Should I help my former boss?

Question

Just a little background info...

I'm a personal in-home fitness trainer. I used to have a 2nd job working where my boyfriend currently works. I decided to quit that job due to conflicts with the new boss.

Today, my boyfriend had a proposal for me... my ex-boss wants to hire ME as her personal trainer so she can get in shape before her wedding.

My initial reaction was "you've got to be kidding me!" She's the main reason I left that job... I simply can't stand her, much less want to help her get in shape!

To get to the point, my boyfriend thinks I should just put my differences aside and take the job, but I think it's just so he doesn't have to let her down so to speak.

What do you think? Am I being childish for not wanting to take on this proposition?

Answer 1

You don't like her, you don't respect her, and you already know you don't want to work with her.  So don't take her on as a client.  Why would you want to commit yourself to putting up with her one or two or three hours a week for the next 2 or 3 months?

True, her money is just as green as anyone else's.  But her personality isn't going to be different.  Money isn't the answer to everything, and it isn't a good reason for ANYTHING. And it sure isn't a good reason to be stressed and frustrated.

A simple, "I'm very flattered that she thinks so highly of me.  I'm sorry I won't be able to work with her for her wedding" is all you need to tell your boyfriend.

Answer 2

Her money is just as green...I've worked with people that I ABSOLUTELY hated but I was nice and stuck with it till I found something else. If you do take it, just put her through the ringer of a routine! I think making her exercise like h**l while you just stood and watched would be fantastic!

That'd get back at her for being such a lousy boss.

Answer 3

No, you have every right not wanting to work with her again.

However, you can temporarily "forget" how rude she was to you if the payment is good. If she is going to pay you a good money then take it, if not, tell her you can't help her and you're sorry.

Depends on her offer and how much is she willing to pay you for the training.

Or you can tell her straight you can't help her without telling her anything else.

Answer 4

I think you are being childish.

Just take the job and don't worry much about her, or the reason why you quit your old job.

If she keeps on going about it or becomes annoying then you'll just stop training her.

Answer 5

If you quit a job because of her, then you have a right to be hesitant in taking a proposal like that, and it's unfair that your boyfriend is putting you in this type of situation to begin with. Does he have no regard as to how you feel and why you left that job in the first place?

It's important to love what you do and be happy doing it. And if by training this woman means that you will be uncomfortable and tense, then I say don't do it. I wouldn't do anything that made me feel uncomfortable. No matter who it was for. Boyfriend, or husband, or family member. That lady can easily get someone else, or just go to the gym and get a personal trainer there.

The simple answer...NO you are not being childish.  :-)  It's ok to say, "NO" and not subject yourself to potential discomfort and tension. Stand your ground. You're not wrong in this.  

Answer 6

when you're training her, hurt her on purpose and tell her its just part of the process.

if you don't want to help her, that's your choice. its called Karma, if you don't treat anybody the way you want to be treated, then don't expect people to do favors for you. i wouldn't help her.

Answer 7

Grin and bear it- it could really help your boyfriend and maybe even get him a better position.

Answer 8

If she knows why you left your job and that you don't like her don't take the offer.  If she has no idea why you left or just doesn't know the real reason then take the offer.  If you turn her down be sure to do it POLITELY ("I'd love to but...) so it doesn't effect your boyfriend's job.

Answer 9

I think your boyfriend is being selfish by volunteering you to do this.  He would rather you be uncomfortable for the duration of training her instead of him being uncomfortable for the small duration of him telling her no/nevermind.  Tell him to make up an excuse and to ask you first next time.  You're not the one being childish, the situation is unusual / socially awkward.  

Answer 10

Just think this time you are helping her and get compensated for your effort instead working FOR her.  She won't be your boss, just someone paying you for a service.

Answer 11

Good grief kiddo you're not being childish.  Don't take the position!  You would hate every minute you were there....  OOops, I just had a  *brain revelation*

On second thought this could be a great opportunity.  Being a fitness trainer you could give her exercises that would really pack on the muscle and the weight!   You could even slip in some steroids while you're at it.

Who knows what that the end product would look like?  Do you believe in Karma?  *hehehe*

Okay, okay.  You were wanting a serious answer.  No, don't take the position . As a personal trainer there has to be good chemistry between you and your clients.  Your attitude is just as important as the clients.  You would not want to accidentally drop a dumbbell on top of her head because your inner psyche was wishing for that would you?  I'm serious- save yourself the aggravation and make up an excuse why you aren't available.  I don't think you're being childish by declining.  You're being smart.

Answer 12

I would not do it. tell them that you are too busy right now to make an exception would make you grumpy & uncomfortable. what happens when she wants it to be a wedding gift & not pay you or pay you less?  

Answer 13

Heck yes take the job. Put her through the mill. Make her work her butt off and your getting paid for it. Sounds like good revenge to me.