. Stay true to yourself, know you're worth first place, and don't settle for less.  It's not mean, it's not selfish, it's having dignity.  

Answer 5

When he brought up his ex, you should of checked him.  tell him stop acting like a little *****.  if he can't accept you for who you are, he will get over it.  what type of person leaves someone over something so stupid, unless they already wanted to leave.  you foolishly gave up your life for a man, thats your fault.  never give up your own stability

Answer 6

I THINK BOTH OF U HAVE COMMITTED MISTAKES BUT SORRY BEING ORTHODOX , U SHOULD HAVE MADE APRIPER JUDGEMENT AT THE PROPER TIME  

Answer 7

the thing you missed, because you were in love, was that he had loyalty to another woman more than you. Of course you didn't to hear it, so you didn't. And the other thing you may not have noticed is that he has issues with control. but don't be crying over spilled milk--what is done is done. You thought you were doing the best thing last year. Now you realize you weren't. At least now you will see things more clearly for the future. Move back if you wish, start your life over again. And whatever you do, don't feel sorry for the guy and take him back once he realizes you're really gone and wants you back. He'll just play you again. (The only reason I'd even consider taking him back would be if he moved states and quit a job for you. he's got to show he's committed to you in a big way!)

PS--stop beating yourself up over this. We all do stupid things when we love someone.