Should I tell my therapist I'm seeing another therapist behind her back?

Question

It's getting financially difficult to juggle two but I get different things out of each. What should I do? Each don't know I'm seeing another too and now I feel like I have to pick and don't know which to drop and what to say to them as the excuse.

Answer 1

You have every right to see whoever you choose, so don't feel bad about dropping one.     If I were you,  I would keep the one that has been most helpful.

Listen to yourself, when you say after 2 years I can't say thanks for your help by by.

They are your therapist not friends.  You pay these people to listen to you.  You feel guilty as if you were choosing one friend over another.  Friends don't charge us.  If you didn't have money,  they wouldn't bother with you in the first place.

Answer 2

You sound like you are afraid of cheating on them! LOL

Do you mean you are getting different drugs from each one? Or are they just therapists?

If you are using them for the drugs, if they are psychiatrists, it sounds like something has to end. You do not have to have an excuse to stop seeing one of them. Just don't make any more appointments with the one you don't want to see. You obviously feel guilty about something. You need to be honest with your self.

Answer 3

just stop going to one of them. You don't have to say anything

Answer 4

Why do you feel the need to see two?  If the first one didn't seem to be helping you and that's why you went to see the second then stay with the second.  Just be honest with the Counsellor and free them so they can help someone else who needs them.

I wish you well x

Answer 5

No wonder you're seeing two therapists... lol... The whole point of therapy is to be open and honest about your life.  I would explore with each of them reasons to stay with them.  They will understand.  They will not be mad.  Every therapist is not a perfect fit for every client.  Just be honest and everything will be fine.

Answer 6

Stop sabotaging your therapy.

Any ethical therapist will not treat a client that is also in therapy elsewhere, unless it's something totally different, like couple's therapy or addictions treatment.

It starts with telling them your thinking, conflict, and confusion.  How they each respond will probably give you a good clue of which way to go.  (Which may be so stop seeing them both and start fresh with someone they recommend.)

Answer 7

My FIRST thought is that NEITHER of them is doing YOU justice!  If you get SOME things from ONE, and OTHER things from the OTHER, then NEITHER of them is DOING a GOOD job for YOU!  Actually, they are probably HARMING you, because, just as YOU have IMPLIED, YOU have to wonder why one says one thing, and the other says something else!  You need to have ONE who is doing the TOTAL job!

No wonder it is so expensive!  In spite of whatever each one tells you, YOU have to still be wondering WHY you get different answers!  Or, do you ask each one different questions?

I'm not going to TELL you what to DO, but hopefully I'll give you something to THINK about!

I would be checking-out a THIRD party -- not necessarily GOING to a THIRD - YET...  (why ADD another expense?)

And, maybe it would be a GOOD thing to tell each of the ones you ARE going to that you ARE seeing another!  WRITE down NOTES, and present the SAME thing to EACH of them, and then compare the answers they give you! You are spending (as YOU well KNOW) over $600.00 per WEEK, and still having questions...  such as "WHY am I going to TWO therapists?"

I also feel that YOU have more attachment to THEM, than THEY do to YOU!  If NOT, you wouldn't be worried about making an 'excuse'...  YOU don't NEED an 'excuse'!  YOU are PAYING them to provide a SERVICE to you, and after TWO YEARS, where is the 'light at the end of the tunnel?'  Or, do they PLAN on YOUR 'financial contributions', and therefore, KEEP you coming BACK for MORE?!

I would hate to think about going in for some surgery, for example, and having the Doctor keep telling me that he has a little more to DO, but no END DATE!  NO GOAL in mind!

Although I don't RECOMMEND it, you have to REALIZE that you COULD go to the local PUB, and get 'THERAPY'...  they say that 'Misery loves company!'  Depends on what kind of 'therapy' you want!  I'm SURE that for the price of a few beers, you could TALK to someone, EVERY DAY, at a much reduced price!  Of course, you might have to do some Research as to the best place to get the appropriate commiseration and advice!  (Sort of like picking the best Therapist!)  

Well, this might not be the ANSWER you were looking for, but I DO hope it gives you something to THINK about!

Good LUCK!

Answer 8

It's unethical for a second therapist to get involved in your treatment from the first one. If you are honest (which I think you should be) I think that each therapist will ask you to choose one.

Answer 9

The key word to this entire question was "excuse".  If you are seeing a therapist the only way you'll get out of it what you put into it is by being honest.  You obviously are not being honest with either of them if you feel the need for an "excuse".

If you were being 100% honest with either of them then there would be little or no excuse to see them both.

If you're going to pay for their service then do yourself a service by being truthful.

Answer 10

well which ever one helps you out the most  

Answer 11

If you aren't comfortable telling them this then you should drop both and get a third or just stop therapy altogether. They don't seem to help you.