Should I keep my indiscretion a secret?

Question

Ok Xmas 2 years ago my hubby and I were having some time apart - I went to my works christmas party - got insanely drunk and slept with a co worker. It happened once and once only, I've not ever done it again, I don't know why I did it, I certainly didn't have feelings for this guy or anything like that. My husband and I reconciled and are doing really well right now, probably in the best spot we've ever been. We're talking about having another baby. I want to know whether I should tell him about my indiscretion? Or should I just leave things the way they are. We've been together since we were teenagers - and I'd not been with anyone else other than him - except for this one guy. Please help me. I feel like I want to do the right thing and tell him, but am so scared of losing everything that we've built together....

Answer 1

Of course, YOU DON'T TELL HIM!!!!!   He'll never forgive you and you're just wanting to place your guilt onto him.  You'll feel better - he'll wish he never met you!!!

Don't tell him!!!

Answer 2

Telling him only hurts him.  Keep it to yourself.

Answer 3

Do you want to make yourself feel better or do you want to hurt your husband?  Only you know that answer and only you know what you're going to do.  

Answer 4

only you can truly answer that question. Someone else telling you that its ok to keep it a secret wont make it any better if it makes u feel bad to keep it a secret. If it is true that u were both having time apart when it happened, then I strongly believe he does not need to know. How could it help him knowing that now ? If you have worked through your problems and are both happy, then u should forgive yourself and let it go

Answer 5

You should store this one in your heart.

Don't tell him - absolutely nothing good can come of telling him, nothing at all. You can't undo what you did two years ago, which, after all, was a one-off encounter which you recognise was a moment of extraordinarily bad judgement, and you've never done anything like it before or since.

If you tell him, you'll hurt him, badly, out of all proportion to the significance of what happened. I know it will 'unburden' you, in a sense, because you won't have it kept as a secret anymore, and perhaps the telling of it may appease a little of the guilt you currently feel. But are you really ready to deal with the unfathomable pain you'll cause your husband, the insecurity and jealousy it will stir in him, the distrust that will be newly evident in the way he looks at you and treats you?

Don't tell. If you need to leave the area to get away from the job, the coworker, the risks of it being uncovered, and the shameful memories - do it. Build a new life somewhere else with your husband - the man who first won your heart as a teenager. Don't let this one indiscretion mar your chance and his at future happiness.

Answer 6

unless this is a private yahoo id your husband doesn't know about i would delete this and never ever tell him what happened.  you were separated  when it happened, dont burden him with it at this point!

Answer 7

That is something you have to search your soul for.  In time be it tomorrow or ten years from now the truth always comes out,  if it were me I would not tell him, what he doesn't know will not hurt him.  

Answer 8

I think if you were separated at the time of the "indiscretion", you don't really need to tell him as it will only hurt him and you weren't together at the time. If it happened while you were trying to reconcile that's a different story.  I'm just hoping you were safe- have you had an STD test? You don't want your husband to find out by defult, learning he has contracted an STI from his wife.

Answer 9

I hate to say it, but I think the best thing is to tell him. Although if you have kept it a secret for 2 years then its kind of faded. Its up to you, but a word of advice, if he can read this I'd delete it asap.

:)

Good luck !!

Answer 10

you will only make yourself feel a lil better gettin it off your chest...keep quiet and turn your attn to him and making him happy. nothin good will come of it.dont be so hard on yourself and move on