Should I tell my mom... or not?

Question

My parents are separated, but I'm living with my mom and brother. My mom's birthday is Sunday, and that also happens to be the day of a bridal shower for my cousin. Somehow, my dad arranged to have my aunts and cousins sing "Happy Birthday" to my mom at the shower.

But my mom hates to be the center of attention like that - like, *HATES* it. My dad told me about the singing plan today, and he asked me if I could keep it a secret from my mom, so she'll be surprised.

The only thing is - I know my mom will eventually find out that my dad organized the singing, and she'll be even more mad at him than she already is. Not to mention that she'll be embarrassed about being sung to in the first place.

So, should I break my promise to my dad and tell my mom that they're going to sing, so she can at least be prepared... or should I just stay out of it?

Thanks in advance.

Answer 1

singing happy birthday is a nice thing and if your mom complains then she needs to grow up,its actually a nice thing that your dad has done.

sounds like mom is a bit childish really.

Answer 2

No. Don't tell her.

The fact that your mom is uncomfortable with receiving love & attention is HER issue. The fact that your dad doesn't get that is between your mom, & your dad.

I think it was wrong of your dad to put you in a position where you have to keep a secret from her, but how would her knowing what's going on make it any better?

If she knows about your dad's birthday suprise for her, then she'll probably end up not going to the shower at all.

Just let it happen, & let her deal with it in her own way when it comes.

Answer 3

Tell your mom.  Or better yet, tell your aunts and cousins that your mom would be incredibly embarrassed and that your father was just arranging it to get to your mom.

Answer 4

Tell him that the Bridal shower is for your cousin to be center of attention, not Mom.  And that Mom will embarrassed especially if she took attention off your cousin.  If he wants to do something for Mom do it another day or at a different time of the day.  Good luck to you!

Answer 5

Tell your Mom about it. Sounds like your Dad is up to some stupid tricks to bug your Mom.

Answer 6

yes I would tell your mom if she really hates that I know I do its not really much of a promise either lol

Answer 7

Stay out of it. Your father asked you not to tell your mother. So the onus is on him, not on you. Besides, you may sometime need to tell your father to "not tell anyone" and how could expect him to keep quiet when you didn't. If your mother finds out that you knew and didn't tell her, just say, "I know! I know! But Dad made me promise not to tell." She will understand.  

Answer 8

if its going to make the situation worse between your mom and dad, you should probably tell your dad how mad she'll be and how it'll make things worse between them. so that way hopefully your dad will tell you to tell her or call it off.

Answer 9

well it kind of seems harmless so I'd stay out of it, but you are saying your mom hates that type of attn. well I'd go to your dad first and try to figure out if hes honestly doing this to celebrate her bday or just to put her in the spot and emberras her. tell him you would have rather not known and been put in that position b/c if your mom finds out she's going to be upset with you and see where it goes from there.

Answer 10

tell ur mom def.