Should We Let Then Go?

Question

My 13 yr. old daughter and my 13 yr. old step-daughter(well she won't tecnially be my step-daughter until June, but still..)have boyfriends. It is innocent. They just go for bikerides, go to movies(with me or my fiance somewhere near)and hang out at the house(in the livingroom or the kitchen).

My fiance took my daughter and her boyfriend to the mall(they wanted to go get a CD or something)and my other kids were at sleepovers or with their cousin. Anyway, it was just me, my step-daughter, step-daughter's boyfriend and his parents. His parents brought up their April break trip to the Grand Canyon(we live in Pheniox,AZ). Then they said "Gabbie, we'd love if Roxi(my daughter), Trevor(my daughter's boyfriend), Kristen(my step-daughter)to join us in the Canyons. Trevor's parents already said it was alright, but I need your consent, aswell as your fiance's."

Now, I trust my daughter and my step-daughter and their boyfriends, but I'm a little nervous. It'll be for 2 wks. and(c)

Answer 1

Unfortunately we live in a time where s*x at 13 is not abnormal... in fact where 15 year olds think they are weird if their are virgins.  There is so much pressure on these kids from the outside, not to mention what is already happening within their own bodies.  

Now... that being said I think that their are other factors to take into consideration.  Have you had straight talk about s*x, disease, birth control and the emotional ramifications of sexual relationships with your girls?  How would they feel if they had s*x with these boys and were dumped a month later?  Have you played the "senerio game" where you give them a senerio and they tell you how they would handle it.  You are the one with the tools, you need to give them to the girls so that they are prepared.

Then the question is about the parents in charge.  Often the parents of boys are less worried about sexual situations than a girls parents.  (NOT always, just sometimes) Where do these parents stand.  Are you 100% sure your girls will be safe?  Would they handle an emergency the same way you would, should someone get hurt or go missing for example?  

Once you have all these things answered between you and your hubby-to-be, the answer on what to do will seem way more clear.  

Good luck.

Answer 2

i see why it could pose a problem. but i don't see why you should let that stop you from letting your kids have a little bit of freedom. if it is innocent then let it be innocent. there will be parentals involved so i don't see why you would second guess yourself.  i think everything should be fine.

Answer 3

Yes, as long as they are safe, and since you trust them all, it will be fine.

Answer 4

i would say let them go. they listen to you and dont argue and try to be alone. give them some trust. im sure they will not abuse it. just got to hope that you and your fiance raised your kids right.By your story i think they should get to go.

Answer 5

If you do let them go I would make sure both girls are on some kind of birth control.  All you need is a grandchild at this point in your life.

Answer 6

if its been innocent for long then you should let them go. its nice that you are worrying and its normal too with whats going on in our country lately along with jamie lynn spears and all but if you trust your daughters enough i would not worry about them. the worst they could do is kiss, and thats really not bad. just tell them how youre worrying and lay down a couple ground rules.

          i mean if they are going to be supervised the whole time there is nothing to worry about. i would let them go because they are 13 and they are old enough to do these things.

    but even if you do say no its okay because eventually they will get over it because they are your daughters and they love you.

Answer 7

It depends how well you know these people in all honesty.

Answer 8

If the thought of the trip with the girls and boys both going makes you nervous, then there is a reason you are concerned. I would not allow it, for the same fears you have.

Answer 9

I wouldn't let my daughter go! She's only 6 right now, but I wouldn't if she was 13. It only takes a minute to have s*x! Could you imagine her whole life being ruined for 1 minute? And 2 weeks is a long time.

Answer 10

i would say let them go. they probably really want to

Answer 11

I'm  going to say let them both do it. This is coming from a 13 year old, but this will show that you trust them. For a teenager, it is really important to feel your parents trust you. And there is fullparental supervision, so I don't think you have anything to worry about.

Answer 12

no.

you can trust the girls and the boys, and they can be great people, but adolescent hormones are adolescent hormones.  i wouldn't do it.