Should I take my daughter to school or make her ride the bus?

Question

My daughter is 9 and is having trouble with the neighborhood bullies. They call her names, steal her toys, tried to tear up her bike, and are constantly harrassing her and my family. They ring my door bell 5 times a night and run off.

If she rides the bus she will have to deal with them everyday. I know possibly the bus driver might put a stop to it but he has many kids to watch and the road also. I don't want it to look like she's afraid of them because they might treat her worse if they think they won but i don't want her scared everyday either.

Answer 1

I think you should take her to school.  You may also want to tell the school about the bullies.

Answer 2

Schools have anti-bullying rules for a reason.  It's a clear cut rule that all our schools here have.  Talk to the principal and tell them what is going on.  That she is being bullied and name the names.  They will put a stop to it.  The bully's parents don't care.  That's why they are bullys.

Answer 3

This is a situation that can really shape her school environment. I say let her keep going on the bus. I agree to let her sit with friends, preferably in front, and talk to the bus driver. I would also contact the school, and their parents. Then if that does not work, tell their parents that you are going contact the authorities if the children keep harassing you and your family at home. Tell you child to not show her fear. Bullies love it. Tell her it is ok to be afraid and that lots of people have gotten bullied before. Tell her that it will pass. It will, and eventually they will find someone else to pick on. AS long as she stands her ground and walks away from them, she is the bigger person. Good luck!

Answer 4

put a camera up at your door. get them on tape and turn it in. this is harrassment.

then take that child to school, she has enough to contend with, serious, life is much too stressful to allow this to continue and her to have to worry further over a simple solution..

love that child.

I'd sure show her how to peacefully and lawfully take care of bullies.

Answer 5

Take her to school, at least until the bullying is under control. Bus drivers can only do so much to help the kids...their primary responsibility is to drive safely. And so much happens on those buses that the drivers don't even know about. Better safe than sorry...

Answer 6

She's only 9, I would take her to school myself.

When she'll be a litlle older and able to defend herself, she might take the bus.

Why are the neighbourhood kids so bad to her? Aren't there any girls of her age who want to play with her and be her friend? Making friends is important.

Answer 7

She's only nine.  It's time for you to stand up for her.  Let the school and the kid's parents know what is going on.  Let the parents & their kids know that if their children continue to harrass her then you will file a complaint against them and press charges.  If you know who is ringing your bell then as soon as they do it, march straight up to their house and talk with the parents.  Let these kids know that they are trespassing when on your property and you will call the cops if necessary.  The best way I have found for dealing with troublesome kids is to get right up in their face and let them know that they are NOT going to get away with it.  Once they know you mean business they will leave you and your daughter alone.  This may all sound harsh but I have been through this with problematic kids in my old neighborhood.  Eventually they all learned that I was not going to back down from them and had no fear of speaking with their parents or the police if necessary.  You may want to take her to school from time to time, especially at the beginning of the year.  But you should also speak with the bus driver and let them know what is going on.  They can assign seats and make sure your daughter is in one of the front seats.  Taking a proactive stance on this will not make them think they have "won".  But it will make them think twice before starting any trouble with your family.

Answer 8

contact the school!!! this is not okay!

Answer 9

Are you able to drive  her with your schedule? I am a SAHM so I always take my kids and pick them up that is part of why we wanted me to be home with them.

I would say take her if you can keep taking her, but don't try it as a short term fix. But if you can keep it up all year then why not. I love talking to my kids as soon as they get out of school. Or just watching them walk in and out, it is so cute.

Answer 10

Talk to the bus driver and have him put her in the seat behind him.  She will be safe there.

With the price of gas, you don't want to be taking your kids to school.  Also taking your daughter to school would be paramount to these children bullying you into doing something you don't want to do.

Put her on the bus, inform the driver of the situation, and also inform her teacher.  Then inform the children's parents of the situation.  

I remember as a kid, some kids that kept ringing our doorbell and running away.  Dad rewired the doorbell and the kids got a nice little shock when they touched it.  (and the best part was that they went home, told their parents and the parents came to yell at my parents.... and got shocked too.... darn faulty doorbells anyhow)

Answer 11

Driving her to school everyday will enable the bullies in a way, because they will know they are scaring her and that it is working.

Does the bus have a camera? If so, call the bus companty and have them review the tapes.

Have her sit in the front of the bus, and with a friend, if any ride her bus, so she'll have support and also be right in back of the driver.

If they harrass your family, call their parents, and let them know where their kids are at night.

Answer 12

Bus drivers are ill-equipped to deal with all the problems kids cause on the bus.  It's not their fault--it's just more than one person should be expected to handle.  When my boys were riding the bus to school, they had a terrific driver who set up a system where the older students were his "proctors" and were each assigned a younger student to sit with on the bus.  They were to be his helpers in keeping the rules, and if that didn't happen the parents were told that their student couldn't ride the bus any more.  With gas so expensive, I totally understand the dilemma about whether to drive every day when a bus is available.  If your bus driver doesn't have an adult helper to ride and help keep order, or isn't open to trying something like what I described, and you feel like it's unsafe to send her on the bus, you might ask around to see if there are other families who would want to carpool and thus split both the gas and time expense of driving her.  This is a hard decision, I know--I wish you the best.

Answer 13

I think you should take them off 20% earlier than usual just in case for bullying cases, A better chance is take them to the principal, They might take care of it. If the neighbors go in to the same school. Maybe there is a scheme or some people have a bad problem against it. I think you need to fix your daughter.

Answer 14

I'd drive her to school and if those kids ring your doorbell like five times a night then you should call the cops on them. After they get yelled at by the cops then they would be more hesitate to do it again.

Answer 15

drive her pleaseeeeeee:)

Answer 16

i would drive her to school and contact the school about the behavior so that they can put a stop to it. also, contact their parents because you don't want your daughter to continue going through this!

good luck and hope this helps!!!

Answer 17

I'd drive her, and make it known to the principal, bus driver, and police if necessary, why you are doing so!

Answer 18

I took the bus, and I learned some pretty nasty things about s*x, swear words and vulgarity.

Answer 19

I would drive her to school the first day and talk to the principal and tell the school what has been going on at home.  Pick her up the first day too, so she feels safe and knows that you will protect her.  Drive her in the second day, but let her take the bus home.  Be waiting for her at the bus stop so you know immediately if there are any problems.  This way, she will know how to ride the bus in case there is ever a time that you can't drive her.  If you let the school know that there have been problems they should keep an eye out that no one is bothering her.  In my town, the bullies would be kicked off the bus.

Answer 20

I would ask her what she is comfortable with.. You wouldn't want your child to be afraid to go to school, and if something were to happen along the way, you wouldn't want her to start refusing to go.. I would start taking her, or perhaps offering to also take some of her real friends in the neighborhood as well, that way it doesn't look like she's afraid. Have you talked to the parents of the your daughters friends? Maybe they could also help to stop the harassment your daughter is going through.. This is a terrible situation your daughter is in, it's completely unfair that she has to endure this behavior from the other children.. I commend you doing everything you can, and would just start by talking to her about what she would like to do.