Should I just bluntly tell him that I need to be alone?

Question

I am grieving over the stillbirth death of my first grandchild,which occured on August 9.I have 4 children,3 are younger than my daughter who had the stillborn baby,and are at home/school age.I have very little time alone.I cherish any solitude that I can get,especially now.I enjoy gardening a great deal,but EVERY single time I go to try to water,weed,etc...and just think,pray,meditate too,my retired neighbor comes over and starts to tell me about all his health problems.etc.Normally in the past,I would chat friendly with him...but now I am in no mood to do so.He is married,and they often have visitors over,so it is not a case of loneliness.Should I just tell him that I need time to myself and I hope he understands?

Answer 1

u really need to tell him, u obviously dont want to talk to him right now. tell him wats happened and tell him u need time alone at the moment. even if u dont tell him wat happened u can just say somethin personal happened and u need time alone. he really should understand, every1 needs time alone now and then

Answer 2

You could certainly do that, and I'm sure he WILL understand.  Even if you don't go into details you could just say something like "Ed, recently we had some bad family news that I'm not prepared to talk about yet since it's so painful.  Would you really mind giving me some time alone?  I really need time to get my thoughts together and we'll talk again soon, okay?"  I'm sure he'll be grateful you were honest and give you plenty of alone time.  Sorry about the baby.

Answer 3

That is a tough postition, but I think if you talked with him telling him that you need a little think time right now and he knows the circumstances that he would respect your privacy.  Sorry for your loss and good luck  

Answer 4

Try, " Thanks for stopping by, but I'm feeling a little sad right now and would like to be alone to meditate and pray." You could add something like, " When I'm feeling more like myself, I'll have you over for a cup of coffee and we can chat then." If he gives you your space, be sure to follow up on your invitation (if you extend it.) If he doesn't get the hint, excuse yourself and go inside.  When he leaves, go back out.  If that doesn't work, simply tell him you aren't able to visit and he will have to leave.  

Answer 5

Is he aware of you grief?  If he is maybe that is his way of reaching out to you.  But if you want to gently let him know that although you appreciate his friendship right now you just need some time alone.  He should understand.  

My condolences to you and your family.  

Answer 6

i would tell him wat has happened to me in the past couple of days and tell him to leave me alone for a while so that i can get over this tragedy. so just nicely tell him to give some time alone of what has happened to you in the past couple of days.

i hope this has helped you.

Answer 7

Tell him that you need to be alone, and explain why. He should respect you and what your going through. You don't need to hear about his problems. That's why he has a wife for. I'm sooo sorry about your loss.