Should I tell my best friend that I'm g*y?

Question

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He never enquires about my sexuality... but I feel like I'm keeping a big secret from him?

I don't feel comfortable coming out to him because I feel it's going to ruin the relationship and I know people are going to call me chicken or say that I'm living a lie...

but I just don't want to say anything...

I tried to break off the friendship before we graduated high school but he tried to contact me... after we graduated high school so I can't ignore him... and now the friendship is even stronger and I'm still keeping a secret from a friend...

Answer 1

if hes a good friend he wouldnt care if you were g*y

Answer 2

Sounds like I'm just blurting this out without consideration but truth is, I say this with every beat of my heart; tell him.

This way it will clear the air for both of you and he'll know and you won't feel like you're keeping a secret/lying to him and it'll show if he really is a true friend to you.

Win-Win situation.

Hope this helps.

Answer 3

only tell him if you fell you are ready. theres no use and doing something you will later regret. If you trust him & you are ready then sure tell him.

Answer 4

Well, yes I think you should.

If he decides to not accept you for it, then he wasn't the best friend you thought he was.

Answer 5

I didnt need to even read the additional info

The answer has to be "yes, tell him"

Answer 6

I THINK THE BEST WAY IS BE A REALLY GUY..BE YOURSELF BROTHER..THAT WAS THE ONLY WAY..TELLING YOUR FRIEND WILL NOT STOP ANY PROBLEM..PLEASE THINK YOUR 10,15,30 YEARS LATER..LIFE IS FROM GOD..YOU WERE NOT BORNED FOR THIS..BELIEVE ME..

Answer 7

go ahead and tell him. what can you lose?

if he doesnt want to be your friend because you're g*y, then he isn't really YOUR friend. being g*y is an important aspect of who you are and his reaction is a good test for his friendship.

at any rate, however he reacts, give him a couple of days to digest it. you can tell it to him gradually, sort of make him suspect and then confirm his suspicion. dont do it in a dramatic way "listen i got something to tell you, come over"... you can also just talk about things as if he's always known you're g*y and never needed to be told.

something that might surprise you (or not) is that he's having a very similar dillema himself and doesnt know if to tell you he's g*y or not because he's afraid of your reaction.

one more thing you need to bear in mind is that people come and go into our lives.  

Answer 8

Id just tell him man. Hes gunna find out sooner or later. And you will know how good of a freind he really is. And make sure when you tell him he knows you arent telling him because you have a thing for him. Be sure to update how it goes if you decide to tell him! And GL.

Answer 9

Well, you should if you feel that it's time for him to know more about you but be careful because this may ends up badly, just be prepared because different people got different opinions, my best friend can't take the fact that I'm g*y so I still not out to her.

The other option is that you can hint him a little or make some comments like "Hey, my friend is g*y, what do you think? I think it's okay because we are friends and I don't care" or "I'm bored, hey, what if I'm g*y, what will you think about that?"

Answer 10

I don't think he cares, don't fell like you have to ditch him as a mate to cover yourself. Just tell him, what's the worst that could happen? I mean seriously, so he won't be your friend anymore, you're already trying to distance yourself from him.

I think you want to tell him, so just do, nothing ventured nothing gained.

Answer 11

Hay! hay! before doing that first ask his opinion about homosexuality. if u don't...u might end up loosing ur friend.

and dot ask directly...ask when situation arises.

Answer 12

Hey. I was in your position last month. Although he assumed I was 100% straight. I guess I had fueled that assumption.

I too felt like I was lieing. Also, I started dating men. I figured he was going to find out: from me, or someone else. It was better coming from me.

I forced myself to tell him. Rode my bike to his house, told him I walked to talk out on a nearby oval. I didn't get very far, and I broke down (couldn't help it). I ditched my prepared speach and just said 'I'm g*y'. He hugged me, and said from the way I was acting, he thought I was going to say I had cancer.

I feel even closer to him than ever. He finally knows me entirely after all these years. No more lieing.

I guess whether you tell your friend deprends on two things: 1) What do you think his response will be and do you care. I negative, are you willing to let him go? 2) Do you really need to tell him? You mentioned you tried to end the friendship. I would never leave my friend on purpose....So are you really that close.

Answer 13

Well in my opinion if he is straight it might affect your relations with him. It all depends in his point of view. For some people would be normal cuz they accept others as they are for some others opinion affects them.

Sooner or later this thing will come out cuz you cant hide forever that you are g*y, someday you will need to be with somebody and people see and hear everywhere so is better you tell him the truth and after that it all depends on him.

Tell him that you recently discovered that you are g*y or like something has been making you unsure of yourself and you came up with this conclusion but tell him that your friendship with him is very important but no feelings involved cuz you might ruin everything.

Goodluck