Should I help him out? If so, how much help should I give?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been having problems over the last few weeks. Nothing really major, it’s just not working out and we are on the verge of breaking up. Last night, his apartment flooded and he has a total loss. All of his belongs (furniture, clothing, etc. are damage) with sewer water. Also all the cash he had is gone too. (He doesn’t like to keep his money in bank accounts). He hasn’t asked yet, but I have a feeling he’s going to ask to stay at my house. I can’t help him out monetarily, but if the least I could do his provide a roof over his head, should I? Because the relationship is already not working and I am ready to break up with him, I don’t think that would be a good idea. But if he doesn’t have anywhere to go, I would feel bad about not helping in out. What would you do?

Answer 1

Well i would help him out you never know he may change when you help him and it could last a long time between the 2 of you. There is also the chance it can really suck. He should have apartment insurance and they should give him money for all his items and another room to stay in.

Answer 2

give him a place to stay for 2 or 3 days max.  Make it clear that this is only for 2 or 3 days and he needs to find someplace else to go.  (I don't believe that bit about the money either)

Answer 3

I'd help him out but not share the bed, it overely complicates things & you also have to let him know that it's only temporary until he's soted. Good luck :-)

Answer 4

This is a tough one. For sure, I don't think I would offer for him to stay with you. If he asks you, I would say you don't think that is a good idea. Does he have no friends or family anywhere? Does he have a job, that would provide the means needed to find another apartment? Would his landlord be responsible for the flooding of his apartment or allow him to move into another apartment until he is on his feet again?

Sounds strange about the cash and clothes and other belongings being a total loss. Some of these things it seems could be washed and salvaged until they can be replaced. I would be a little suspicious of his motives if he asks to move in with you. There are churches that help people find a place to stay and I don't know if the YMCA still offers rooms for people or not, but, it might be worth checking into something like this. Good luck to you and I hope you find a solution that works out for both of you.