Should I stay out of it?

Question

My sister is going back to collage in another state, about 9 hours away for where we live now. She asked me to help her by going down with her to find an apartment. Somehow our mother got involved, took over and all they seem to do is argue and p**s each other off. We all went and it was h**l. I told my sister that when it was time to move her, I was not coming back with them, its too much fussing. She begged me to come and help her move, but it seems our mother has taken over so what do she need me for now.

Answer 1

You said that they argue and p**s each other off. She wants you so that she will have an ally on her side, your support, or just someone to balance the fussing or effect of your mother.

Answer 2

You agreed to help her find an apartment and you did. You did not agree to anything else.

Given these circumstances I would tell your sister that either you help or Mother helps but that a threesome in this is not possible for you anymore. Make sure she understands 2 things: you are always there for her if she needs you, but it has to be you alone and, also, that you are entitled to a life without all this aggravation.

Best wishes. UK

Answer 3

Take a book, take a whistle, take a Ipod.  If they start arguing again, blow the whistle and say time out!  If that doesn't work, read the book or plug in in the Ipod.